The Way is Love

Do not Quit just yet. Open!

Have you ever been there?  You know.  That place where you just want to quit.  Maybe it's your job?  Maybe it's the relationship you are in? Maybe it's school, the book club, whatever.  We have all probably hit that point where the pressure of a situation becomes unbearable, when it seems there are few solutions  or when it seems the only solution is to quit. What has focusing taught me about these moments and how can focusing help you in these moments? Well, what I have come to learn is that this is a great moment.  The moment of wanting to quit hits everyone and quitting is sometimes the very best choice given the situation.  As I have sat with this question in a focusing way in my own life, an interesting answer came to me and I want to share it with you. I won't take you through the whole session but I finally arrived at a point where the message became very clear and what I was being shown is that this moment was a great opportunity to open.  Maybe it was a bit clearer than that even.  What was coming for me was the idea that this was exactly the time I should be more open, that this was a time that I should maybe use the opportunity as a chance to turn toward things from a different perspective to allow my thinking around the situation to open. It was letting me know that I could see this whole situation around quitting as a chance to explore something else. Really what it was giving me was a chance to be open about a situation rather than be closed, which is the way I was perceiving the quitting, as a way to close a situation, walk away from it or end it and not fully engaging in the possibilities it quittin was presenting.  Quitting can be quite final, in this case it was a starting point. Quitting might be the point at which people turn back after a long journey, or really maybe it's like a door that is ready to be opened.  And sometimes we quit when we have arrived at the doorstep and then quitting rears it's ugly head.

By now some of you might ask; but what if I want to quit something?

Is that OK? Of course that is ok Let's take smoking as an example.  That might be a thing where you do want to quit or stop. And you do, you stop, you quit and it's hard.  I should know, way back I used to smoke and when I smoked I liked it but something was really letting me know it was time to quit. So I did, many, many, many times.  In my case, I kept getting to the point where I wanted to quit, "quitting smoking" and I would smoke again. Do you see where I am going with this?  I kept arrving at a new quitting moment.  That moment was the moment I wanted to quit and give up, I was quitting NON-smoking!  And I kept on quitting and giving in to that feeling of wanting to smoke and instead of getting over the hump and BEING OPEN, I would fall back into smoking and a new cycle of wanting to quit smoking. Looking at that situation now.  I was being open enough to the idea of quitting smoking, actually getting to the point of doing it and then giving in to it, or quitting being a non-smoker. Now I know there is a lot of chemical stuff going on with this kind of addiction and that is a physical thing that Focusing would have probably helped a lot with at the time as well.

I didn't know focusing then and I finally quit with the help of hypnosis.

I have never smoked since. So, it's interesting to be at these points of quitting and they are usually driven by a deep wanting that is WAY beyond wanting to quit the particular thing and that is why I encourage you to learn focusing, because the next time you come up to one of these quitting moments, you might find that it is a great chance to open up, to see what else is there for you, to get in touch with the things that might be lurking just underneath or way beneath the surface that might be a key to understanding what drives all of this.  You might just find that thing within you that takes you on a different path, or better yet you might discover something that was helpful and hidden that you never knew. You might go through the process and find that quitting is the absolute right thing and obviously that is OK too. The important thing is the process and allowing it to play out from within you. Quitting can be a jumping off point to stay the course or to move on, but if you make that decision in a focusing way, then you are sure to make it from a place in you that is right for you in that moment, leading you to what is next. LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS  

