A short song I wrote about the monster munch crisps as a love song I did it whilst riding aboard a train the 11.34 from Bicester to London Marylebone station 12.38 recorded in two takes outside McDonald's in double quick time.

The British boarding schools were without doubt what built the British Empire, anyone subjected to this kind of cruelty or brutal treatment could easily subjugate a sufferance over someone else especially another nationality or creed which the British empire managed to achieve for a few hundred years each school had peculiar traits, Eton for instance use to be famous for its flage fridays where in the library boys would be placed onto a specially constructed birching block and duly thrashed. out my latest episode!

A little tune i wrote for James who's very devout in his religion each Sunday we usually have a long discussion with him trying to convert me to his Christianity and me remaining with my humble hallowed humanity both of us respectful of each others theistic thoughts.

A short song about some one who has decided to live on two packets of rolos per day to loose weight.

a song I wrote for a friend of mine who seems obsessed with living on a diet of twiglets to lose weight

A song I wrote about taking your wedding vows which my father did back in 1959 the preacher boomed blood and fire brimstone as if God himself were speaking which sobered him up from his stag night slake .

Checa short song I wrote and sang whilst on the Birmingham to Bristol train 11.42 to13.14 not a bad effort I sang it in the station car park the builders had stopped for lunch they thought I'd gone mad but two takes and it was done.

A quick song I wrote about Florence nightingale the woman they used to called the Lady with The Lamp or The Angel in White.

If ever you should take a drink with a witch make sure you leave the very same night before the break of day or the dawn of light by which time you might just find yourself in a very unfortunate plight of being subjected to her JuJu cat's emasculation bite that leaves you as some sort of strangely sculptured hermaphrodite .

A short song I wrote about owning a car in the swinging sixties which was extremely rare especially for young people but if it was a jaguar then you were the nouveau rich make believe millionaires the fake faux movie stars members of my family and their friends were just this usually their balloons burst into bankruptcy debt and divorce, too much money in young hands its like mixing desire together with hell fire . All rights reserved