When you're trying to find inner peace with external metrics like the number of followers you have, your athletic ability, your grades or test scores, or your number of likes on an Instagram post, you'll feel insecure, in danger, and constantly lacking. You won't think clearly, you'll easily neglect your values and virtues, and you will allow a destructive story about who's on top to become your controlling narrative. 

Remember when we thought the majority of the stress and strain of the pandemic was behind us?

Well, now we're headed into summer and still carrying all of the stress and anxiety from the past two (plus) years.

As Charlie says in the episode, "In the past couple years, what we have seen is the amount of intensity and complexity in our world and our country go sky high. And when the amount of complexity and intensity goes sky high, our nervous systems feel that in the form of more fight energy (like anger, frustration, irritation), more flight energy (fear, worry, insecurity, anxiety), or more freezy energy (like overwhelm or collapse). "I don't want to do anything", they might say. They feel lethargic and have low energy. When we're talking about our kids, what we would expect is that their nervous systems are now having to process and deal with a massive increase in complexity and intensity."

About Charlie Ruce

Charlie Ruce, LMFT is a licensed therapist with extensive training in trauma and understanding how the autonomic nervous system reorganizes itself at higher and higher levels. Charlie’s primary training in this area comes from the model Organic Intelligence, founded by Steve Hoskinson. Charlie has been training with Steve since 2014. Using this understanding, Charlie has helped executives, small business owners and entrepreneurs heal their traumatic wounds and build their capacity to find more fulfillment and satisfaction in their personal and professional lives. Before starting his own coaching and counseling practice, Charlie spent 7 years working at the Soul Care House, a group therapy practice in San Diego. He also spent 2 years helping manage, train, and supervise the Soul Care House staff team as the Clinical Director. Charlie lives in San Diego with his wife Heather and their Great Dane Matilda.

To learn more and connect, go to charlieruce.com.

ABOUT SANAM CHARLTON

Sanam is a graduate of the University of Florida with degrees in Accounting and International Development and Humanitarian Assistance, with an MA from Mercer University in Early Childhood Education. From the beginning, she was well aware of her desire to make an impact within her community and therefore has spent most of her professional career working behind the scenes at various non-profit organizations that address economic and environmental challenges faced by communities. Additionally, Sanam spent over two years as an elementary school teacher, cultivating the minds of her students and nurturing their holistic selves. It was during her role as Operations Manager at The Honor Foundation that she discovered, with the support of her colleagues, her WHY: her purpose, inspiration, and passion.

As a first-generation college student, Sanam learned early on to be patient, persistent, and resourceful in order to forge her own path to success. She has a deep understanding of the importance of mentorship and the impact it can have on a person’s professional and personal life. She has always found purpose in helping others see what they are capable of so they can choose to find success and happiness in what they do.

As JIT’s Employment & Resource Managing Coordinator, Sanam is taking on responsibility for researching, communicating, and coordinating critical resources for the short and long-term employment success of our youth. This critical information and essential individual guidance will assist participants in obtaining meaningful employment, defining who they are as individuals, achieving financial stability and security, and cultivating relationships and connections to achieve their goals.

In her free time, Sanam enjoys reading and relaxing at the beach. She spends her weekends playing board games with her friends and scouting out new restaurants with her husband.

Accurate self-awareness is a foundation for health and wellbeing. It’s the basis for quality relationships, career satisfaction, effective leadership, and almost any worthy endeavor you can imagine. The people who lack self-awareness are typically the ones we try to avoid at all costs. You know the type- you probably work with one (or live with one). They aren’t aware of how they come across, they’re reluctant to own their mistakes, and they try to project a character of themselves that’s inauthentic. Self-awareness is available to every person, but it requires a commitment to pursue it. Can you imagine a well-lived life without it?

Unfortunately, it's rare to find a kid who goes through school and emerges more curious, passionate, and engaged in their learning than they started with. Sometimes it feels like an inevitable result. But does it have to be that way?

This week, we're excited to introduce you to Karen Elaine Rogers, an innovative educator who is hyper-focused on helping kids come alive through learning.

Karen Elaine Rogers teaches at Poway Unified's Connect Academy:
Connect Academy is a K-8 virtual school that provides an innovative approach to instruction, blending together the best elements of on-campus schooling and online education to offer families a flexible environment that is student-centered and future-focused. This unique design encourages students to explore Poway Unified curriculum with their interests and passions at the forefront while becoming a community of creative, collaborative, and empowered learners.

Unless a kid has been assessed for unique learning challenges or disabilities, they will have to survive in a one-size-fits-all model of learning. Good teachers will employ strategies to provide differentiated learning plans within a classroom using scaffolding techniques. They know students have different learning styles, and they do the best they can to offer the resources to adapt to those differences. But with large class sizes, fast-paced trimesters, a focus on testing, and ultra-competitive college admissions, not every student will get the opportunity to develop a love for learning, an awareness of their learning style, or have the time to pursue their curiosity.

That's a shame, to say the least.

If you can't cope with the system, you'll get left behind. If you can't hack it, you'll feel like something's wrong with you. Valerie Strauss, director of the scathing documentary The Race to Nowhere, talks about the unintended consequences of focusing exclusively on performance on test scores in a Washington Post article: “Even for those students who stick with it, tests degrade the educational experience, fueling performance anxiety and the false impression that academic success is about speed, accuracy and competition.”

