Despite the fact that women have been socialized to be nice above all else, it's not actually a very noble goal, as my co-host this week, Terri Trespicio, breaks down today. Does that mean you should go out and let your a-hole flag fly? Or become outright mean? Goodness, no. It just means you set your sights on something different--something that takes a lot less energy than being nice AND that gives you more energy, because it's gratifying.

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