2years ago today Russ finished his last Radiation treatment. We look back at the fog we went through and coming out the other side. Thoughts from the Tractor

We wanted to take a moment to acknowledge all those who fought for our freedom & right to live the live we choose. Russ talks a bit about his grandpa & uncles. Thoughts from the Tractor.

Russ & I talk about what helps to see the light of the next day. How expressing our self & having support from friends & each other makes such a difference. Thoughts from the Tractor

***** Warning, this episode talks about Mental Health & feelings of Hopelessness.********. Russ & I discuss some triggers that happened to me & my feelings of being in a black hole & climbing out of it. The whole is getting smaller & I don’t go there very often, but when I do, it is painful, frustrating & scary. I find a safe spot to wait for the next sunrise & someone to breathe 1 breath at a time with. I don’t have to fix anything or be fixed….. just breathe. Thoughts from the tractor. *talk suicide Canada 1-833-456-4566

I have come to realize from Russ that work can be fun! We have done so much work around the farm lately, but I have actually enjoyed it! Life is too short not to have fun with what you are doing & being with who you want to be with! We are turning our work into pleasure & being happy with what we do! Thoughts from the Tractor.

How often do we say “to be honest”? Why would we say something to openly lie to each other. I think it is a funny saying. Russ & I talk about this and being open to “listen” to each other’s ideas. Thoughts from the Tractor.

Trevor & I get to have another conversation about us both growing up and some questions he has for me. We never leave anything unsaid to each other!

I was able to go to Vancouver Island to spend 4 days with 8 Women from “Pick my Brain.” I have learned so much from these amazing women & even after all this I still want to stay married to Russ!!! No words can describe the impact this weekend has had on us all, but this episode will hopefully provide you with a blips into connection and conversation we experienced. If you want to learn more you can connect with me on https://www.pickmybrain.world/profiles/brenda-pelland-mcintosh/

I got to spend 24hours with Trevor! We decided to do a podcast about the way he was raised & his perception of life!

We just had my 40th High school Grad reunion. It was amazing!!!!!! We also are learning not to assume someone is too busy to get together, or they don’t need a call! Pick up the phone, have that visit, send a letter, make time to make the memories! Thoughts from the Tractor