The Unhinged Father

Five months. No goodbye episode, no explanation — just gone. If you're still here, that means something, and Robbie appreciates it more than he's going to admit.

He's back, and the last five months have been a lot. Baby number three joined two kids already in school and sports, a wife back at work, and a corporate job that just decided parental flexibility is no longer a company concern. Oh, and a coworker who called paternity leave a "vacation."

This one's a check-in more than a deep dive — raw, a little unpolished, recorded at 5:45am while an 8-month-old waits in his crib. But it's real, and it hits on something a lot of working parents are quietly feeling right now: the gap between what companies say they value and what they actually reward, why parents are somehow expected to be hyper-productive AND be present, and what it means to be the type of man — and dad — you actually want to be when the job asks you to choose.

Welcome back to the chaos.

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One in eight men globally report mental health disorders. Seventy percent will avoid seeking help entirely. Only one in four men who admit to depression will ever go to therapy. Robbie found those numbers deeply concerning — and then realized he'd been one of them for most of his adult life.

This isn't a therapy pitch. It's not a dadfluencer telling you that dads have it hard. It's a real conversation from someone who spent years white-knuckling his way through depression and anxiety, calling it stress, calling it tiredness, telling himself that needing help made him less of a man — until he finally figured out what was actually going on and why he'd been so resistant to facing it.

Robbie opens up about his own ongoing struggles with anxiety and depression, his ADHD diagnosis, why he still doesn't have a therapist right now, and the one reframe that changed how he thinks about all of it — you're not asking for help, you're refueling.

Topics covered: why men are culturally wired to avoid asking for help and where that wiring comes from, the gradual signs Robbie now recognizes when he's heading into a depressive cycle, why suffering in silence doesn't protect your family — it just makes them watch you suffer from the outside, what getting help actually looks like when therapy isn't your starting point, why naming it out loud to one person is sometimes the only first step you need, and the hardest truth in the episode — the version of you that never asks for anything, never shows weakness, never admits to struggling — that version isn't strong. That version is alone.

If this one resonates, share it with someone who needs to hear it. There are a lot of men carrying things they don't have to carry alone.

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There are two guys Robbie wants to talk about. One brushes his teeth with brake fluid, hasn't communicated a feeling since 1987, and thinks vulnerability is something that happens to other people. The other one is so emotionally available he makes Miss Rachel look like Brock Lesnar. Both of them are a problem. And somewhere between these two caricatures, real men — real dads — are supposed to figure out who they're actually supposed to be.

This is the masculinity episode TUF has been building toward. Not a lecture on what you should be. An honest look at where we're at, what we're being sold, and what it actually looks like to show your kids the full picture of what a man is — strong when they need a wall, goofy when they need a goofball, and emotionally present when they need someone to sit on the floor with them.

Robbie is an Enneagram 8. Vulnerability doesn't come naturally. This episode is him working through it out loud — and making the case that the strongest version of a dad is the one who can do all three.

Topics covered: the manosphere and why the brake fluid masculinity model has real costs for your kids and your marriage, what's actually missing on the other extreme, why your family needs different things from you at different times and why knowing which one to give them is the whole job, the specific moments where Robbie has shown his boys each side of him, and why controlled chaos — emotion plus reason — is the most powerful thing a man can develop.

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We are raising the first generation of kids who will never know a world without screens, infinite content, and instant gratification — and most of us are figuring it out as we go. In this episode, Robbie gets real about his own phone habits, why "tough shit, go be bored" is actually good parenting, and how to raise kids who can live in the real world without being left behind in the digital one.

No anti-technology rants. No shame for parents who hand over the tablet sometimes. Just an honest, practical conversation about what it means to be screen-smart — for your kids and for yourself.

Topics covered: why boredom builds better kids, the difference between overscheduled and overstimulated children, how to set guardrails without going full Amish, and why the example you're setting right now matters more than any rule you put in place later.