Download to listen later Are you the universe? Here is a quote from Gene Gendlin that allows us a tiny peek into his philosophy and an understanding of the depth and power of the focusing process.  It's also a view into how the universe might lie right within us.  In this episode, I thought I would take a simple paragraph from Gene Gendlin's original book on focusing and break it down into a few parts to help explain what we are talking about when in focusing we talk about "the body". First off, heres it the quote and then we will break it down. Gendlin from the his book - Focusing   “When I use the word “body” I mean more than the physical machine. Not only do you physically live the circumstances around you  but also those  you only think of in your mind.  Your physically felt body is in fact part of a gigantic system of here and other places, now and other times, you and other people.  In fact, the whole universe.  This sense of being bodily alive in a vast system is the body and it is felt from inside.” Ok, so here goes.  Gene starts this paragraph by letting us in on how he perceives the word body, both as it relates to the organism and focusing as a whole. Right off the bat he is expanding the idea of what most people think the body is.  Some might divide the organism into parts, the body being one of them.  But here Gene states.  "When I use the word body I mean more that the physical machine. " It's an important distinction and a perspective shifting moment.  I'll share a personal story of an experience I had with a cardiologist once. I had been reading a lot and following "Heartmath" a research institute in California dedicated to discovering heart intelligence.  The initial thought was to connect the fact that the heart and brain develop at about the same pace in the fetus and that the heart has the second highest number of electrical impulse points compared to the brain.  The overall idea is that the heart has its own intelligence that informs the body or own thoughts, emotions and sentiments. I was so excited to share this idea with a cardiologist I had met at a dinner party but I was left a bit shocked at the response.  "bah," he said, "it's just a muscle, it's a pump, that's it. There is nothing else."  I gasped and kept quiet.  But, it was informative, because we humans can can use our analysis skills and rational thought process to form any kind of reality. Now, I happen to believe that the heart is a lot more than just a pump or a muscle, especially since I have had many focusing experience which generate directly from the heart space and the feeling, thoughts, images and sensations that come from that part of the body. So, this paragraph reminded me of that experience, here Gene is saying, "listen here, when I say body, I mean a lot more than a machine." He is opening us up to the whole, to more, to possibility. Next he adds, "Not only do you physically live the circumstances around you but also those  you only think of in your mind." Here, I feel Gene is connecting things to the whole, he is bringing the body and our thoughts into one experience.  He is also beginning to lay out a foundation, one that reminds us that we are connected to all things.  Everything from Religion to Quantum Physics has been expounding on this idea in man's never ending search for identity. Here Gene reminds us that we live in the outside world and our inside world simultaneously, while reminding us that "circumstances" can also be a creation within our own thoughts or though patterns. Next sentence.  Your physically felt body is in fact part of a gigantic system of here and other places, now and other times, you and other people.  Wow!  That really expresses the wholeness of an individual and the way in which we, as individuals are part of what he describes as a "gigantic" system, one that spans time and space, "here and other places, now and other times".  What a beautiful sentiment to lay down about the body, that the body, and we, are the sum of so many things, that we carry the wholeness of time, place and space inside ourselves.  Here Gene might really be telling us about the possibility of the human life force and also he shares its capacity.  We are GIGANTIC, which might not even be a word that expresses what we are largely enough. The idea that we are this container that is huge and ever expanding.  Which leads us directly to: "In fact, the whole universe.  This sense of being bodily alive in a vast system is the body and it is felt from inside.” Here we can connect whole whole universe  to the being, but also Gene is expressing each individual as being, "bodily alive" within a "vast system" but at the same time he understands the individual and personal nature of this feeling because the experience is "felt from the inside".  This is of course, just a small taste of what Gene has shared about his philosophy and in one paragraph he is expressing what the focusing experience can lead us to understand about our inner connections, our inner workings and the whole universe.  We have the capacity to experience ALL OF THIS, from within the body, that carbon unit that we may sometimes believe is just meat and bones, and blood, muscle and nerve. Something tells me that we, that you are a lot more. He might even be giving us a glimpse into the thought that thing that ties it all together is us, or that the capacity for us to express and live through our body in this place, from this deep focusing well. Is this very fabric of the thing we like to refer to as the human experience. IN this one paragraph Gene implies so much about where, who and what we are, but it also allows us to approach our own focusing work from the realm of great personal capacity and limitless possibility. Five sentences, when strung together in this way,  describes a philosophy and opens a doorway into the me. LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS     Here is an interesting video about the heart - brain connection.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8dKcvROnl4

