Jason's 3rd grade fling was over when he ruined it with his state-ist views and bro-friendly material. Steve thought his partner would enjoy a "good" dead baby joke. Ask their spouses, things have not improved.

Steve's friend ruined Harry Potter for someone and got what he deserved. If you tell someone a beating is coming if they cross you, you're not being mean, you're teaching them integrity.

Steve's day (and chili) was ruined when he lost his chili mojo, Jason's chili was ruined when it was consumed before he could say goodbye, and movies can be ruined when the guy who makes the chili cheese fries is late. Don't ever be that guy (or us, really).

Steve ruined a nice, peaceful day on Snake River for pretty much everyone and thinks that blunt-force cranial trauma makes for a good, fun time. Jason ruins everything when he would rather not be on the water, thank you very much.

Steve ruins white trashhood by claiming but not being able to prove it, Jason ruins hot tubs and beers by enjoying them at the ballpark, and both guys agree on the best method to find the rich people at a sporting event.

Steve ruins invisible people sleepwalking into your bed, Jason argues that Ghostbusters 2 ruined ghostbusting for the Ghostbusters, and Steve returns to ruin car rides with his lethally-detestable jokes.

Jason had his night ruined by some invading dogs, Steve ruins the concept of doggy playdates, and both guys ruin polar bears (while also giving them a decent place to live).

Steve tries to ruin Dolly Parton for all of us, but her powers are stronger than that, everyone tried to ruin Elvira for Jason but his body hadn't matured yet, and both guys ruin lewd gestures for homeless roustabouts.

Jason ruins his family's day with stupid ideas and dangerous pratfalls while Steve ruins a girl's decolletage with his bee mind powers.

Jason ruins hills, as he thinks they are only good for dying on. Steve tells a tale of college years gone by, wherein he ruins satire by attempting it, early Internet times with his first pro-Transformers flame war, and possibly his own life, for which he would like 1,000 Bay Bucks. He also probably ruined the Transformers franchise.