For all the emphasis on testing, there are millions of kids who are being left behind, and millions more who meet the educational requirements but are missing out on actual learning.

Sir Ken Robinson (R.I.P.!) famously said in one of his TED talks, “The dropout crisis is just the tip of an iceberg. What it doesn't count are all the kids who are in school but are disengaged from it, who don't enjoy it, who don't get any real benefit from it.”

So what can we do, as adults involved in the education of kids?

When a kid is growing up, many receive the advice to pick a career that's practical. For others, their parents to find something that makes them happy. Either way, it's not easy.   

What does a kid do, though, when the options they see don't fit who they are or want to be? What kind of courage, foresight, and fortitude will they need to blaze their unique trail?  

This week, we invited Megan Kachigan to the show to be a breathing example of what resilience looks like. Megan has defied conventional wisdom, discovered what makes her tick and come alive, and established a career and family for herself that is as unique as it is impactful. And, it's not just for her, it's a life that anyone can learn from.  

About Megan

Megan Kachigan is an intentional copywriter and sales funnel strategist who gets more clicks and conversions for values-based coaches and course creators.   

As a Stanford University teaching award winner with a Masters in Education, Megan understands how to capture attention—and turn it into sales. Powerful results include:  

…writing the ads for a $250k launch.  

...crushing industry standards with a 56% open rate and 9% CTR on an email sequence.  

...helped drive over $1 million for clients with copywriting and strategy.   

Megan has gotten results for Two Comma Club Award Winners and Funnel Hacking Live speakers. She’s been featured on the Ambitious Mom podcast, the Star Coach Show, and She’s Building A Dream. Megan speaks about copy strategies that 7-figure earners use to make more sales and how to confidently increase your conversion rates quickly.  

Learn More About Megan 

megankachigan.com

There’s nothing worse than wanting something and finding out you can’t get it yet. It’s so, so tempting to just give up. Maybe you tried out for a team but got the news that you wouldn’t make the squad this year, but the coach encouraged you to keep training. Maybe you auditioned for a leading part but got Tree #2. Or maybe you really wanted to get an A in the midterm but struggled to get a C+.

Grit is a mixture of your passion and your persistence. It’s a long commitment to learning a skill, accomplishing a goal, or gaining an attribute- no matter what it takes or how long it takes. 

Hopefully, you’ve had the opportunity by now to earn some grit. Hopefully, you know what it’s like to dig deep and pursue something, even if it’s hard or takes a while. But even if you haven’t yet, don’t worry- there’s still time.

LEARNING FROM FAILURE: WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED FROM FAILURE?

Failing sucks, right? Especially when it’s public and other people know about it. Whether it’s missing the shot to lose the game, failing the test, getting busted for cheating, most of us try to avoid failure at all costs. A lot of times, our parents protect us from failing. They don’t want us to feel bad or to miss out.

But here’s the deal: if we don't fail, we’ll miss out on learning significant truths about life. 

We won't learn about persistence. We won't be able to discern what's actually most important. We won't be able to learn that our true worth comes from within, not from our reputation. We won't learn that we can handle hard things, and we will be predisposed to avoid taking risks. 

Once you learn to appreciate failure, the next time we’re freer to take the next shot, to bounce back from the D- and go to office hours, and own our mistakes to do better.

Diego Ugalde is a veteran with 15 years experience as a Navy SEAL. His career began in San Diego, CA in 1992 as a Hospital Corpsman in the hopes of becoming a SEAL but his plans unexpectedly changed when he was dropped four months into BUD/S training. After eight years of repentance over being unsuccessful, he trained his way back into shape. Despite separating his shoulder mid-way through, he was able to continue on and graduate with his Class 246. Diego was ultimately promoted to the rank of Senior Chief Petty Officer, served three combat tours in Iraq, participated in over 250 highly classified combat and Advanced Special Operations missions.

He is a gifted leader highly experienced in mentoring and training multifaceted and multicultural teams and organizations. Diego was awarded four Navy Commendation Medals (with Combat Valor), three Navy Achievement Medals and one combat action ribbon.

If we don't let kids fail, they won't learn significant truths about life.  They won't learn about persistence. They won't be able to discern what's most important. They won't be able to learn that their true worth comes from within, not from their reputation. They won't learn that they can handle hard things, and they will be predisposed to avoid taking risks.   

Inability to face, accept, or learn from failure is one of the most consistent critiques managers in today’s workplace have about the younger generations. Just the other day I was talking with two managers of a large global company who lamented how few risks their team members were willing to take. Whether it was speaking up in meetings or coming up with new initiatives, they consistently held back. One of them shared how she’d given honest feedback to a young employee, who instantly broke down crying and claimed she was being treated in a hostile manner.   

Life is going to be hard. No one’s going to escape setbacks, obstacles, or failure. If you do, it’s likely because you’re taking the path of least resistance and avoiding anything that might be uncomfortable. The workplace needs emerging talent to embrace and continuously lean into failure. There’s no better time to teach them this valuable life lesson than during adolescence.