Is Focusing your little secret? Or do you carry any kind of little secret.  You know the good things, maybe the guilty pleasures or maybe you keep the things that give you an edge secret, so no one else can muscle in on whatever that thing is.  Well, I have a small confession to make.  Until recently Focusing, was my little secret and only through focusing did I come to understand why I wanted to keep the focusing part of my life, which is way more than just a part, somewhat secret. I sort of started out by asking myself a few key questions about focusing and how it related to the rest of my life. I realised that I was kind of keeping focusing to one side, using it for my own benefit, but maybe not sharing my joy or my knowledge of it as fully as I could. So these were the questions that were coming up for me.  How open are you about your focusing  work when talking about it with other people? It's a question that came to me one morning while I was exercising and of course, allowing my body to fall into the rhythm of focusing.  So I sat with it a while and so much came up around it.  First, something came up around the  idea that I had been using focusing as a little secret.  Then a few questions came. Was I a little embarrassed to talk about it? What were people going to think? That I was practicing some kind of "self help"? Was my upbringing getting in the way and creating a kind of judgement I might think others perceive around anything to do with helping oneself live life fuller, feel better and gain a deeper understanding?  All of this was there.  It was very present but I just sat with it as I was exercising. Just a note on exercise. If you can get past the whole idea of the physical struggles that come with exercise and perhaps focus on breathing or the movement or imagining you r movement, then you can get into another layer, one that is very contemplative and it is quite amazing how rapidly and frequently the body will respond and present information. For those of you who have ever done any running and described it as meditative or a relaxing experience, what I am trying to describe is a lot like that but it becomes much more proactive as focusing is a very active, listening and relating and proactive process. So then the question came. Something in me was presenting this question: Is focusing a secret I was keeping? Or perhaps it is something I was practicing but did not want to share. Then, something in me helped me realise that I was sort of selfishly keeping the focusing space quiet and private because it was a fantastic and glorious internal space that is entirely my own.  At times being in the quiet focusing space is the only quiet time we get.  Focusing time can be a refuge and also a great way to engage in inner dialog about anything you want to bring to the process. It's the only place where we can slow down to a point of truly listening and understanding what is going on and to take the time, one by one, to listen and explore what is going on for us. We have all probably experienced at one time or another, guilty pleasures.  Don't we usually keep those things very private and intimate?  We tend not to share those things perhaps because we don't want anyone to take it away from us.  Sometimes we do it through food, secret relationships, spending or shopping, quiet drives in our car away from family and friends. We all tend to long for and want to experience these intimate moments with ourselves as a way of getting lost or getting reacquainted with or organising our thoughts and actions. The reality for me is that through focusing I can enter into that space at any moment, within any context and any situation.  Through practice we can find ourselves "living in a focusing way".  Then the words we shown to me. Spread the word! I've been focusing for almost eight years and I have to say that I while my focusing has been enormously beneficial, allowing me to make major changes in my life and to  tap into the wisdom of how I want to live my life and my own sense of rightness, I have to say that I haven't shared it all that much with the exception of genuinely curious people.  This podcast is a testament to how what starts as an action block turns into a very pleasurable activity after focusing and finding just the right thing. In the midst of all this active focusing the body just began showing me what was right.  What was right, was to write about this and share it. And as I share these words a whole world of good is coming over me, both internally and externally.  What a simple but powerful process I've come to know and I hope you come to know, known as Focusing. LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

Download to listen later Focusing in the Gaza Strip I often speak about putting focusing to the test.  Does it work? To me a test means stressing something to the point where you understand it’s failure or breaking point.  I have put focusing to this test in my own life, always looking for situations where it does not apply or can not help. I have not been able to break it. Today on the Focusing way podcast we are going to hear about one of those ultimate tests. Doctor Mohamad Altawil is PhD in Mental Health, has a PhD in Clinical Psychology, Chartered Psychologist, Complex-Trauma Psychotherapist, Family Psychotherapist, CBT Practitioner, Focusing Oriented Psychotherapist Clinical Psychologist in Green Branch Clinic and Founder of Palestine Trauma Centre. I’ve just read you a long list of accomplishments. What makes it more amazing is that Mohamed Altawil is Palestinian.   As a boy he threw stones, suffered beatings that left him permanently disabled and has spent time in prison. He was born and raised in a refugee camp in the Gaza strip. [caption id="attachment_656" align="alignnone" width="225"] Mohamed Altawil[/caption] Over the past five years, he has been training in Focusing with adults with Jerry Conway, Focusing trainer and UK co-ordinator of the Focusing in Gaza project.He has also been training in Focusing with children and families with Simon Kilner, TFI Certifying Coordinator for Adult and Child Training, The Focusing Institute. He has been a registered as Focusing Trainer since 2014. He worked as a research fellow and coordinator at the University of Hertfordshire from 2010 till 2012 in developing the Family Therapy Project designed to reduce levels of PTSD and empower the resilience of traumatised children and their families in the Gaza Strip. In this powerful conversation he shares with us his pathway out of Gaza, but also his powerful passion to help his people and he is using his education and focusing as primary tools to help the people back in Gaza who are still suffering the trauma of living in an occupied state.     LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

