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What allows us to develop a relationship with our child—and what can get in the way?

In infancy, becoming a parent is also the beginning of getting to know a very real, very individual child. It’s a time of discovery: learning who this little person is, while also discovering who we are as their parent. But that process doesn’t always unfold the way we imagined.

Before our baby arrives, we may carry hopes, expectations, and dreams about what parenthood will be like—and even about who our child will be. Then we meet the actual baby. Their temperament, needs, rhythms, and ways of connecting may be very different from what we pictured. Sometimes, the gap between what we imagined and what we experience can leave us feeling confused, disappointed, overwhelmed, or even disconnected.

In this episode of the Becoming a Parent series, Presley and Val consider what helps us move beyond our expectations and become present to the child who has been entrusted to us. We explore what can get in the way of that encounter, and how the process of becoming a parent can invite us into something deeper: a willingness to receive our child as they are, to let ourselves be changed by relationship, and to trust that neither of us has to have it all figured out.

We’ll also look at what can interrupt or get in the way of this important process—and how recognizing those barriers can create new opportunities for connection.

Because becoming a parent isn’t simply about learning how to care for a baby. It’s about slowly discovering who this child is, who we are with them, and how the two of us come to know one another.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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We all begin the journey of parenthood with dreams. We imagine who our child will be, what they’ll love, how they’ll grow, and perhaps even the kind of relationship we’ll share. But eventually, every parent encounters the beautiful and sometimes difficult reality that the child we imagined is not quite the child we’ve been given.

In this episode of Becoming A Parent, we explore the ongoing process of reconciling our imagined child with our real child—and how that process can become part of our own maturation as parents. What does it look like to release our expectations while still faithfully guiding and discipling the child God has entrusted to us?

As Christian parents, this journey may also reveal something about our own growth in Christ. Just as parenting invites us to surrender our visions and expectations, following Jesus continually calls us to let go of our imagined lives and trust the life God is forming in us and our child.

What if becoming a parent is, in part, an invitation to become more like Christ—learning to love not the child we imagined, but the child we have been given, with humility, patience, delight, and grace?

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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Becoming a parent is more than bringing a baby home—it's the beginning of becoming someone new.

In this kickoff episode, we're introducing a brand-new series exploring the six stages of parenting and how our role as parents grows and changes right alongside our children. Valerie shares her own story of becoming a parent—the expectations, the surprises, the ways God has shaped her through motherhood, and why parenting is as much about our own transformation as it is our children's.

Whether you're expecting your first baby, in the thick of diapers, or simply wondering why parenting feels like it's constantly changing, this series will help you see the journey with fresh eyes. Join us as we explore what it means to become the parent God is forming you to be—one stage at a time.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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Every parent has moments they're proud of... and moments they'd rather pretend never happened. In this episode, we're sharing stories of fails, victories, and the moments that have kept us humble (and laughing).

We're also unpacking the idealized self—the imaginary parent who never loses their cool, always says the right thing, and never makes any mistakes. As it turns out, God has never asked us to be perfect but invites us into dependency on Him.

If you've ever wondered whether you're enough as a parent, this episode is a reminder that God's faithfulness has always been the real success story.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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In this episode, we're talking about the "dirty lens" we all carry into parenting—the thoughts and assumptions that color how we see our kids and ourselves. Stress has a funny way of smudging the glass. Suddenly your curious toddler looks "defiant," your emotional tween seems "dramatic," and you're convinced you're failing at this whole parenting thing.

The good news? You don't have to believe everything your stressed brain tells you.

We'll explore how our thinking shapes our stress, how stress shapes our parenting, and why renewing our minds isn't just good theology—it's good parenting. Together we'll learn to recognize the dirty lens, wipe it clean with God's truth, and see our children (and ourselves) with fresh eyes.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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In this episode, Val and Presley discuss the "summer cure"—that noticeable shift when children seem happier, more relaxed, and more like themselves once school is out and summer routines take over. From extra sunshine and outdoor play to less pressure and more freedom, we'll explore why summer can have such a positive impact on a child's mental and emotional well-being.

Summer is a time to seek both fun and growth in our relationships with each other and God. Join us as we dive into questions about what is summer revealing about your child's need and how to parent in the season of sunshine. 

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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As parents, we all want our children to see others the way God does, but how do we teach them to notice differences without fear, discomfort, or judgment? In this episode, we explore how diversity reflects God's creativity and design, and why helping our children recognize and appreciate differences is an important part of their spiritual and relational growth.

From navigating conversations about people who look, think, or live differently than we do, to modeling Christlike love and curiosity. Join us as we consider how parents can raise children who see every person as someone made in the image of God.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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In our newest and final episode in our series on development, we explore one of the most unexpected transitions in parenting: navigating life as parents of adult children. Together, we discuss the spiritual, relational, and psychological shifts that happen as our role changes from managing and guiding to supporting, trusting, and remaining connected in new ways.

We talk honestly about growth, boundaries, letting go while staying present, and how our own stories, fears, and expectations can shape these relationships. Through a Christian lens, we reflect on what it means to parent with wisdom, humility, grace, and hope while trusting God with both our children’s journeys and our own.

Whether you are parenting young adults, fully grown children, or preparing for this season ahead, this conversation offers encouragement, insight, and space for reflection as we consider how development continues for both children and parents across the lifespan.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

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The teenage years can feel like a constant push and pull—one moment your child needs you deeply, the next they’re pushing for independence. In this episode, we explore what it looks like to stay close enough to truly know your teen—their struggles, pressures, and questions—without holding so tightly that you hinder their growth into autonomy.

We talk about the delicate shift from hands-on parenting to intentional presence, where influence matters more than control. We also dive into the role of healthy spiritual community. We take an honest look at the ways teens cope with the weight of social pressure—what they may be turning to for escape, and how parents can respond with curiosity instead of fear. This episode invites you to remain a steady, connected anchor while giving your teen the space they need to become who God created them to be.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home

Send us Fan Mail

If you’ve ever felt like your once-sweet child has suddenly become a strong-willed, independent, opinionated human who’s slowly taking over your house, you’re not wrong.

The teen years can feel like a shift in power, a shift in connection, and honestly, sometimes a shift in sanity. But what if this “takeover” isn’t a problem to solve, but a process to understand?

In this episode, Presley and Val are diving into what’s really happening beneath the surface—physically, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually—as your teen steps into who God is creating them to be. We’ll talk about why they push away, why they question everything (including you), and how this stage is less about losing influence… and more about learning how to use it differently.

Because the goal isn’t to hold on tighter, but to stay connected while letting them grow.

So if you’re in the thick of eye rolls, big questions, and growing independence… this episode is for you.

CDC Milestone Tracker App: https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones-app/index.html

BabySparks - Developmental Tracker & Online Learning for Parents: https://babysparks.com/

Harvard's Center for the Developing Child: Three Core Concepts in Early Development: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/videos/three-core-concepts-in-early-development/

Building Social-Emotional Skills at Home: https://www.naeyc.org/our-work/families/building-social-emotional-skills-at-home