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If you're a dad in your 30s or 40s who hasn't seen a doctor in years, still thinks you can eat like you're 22, and keeps telling yourself you'll "get healthy later" — this one is for you. Because later has a way of becoming never.

Robbie gets brutally honest about skipping physicals for five years, his history with high blood pressure and high cholesterol, the slow reality of losing weight after 35, and why getting healthy isn't vanity — it's showing up for your kids in the way they deserve.

Topics covered: why dads avoid doctors and what it's actually costing you, realistic approaches to weight loss and fitness with a newborn and a full schedule, the mind-body connection nobody talks about, and why wanting to look good for your wife is a completely valid reason to get in shape.

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"Am I failing as a parent? Am I screwing my kids up?" If those thoughts have crossed your mind lately, this episode is for you. Because when your kid's behavior goes sideways during a big transition — new baby, new school, new house — it's easy to take it personally. And that's exactly when you make it worse.

Robbie walks through a year of nonstop change in his own family and gets honest about what his kids' tantrums were really telling him — and what his own reaction was actually saying about him. This episode is less about fixing your kid and more about understanding what's happening in both of you.

Topics covered: why transitions cause behavioral explosions in kids, what your child's nervous system is actually doing during a meltdown, how your emotional state pours gasoline on the fire, and practical tools that have actually worked — not just in theory, but in Robbie's house last week.

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Everyone checks on the pregnant woman. The moment that baby arrives, the world moves on — and mom is left bleeding, sleep-deprived, hormonally wrecked, and expected to figure it out. As a dad of three, Robbie has seen this up close, and he's not going to pretend it isn't happening.

This episode is for every dad who has ever said "she's fine" when she's clearly not — and for every mom who wishes her partner actually understood what she was going through. Honest, direct, and from someone who admits he was a complete dipshit the first time around and had to figure it out the hard way.

Topics covered: what actually happens to a woman's body and hormones after birth, why the healthcare system largely abandons moms the moment the baby arrives, how to be a real partner instead of a well-meaning bystander, and what Robbie does differently now on baby three versus baby one.

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A few hours before heading to the hospital for the induction of his third son, Robbie sits down and hits record. No prep, no plan — just everything going through his head in real time. The fears, the work pressure, the sleep deprivation already starting, and what he's learned about himself across three kids that he wishes he'd known going into the first.

If you're about to become a parent — or you're already in it and wondering why it feels harder than you expected — this is the episode you didn't know you needed.

Topics covered: the anxiety nobody talks about before baby three, managing work expectations during paternity leave, how Robbie went from being a "complete shithead" as a new dad to the father he is today, and why having kids either forces you to grow or exposes exactly where you haven't.

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You know what you want to change. You've known for a while. And every time you get close to starting — something comes up, you talk yourself out of it, or you decide you'll just do it tomorrow. And then tomorrow becomes next week becomes next year. Sound familiar?

Robbie gets into the thing that's actually blocking most people from making real changes in their life — and it's not motivation, it's not discipline, and it's not time. It's the starting. And there's a specific reason that first step feels so impossible, and a specific way to make it less so.

Topics covered: why the start is always the hardest part and what to do about it, the difference between being kind to yourself and coddling yourself back into complacency, why the all-or-nothing mentality is killing your progress, and how to build the grit to just go — even when you're not fully ready and never will be.

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Not a resolution episode. Not a "new year new me" pep talk. This is Robbie sitting down with a notebook, going through every area of his life that actually matters, and being honest about where he's at and where he wants to go — health, family, friendship, faith, business, and the legacy he's trying to leave for his kids.

If you've been meaning to slow down and think about what you actually want your life to look like — not the highlight reel version, the real one — this is a good place to start.

Topics covered: why health is the foundation everything else is built on, the challenge of making real friends as an adult man, how faith fits into Robbie's life without the evangelical sledgehammer, what legacy actually means when you're 38 with three boys, and why the podcast exists in the first place.

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