Download to listen later Focusing in the Gaza Strip - PART II I often speak about putting focusing to the test.  Does it work? To me a test means stressing something to the point where you understand it’s failure or breaking point.  I have put focusing to this test in my own life, always looking for situations where it does not apply or can not help. I have not been able to break it. Today on the Focusing way podcast we are going to hear about one of those ultimate tests. Doctor Mohamad Altawil is PhD in Mental Health, has a PhD in Clinical Psychology, Chartered Psychologist, Complex-Trauma Psychotherapist, Family Psychotherapist, CBT Practitioner, Focusing Oriented Psychotherapist Clinical Psychologist in Green Branch Clinic and Founder of Palestine Trauma Centre. I’ve just read you a long list of accomplishments. What makes it more amazing is that Mohamed Altawil is Palestinian.   As a boy he threw stones, suffered beatings that left him permanently disabled and has spent time in prison. He was born and raised in a refugee camp in the Gaza strip. [caption id="attachment_656" align="alignnone" width="225"] Mohamed Altawil[/caption] Over the past five years, he has been training in Focusing with adults with Jerry Conway, Focusing trainer and UK co-ordinator of the Focusing in Gaza project.He has also been training in Focusing with children and families with Simon Kilner, TFI Certifying Coordinator for Adult and Child Training, The Focusing Institute. He has been a registered as Focusing Trainer since 2014. He worked as a research fellow and coordinator at the University of Hertfordshire from 2010 till 2012 in developing the Family Therapy Project designed to reduce levels of PTSD and empower the resilience of traumatised children and their families in the Gaza Strip. In this powerful conversation he shares with us his pathway out of Gaza, but also his powerful passion to help his people and he is using his education and focusing as primary tools to help the people back in Gaza who are still suffering the trauma of living in an occupied state.     LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

