This Song Sucks

Positivity reigns in this super-sized bonus episode: These Songs Slap Vol. 2! Cole Smith joins Hayden and Josh to discuss "Mythological Beauty" by Big Thief and "Waltz No.2 (XO)" by Elliott Smith. Serious music analysis abounds in this episode, but the fellas somehow find a way to steer the conversation towards cheap beer and jalapeño poppers. Season 3 drops soon, so let this tide you over until then.

The boys are joined by Gabe Hostetler this week to take a trip back to middle school, which is about the time when people thought "It's Been Awhile" by Staind was a good song. This is a doozy of a season finale as all three of the fellas livd, laughd, and lovd mightily during the episode.

Much time is spent poking fun at the ripped-off Korn riffs of early Staind, but the hosts do eventually talk about "It's Been Awhile", coming to the conclusion that the song is just a gray, flavorless pile of slop.

Austin Lancaster joins Josh and Hayden to pick apart the karaoke favorite "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey. Does everyone love this song for some reason? Yes. Does that automatically make it good? Heck no.

Austin takes us into his past to explain why the song holds a particularly hated place in his heart, Josh unearths some questionable bass playing, and Hayden is pretty sure that Journey's manager was actually a cast member on Seinfeld.

The boys are joined by Soapy Jones this week for a discussion of one of her least favorite songs, "Pour Some Sugar on Me" by Def Leppard. Or is it by Motley Crüe? Does it even matter when the song sucks this much?

Soapy thinks that the entire song must have been recorded in an airplane hangar, Josh whips out the ol' axe to poke fun at the backing guitar, and Hayden asks what is probably the most important questions of our time: what the hell is Dokken?

Josh and Hayden get taken down a peg or two by this week's guest host, Natalie Morrow, as they discuss Billie Eilish's hit "Bad Guy." This one is sure to appeal those of you that aren't big fans of Josh or Hayden (i.e. most of you).

Josh stands alone on his island of criticism as Natalie chooses to enjoy the song for what it is and Hayden changes his mind about the song after seeing the music video. There is one thing they can all agree on though: ToeJam & Earl kicks ass.

Guest host Bo Hicks joins the boys this week to share in his hatred for Weezer's only top ten single "Beverly Hills." Don't worry Weezeheads: there's plenty of Pinkerton talk before the fellas start dunking on this Stinkerton of a song.

Bo (like many fans of early era Weezer) feels betrayed by this song, Hayden finds an odd comparison for the shitty guitar solo, and Josh finds an opportunity to talk about how much he hates the sound of children singing for the second week in a row.

Lindsay Palinsky returns to the podcast to rail against her least favorite song from her least favorite musical: "Tomorrow" from Annie. She brings along her good friend and fellow musical theater nerd Toby Singer to explain why this song, and the musical in it's entirety, just plain sucks.

Josh hates the awkward rhythms, Toby explains how this song has ruined the voices of many aspiring stars, and Lindsay adds some new vocabulary for describing one of Josh's least favorite sounds: children singing.

Old time buddy Cole Smith joins the pod this week to hate on Aerosmith's "Dude Looks Like a Lady." Even at 13 years old, Smitty knew this song sucked.

Josh hates the lazy ass horns, Steven Tyler's mouth noises ruin Hayden's weekend, and Cole takes the boys on several imaginative rides as he speculates on what was happening in the studio to make this band crank out the load of horseshit that is this song.

Blaine Duncan is back on the pod y'all! One of our favorite guest hosts returns to talk with Josh and Hayden about Hanson's super annoying hit "MmmBop."

Join the boys as they take a deep dive into suburban Tulsa to talk about the Hanson brothers' musical beginnings as well as their more recent cringe-worthy use of social media. Josh finds plenty of musical qualities in the song to hate, but Hayden and Blaine focus on the non-sensical lyrics. Blaine also reveals his favorite act from the 1996 Wisconsin State Fair.

Josh and Hayden are joined by guest host Hannah Hayes to discuss the veteran jam band Phish. Hannah hates these guys so much she couldn't pick just one song to dismantle, so her and the boys talk about "Chalk Dust Torture", "Tweezer", and "Suzy Greenberg."

Hayden tries desperately to defend the band while Josh blasts the band's incessant repetition and milquetoast grooves. Hannah draws from a vast array of food-based metaphors to make fun of the band, which of course drives Hayden towards one of his favorite topics: Guy Fieri. Stay tuned until the end to catch a dramatic reading of some spicy Phish/Fieri fan fiction. This episode doesn't just get off the rails: it blows up the daggum tracks.