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Welcome back to another brutally honest, hilarious, and slightly unhinged episode of This Stays Between Us! Today we’re diving into the viral TikTok trend that has us howling — people roasting their exes using brand slogans. Think: Gucci, because he wanted everyone's coochie. Yup, it's that kind of day.
But wait — it gets more personal.
We also spiral into all the things we learned way too late in life: how to use a curling iron without third-degree burns, why fabric softener isn’t laundry detergent, what car registration actually is (surprise! it’s yearly!), and the ongoing lesson that... people kind of suck sometimes (especially in hit-and-run situations).
From hilarious ex jokes to real-life oopsie moments, we reflect on how underprepared we were for adulthood — and how we’re surviving anyway. This is the episode you didn’t know you needed. It’s chaotic. It’s nostalgic. And it’s exactly what your group chat sounds like on a Tuesday night.
Highlights & Viral Brand Burns:
- Gucci: Because he wanted everyone’s coochie
- Hello Kitty: Because he said hello to every kitty
- Crumbl: Because he had a new one every week
- IKEA: Came in pieces and expected me to put him back together
- Lulu: Because I was D-Lulu
- ChatGPT: Confidently lying about things it doesn’t understand (just like your ex)
Key Takeaways:
- TikTok Trends Are Therapy: Humor really is healing. Roasting exes with brand slogans? 10/10 recommend.
- We Were Not Prepared for Adulthood: From gas station fails to car registration horror stories, we talk about the basic life skills we learned way too late.
- Don’t Trust a Guy Who Doesn’t Know Salt: One of us had to teach our man about seasoning food… in 2025. Send help.
- Some Lessons Hurt (Literally): Curling iron burns, fabric softener laundry cycles, and door-dashed band-aids — adulthood is painful and expensive.
- Trust = Broken: What happens when someone crashes into your car, gives you a fake number, and disappears? Oh, we’ve got stories.
Relatable Quotes You’ll Love:
“Netflix… because I shared him with five other girls and I was the only one paying.” “Dollar General, because he didn’t have a dollar. In general.” “I put diesel in a gas car because green means go — it made sense in my head!” “I thought fabric softener was detergent… for like a year. And yes, I smelled great.” “He discovered salt in 2025. SALT. Like, the basic human seasoning.”You’ll love this episode if you:
- Are addicted to TikTok trends and petty ex drama
- Were also thrown into adulthood without a user manual
- Still call your mom for help with insurance… and laundry
- Want to laugh at our trauma and share your own in the DMs
- Believe exes deserve to be dragged in brand form 💅
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Join the Inner Circle:
This episode of This Stays Between Us is your permission slip to laugh at your past self, drag your ex (gently), and bond over all the weird ways we learned how to be adults. Subscribe, leave us a review if you’ve ever used fabric softener as detergent, and send us your favorite brand roasts on tiktok @therealtsbu
We’ll be back next week with more unfiltered c