Download to listen later Business Strategies & Focusing I want to share with you a business strategy I discovered recently. Just recently I had the opportunity to sit for a short focusing session which was going to last about ten minutes.  I know that many people might feel that they need a long time to "get into" the focusing mode, but my experience has been that I have had many very powerful short sessions. While I hold firm to the focusing adage, "slowing down is the fastest way there", I have to say that, devoting even just a short time to focusing can yield very powerful results. This is what happened. As I invited the idea of what I could focus with for this brief session a thought or feeling wandered over me about a meeting that I had scheduled for the next morning.  Just that small invitation to my body of, "Hmm, what should I focus with right now?" brought me, out of the blue, the idea that there was something I needed to look at more closely around the meeting I had scheduled in the morning. So, I decided to ask for a short lead in to discover what would come, or what wanted to be known about the meeting. At first I even had a thought toward, what could possibly come, but I let that part of me sit to one side and I committed to invite what wanted to be known about this meeting. This in itself is a beautiful focusing moment.  That thing that came out of the ether (or from with me) that wanted to look more closely at the morning meeting was acknowledged and almost as rapidly, something else comes along to try to negate or discredit that feeling. So, for the record, be aware of both things and check to see what that the original idea wants to express. This is how focusing happens in milliseconds and you need to be aware of the light speed at which this inner wisdom operates.  Focusing itself requires that you sharpen those inner listening skills. Things do happen in milliseconds.  Don't believe me?  How many times have you made a poor decision after you had already decided to make the correct one for you? I'll give you a simple example using ice cream. Your first instinct is toward chocolate. The person with you orders chocolate, something in you waffles and go for vanilla.  You sit down to have you ice cream, the vanilla is OK but when you try the chocolate you wish you had stuck with your gut. Point is.  Here is how you might do that in a Focusing way. Your first instinct is toward chocolate. The person with you orders chocolate, something in you waffles and go for vanilla. Now, you stop and recognize, "something want's chocolate AND  something else wants Vanilla" and you acknowledge both. Just by acknowledging both you are now in presence, you realize there are two things there, in this case choices and you sit with them both, moving toward the one that feels right to you in that moment. Maybe you go for the chocolate, maybe the vanilla, but the important thing is that you noticed and acknowledged both were present. Its this kind of awareness your focusing practice can bring. Among many other things of course. Now, there I was listening to a lead in and inviting what wanted to come around this business meeting.  Almost immediately my inner sense corrects me and refines the idea. It's about what qualities I want to bring to this meeting.  Ah, this part of me is communicating that what this is about is the qualities it wants me to bring to the meeting. So, I sit with it, listen. This thing is presenting around the middle of my chest and stomach as a kind of vague but pleasant warm sensation.  From that warmth comes the sense that one quality I should be bringing to the meeting is warmth. As I check that back, that fits because I actually like the person I'm set to meet with and something there is reminding me to bring the quality of warmth. As I sit with it some more, the same sense starts to open up and share a bit more about the qualities to bring to the meeting. I'm inviting these feelings, or more things to come. As, I do that the word sharing comes. As I check in with that, it's letting me know the word sharing is a quality I could bring to this meeting.  And I end up saying, "yeah!, I really want to share details about a project with this person" This ends up leading to other feelings like gratitude. As I check with that I am actually grateful this person is giving me some time to share some thoughts and ideas, so that is there too.  As I let all of that be there, I realize that a whole meeting strategy based on warmth, sharing and gratitude are very present and the original question is being answered from a very genuine place within me. I sit with all of that and I close out this short session by asking my body to remind me to bring all of this to the meeting tomorrow and to let me know anything else between now and then. So, now here I was, in a whole new place and with a whole new strategy and idea about an important meeting that goes way beyond a checklist of materials or information and to the essence of what a great meeting can be about, which is an exchange that leaves both parties energized. This is just one of many example of how focusing can put you in the place of authentic experiences and when you are being authentic there is a good chance others will notice that.  Just ten minutes of focusing on a subject that could have been a fleeting thought, turned out to remind me to bring me and certain qualities to the table at a meeting. The meeting, you ask? How did it go? I'll tell you what you are already sensing. It was a huge success.       LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

Download to listen later Listen to part one of our in-depth and informative focusing oriented conversation with Robert Lee. Robert Lee, Ph.D. is a Focusing innovator. He is an international leader in developing Focusing trainers. He led the Advanced Certification Weeklong at the Focusing Institute in New York for 7 years. A licensed psychologist, Lee has developed a new model for teaching focusing (called Domain Focusing) and he has developed a theory and practice for overcoming stubborn problems (Changing the Unchangeable through Domain Focusing—also known as Macroshifting). He has developed a comprehensive practice for working with difficulties in felt sense formation (Elusive Felt Sensing). In psychotherapy, he has developed special methods for using Focusing with anxiety and depression and with couple and group psychotherapy. [caption id="" align="alignleft" width="145"] Robert L. Lee[/caption]                 LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

Download to listen later [caption id="attachment_712" align="alignnone" width="398"] Jack Blackburn and Anastasia Brencick[/caption]   FOCUSING AND TOUCH  ANASTASIA BRENCICK AND JACK BLACKBURN Today on the Focusing way Podcast, focusing and touch and we introduce you Anastasia Brencick and Jack Blackburn. Both are Focusing Trainers who are exploring new and interesting ways of including Focusing as part of their daily work. Customarily, in Focusing we do not associate physical touch with the practice. It would not “normally” be considered a part of a focusing exchange or partnership.  Adding physical touch could break an implied “touch barrier” and could possibly infringe on the safety of the boundaries set out in Focusing practice and partnership as most of us understand it. Anastasia and Jack are both body workers. Anastasia holds a Master's in Applied Psychophysiology, an undergrad degree in social work. Jack holds Master’s degree in counseling.  Jack, among other things, is a teacher of body workers and other caregivers and Anastasia, among other things, teaches body workers and has a background as a social worker in domestic violence. Both are licensed massage practitioners and have taught professional classes combining touch and Focusing. What happens when the add Focusing to a bodywork practice and appropriate touch to a Focusing practice? Jack and Anastasia have come together to create Focusing courses for body workers and using Focusing to create a bridge between body workers and verbal therapists. Their goals are first, to enable more client empowerment and body-centered awareness… second, to use the principles of Focusing to support mutual understanding between the different caregiving professions. So, I invite you to sit back and enjoy this discussion on incorporating Focusing into body work and listen as Jack and Anastasia share the small miracles they have felt through their hands and their whole being by bringing “a focusing way” into their body healing practices.   LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

