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All I can say is that when times are hard, and she ain't taking kindly to me, desperate matters required a desperate act.  An act with was both tactical and strategic.   I had a plan, and God was understanding, and I to this day believe He played a hand on the whole timing of things.  What are the odds, that on the day I decided to take up the offer of: "if you're ever down this way, stop by."  Well hell, that's a dang open-invite from where I'm from. 
Well, as fate would have it, that on this particular day, the Italian Grandparents and the Sicilian Godfather of my lovely wife would be there the day I decided to impose myself for a visit.
Never in my mind did I believe this wasn't going sit well with Laura.  I confess to say, "Dang, I didn't see that coming."  Oh well, it all worked out, and I sure do miss her Granddaddy.  

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As a young knuckle-head, I made a many mistakes.  And I'd say 100% of the undesirable outcome was on account of me not thinking things through.  Not knowing how to apply critical thinking, use logic, which really equates to me have little wisdom or experience at being an adult.  In other words, me unaware of "cause and effect."  The laws of unintended consequences.  Me not asking; "what could possibly go wrong."  That sort of stuff.  
Well sure nough, I made the tactical error of what was supposed to be a practical joke in class one day, and in an attempt to get a laugh in class didn't go well in the slightest.  It went South, and it went South fast.  
Instantly I felt like crap, and instantly I wanted to take it back.  But like Daddy said, "you can't unscramble a scrambled egg."  Or, "when you jumped off the porch, you're off the porch."
I can ever say I'm sorry enough to Mr. Jack.  He is a good man, and I was a punk that day.   

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Being a young new Sailor, and being from Butler GA meant I had to experience a learning curve often a common course of a naïve country boy.  As we were raised to believe most folks are good and honest, and stealing was equal to having sex with your sister,.....you just don't do that.
Well, I learned a great deal those first few months in the Navy attending school at Naval Air Technical Training Center (NATTC), Millington TN.  I learned that there were indeed thieving scumbags that will stealing and destroy your things.  I learned that no matter what a person says, or how they act, it can be a front to set you up to let your guard down.  I learned to "lock your locker" meant to ALWAYS lock your locker. 
And as a result of making less than $450.00 a month, and recovering from a thief roommate, I discovered that one call go downtown and sell a pint of blood for a whopping ten bucks.  And more importantly was, they wrote the record in pencil, which meant I could eat a lot of food and go sell another pint.  Hell, it was like  having a part time job.  Bottom line, a pint of blood money can ease the financial pain to the next payday.  If Mama only knew. 

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I miss many things.  I miss being young, carefree, and the unaware feeling of not knowing and not caring about stuff that didn't matter.  The days of utter freedom of just being a boy, a kid, and learning by the school of hard knocks.  Playgrounds, and backyards.  Hours upon hours of just me and my BB Gun in the woods.    I recall watching a movie about this man traveling across states by riding a small lawn mower towing a trailer to go see his brother that was dying.  And at some point during his trip, he encountered a group of young men (bicyclist) out on the open roads, and they passed him like he was standing still.  They hollowed and chanted as they blew by him.  Well later that evening, that old man on the mower come upon a place to make camp for the night, and sure-nough all the fellas on them bicycles were there.  The old man pitched his tent, had fire and was sitting with his supper when a few of them young fellas came over.  The old man was sharing some thoughts, and telling his story, when one young fella spoke and said: "hey old man, what's the worst part of getting old?"  And the old man replied,....."remembering what it was like to be young."

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Again, me being young and stupid is indeed a major part of my past.  I've done a many of things I regret, and saying sorry doesn't begin to repair the damage.  I can't explain what it feels like to sew oats if you will, but the hormones of a young fella are powerful, and can cause one to lose all good sense.  Yes sir, I went off and did the unthinkable and cause pain that I'm now ashamed of.  I don't know which was worse, Mama's wrath or the butt chewing that Mrs. Sarah gave me at the Exxon Station one evening.  Whatever the case, they both were warranted and I most certainly deserved it.  What was I thinking, and the point is, I wasn't.  But to hear me tell, Daddy got a show, Mama didn't speak to me for weeks, and Steve and I ran off one night to Laurens South Carolina for only one reason.  

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Being young and stupid presents a many of opportunities to get beat up, arrested, and worse, killed.  I have come to the conclusion I am indeed one of the luckiest people alive on this planet.  In retrospect (20/20), I had all the opportunities to fail big-time.  So, what could possibly go wrong at 1;00 AM in a Krystle's Restaurant on the Southside of Macon GA off Hwy 41 after a night of drinking at Whiskey River?  Well, believe me I tell you,.....one can come damn near to get shot.  It was all fun and games until Jimmy flipped a spoon of grits at his "urban" cowboy, and his dang girlfriend force him to protect his man-card, whereby resulted in us in a dark parking lot ready to fight.  Yep, the sound of a pump shotgun being racked is NOT the sound one wishes to hear trying to crawl out of a backseat.  But is the sound to make one stay in the car.  Thank goodness Jimmy was a good bluffer.   If Mama only knew.  

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Summer time brought many things to a young boy growing up in the South in the 1970's.  Getting the heck out of school was indeed at the top, but the flipside was me having to get up earlier in the mornings to go with Daddy to work at the Grocery store.  Truth be told, summer time meant hard work and long hours.  But summer time also meant 4H Camp.  And to attend 4H Camp at Rock Eagle was beyond fun.  The excitement and challenges were life lessons that I'm grateful for.  I learned many things about my Buddies, me, and yes,....girls.  And in hindsight, I see that Vernon Reddish and Jim Willis deserve medals.  I learned how to pack lots of shaving cream and toothpaste without Mama knowing.  A lot has changed since then, and I'm sad to report that Political correctness (a.k.a. Woke) has taken away what was once a great opportunity for young folks to team building and how to be competitive. 

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A simple "in-and-out" trip to the Dentist.  What could possibly go wrong?   Tune in to this episode to hear me tell it.

I'm guessing today with all the modern medical technology that's evolved, it would be darn near impossible to get an x-ray image backwards, whereby setting the stage for a Dentist to attempt to yank-out the wrong tooth.  Well, back in 1981, this wasn't the case, and an up-and-coming young US Navy Dentist made the error of reading the x-ray backwards, thus was set on working on the wrong side of my mouth.  And to make matters worse, the Pharmacy gave me someone else's meds, but gave me comfort that at least I wasn't gonna get infected. 

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In 1976 the small town of Butler Georgia was overrun with Blackbirds, and when I say overrun, I mean millions of them critters.  It didn't take long before the local town folk done had enough of the noise and bird crap, thus someone on the City Council decided to purchase all the shotguns shells in the surrounding area, and give them away to anyone who came to town with a shotgun.  Now of course the plan was to rid the town of these birds.  All I can say is, that as a young boy having watched to Alfred Hitchcock movie "The Birds,"  I believed I was giving payback for them birds attacking that pretty lady and her pet birds, and for damn sure them fellers at the gas pump and the youngin's running out of that old schoolhouse.  The end results that day were:  hot gun barrels, sore shoulders, a mess of dead birds and shells about the ground, and a many of families ate Blackbird Pie that evening.