[caption id="attachment_712" align="alignnone" width="398"] Jack Blackburn and Anastasia Brencick[/caption]   FOCUSING AND TOUCH  ANASTASIA BRENCICK AND JACK BLACKBURN Today on the Focusing way Podcast, focusing and touch and we introduce you Anastasia Brencick and Jack Blackburn. Both are Focusing Trainers who are exploring new and interesting ways of including Focusing as part of their daily work. Customarily, in Focusing we do not associate physical touch with the practice. It would not “normally” be considered a part of a focusing exchange or partnership.  Adding physical touch could break an implied “touch barrier” and could possibly infringe on the safety of the boundaries set out in Focusing practice and partnership as most of us understand it. Anastasia and Jack are both body workers. Anastasia holds a Master's in Applied Psychophysiology, an undergrad degree in social work. Jack holds Master’s degree in counseling.  Jack, among other things, is a teacher of body workers and other caregivers and Anastasia, among other things, teaches body workers and has a background as a social worker in domestic violence. Both are licensed massage practitioners and have taught professional classes combining touch and Focusing. What happens when the add Focusing to a bodywork practice and appropriate touch to a Focusing practice? Jack and Anastasia have come together to create Focusing courses for body workers and using Focusing to create a bridge between body workers and verbal therapists. Their goals are first, to enable more client empowerment and body-centered awareness… second, to use the principles of Focusing to support mutual understanding between the different caregiving professions. So, I invite you to sit back and enjoy this discussion on incorporating Focusing into body work and listen as Jack and Anastasia share the small miracles they have felt through their hands and their whole being by bringing “a focusing way” into their body healing practices.                 LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS

[caption id="attachment_725" align="alignnone" width="589"] Barbara Dickinson[/caption] INTERACTIVE FOCUSING (IR)  BARBARA DICKINSON Interactive Focusing teacher Barbara Dickinson finished a long career at the US Federal Reserve in 2010, and now consults on strategic organizational improvement. She has earned, among other credentials, certification as a Strengths Performance Coach from the Gallup Organization.   In 2006, she learned the practice called Focusing, completing her certification as a Focusing Professional in 2009, and is now an enthusiastic learner and teacher of the many facets of focusing and the related practice, “Thinking at the Edge.” After volunteering her services to The Focusing Institute as a management consultant in 2011 and 2012, Barbara decided to share her expertise more widely as a strengths-oriented consultant interested in helping individuals and non-profit organizations innovate, think and work at their “edge,” improve emotional intelligence and build better teams. Interactive Focusing (IR) She is especially interested in applying the Interactive Focusing method to help people form healthier relationships at all levels. Barbara lives in New Jersey with Holly, her Jack Russell Terrier. A few Articles and further reading  TAME – The Evolutionary Tale of How We Came to Work at Multiple Edges With Margaret Herrick, CFT The Folio, Volume 27, Number 1, 2016 Focusing with “Baby On Board” The Folio, Volume 24, Number 1, 2013 http://www.focusing.org/folio/Vol24No12013/TheFolio2013_web_Rev.pdf Emergence: A Glimpse of Life Beyond Sarcasm and Criticism by B. J. Dickinson, Focusing Connection, September 2010 (Vol. XXVII, No. 5) The Focusing Chair by B. J. Dickinson, Focusing Connection, January 2008 (Vol. XXV, No. 1) How I Spent My Summer School, by B. J. Dickinson (http://www.focusing.org/bulletinboard/insert-FISS.pdf)     LISTEN ON STITCHER SUBSCRIBE IN ITUNES LEARN FOCUSING TAKE A LEVEL ONE FOCUSING CLASS LISTEN TO RADICAL GENTLENESS