To (Mom) Life

Summary: This week's guest is Rebekah Saltzman who is the founder of Balagan Be Gone. Balagan Be Gone helps women live their best life by curating a collection of their best stuff. In this week's episode, Rebekah and Jodi address why it is so important to declutter your life, how to handle both children and husband decluttering, and Rebekah’s 36 decluttering challenge.
About Our Guest: Rebekah holds a degree in fashion design from Parsons School of Design, and for many years worked as a graphic designer. Rebekah’s passion for the environment and helping people improve their lives drove her to change careers and create Balagan Be Gone.  A native of Silver Spring, Maryland, Rebekah lives with her husband and three children in Israel.

Show Notes:

5:24 Why is it so Important to Declutter?
More possessions, more worry. If you have too much stuff, you end up working for your stuff instead of your stuff working for you.

8:10 How Do You Balance Getting Rid of Stuff and Depriving our Children of Things They May Want?

I don't think your kids necessarily notice how much they have or don't have. I'm not saying necessarily get rid of all your toys. I'm saying think about how many you actually need to have.

12:14 How to Declutter Kid's Artwork, Pictures, and Workbooks.

I definitely talk about this in my new book coming out...what I always used to do with my kids was I gave them each a drawer, and at the end of each day, that's where they would put their artwork. And I would take a picture of them holding their artwork for the week.

16:15 Practical Tips on How to Get Rid of Stuff. 

It's gonna take time for you to feel comfortable having less, so you don't have to do it all at once. You can go slow. But pick a reasonable number, and start to weed out the things that don't serve you anymore. 

20:07 What Do you Recommend in Terms of Husbands?

 Don't throw out other people's stuff. Gently prompt them to go through their stuff later on. But you got to be patient with them.

22:05 Rebekah  36 Day Challenge

What I designed was this 36 Passover challenge that actually ends the Sunday before Passover. I go through the whole house with you in 15 to 30 minute daily challenges that go straight to your inbox, they're designed to be short and get you started on the decluttering train. 

27:42 “Organize Jewish Life” and Rebekah Planner
I wrote it when my mom passed away in 2020. Because even though I had prepared myself by reading about how to sit Shiva when I actually needed to sit Shiva, I didn't know how to do it. …and as I was writing the checklist out, I'm like, Whoa, I need to make this into like everything Jewish.  So I decided to make it all into one large book called organized Jewish life.
Connect with Rebekah Saltzman:

Email: [email protected] 

Instagram: @balaganbegone 

Website

Rebekah’s Gift: It's All About Time Management” Course for ONLY $36 with promo code MAMA. Sign up here for a free consult call: https://www.facebook.com/BalaganBeGone/ 

Painless Pesach Challenge

Organize Jewish Life Planner

Email Jodi at: [email protected]

Credits:

Host: Jodi Fried

Guest: Rebekah Saltzman

Editor: Autumn Michels & Max Suib

Summary: 
In this episode, Jodi Speaks with Debra David about how to meal plan, individualized meal templates for each family, the benefits of meal planning and how to involve your family in the process. 

About Our Guest: 
Debra David is a Time Management Coach who helps women manage and organize their time and plan their hectic schedules. Her passion is helping mothers create calm in their lives in order to be the best wives and mothers for their families. Debra, who grew up in New Jersey, has been living in Jerusalem with her family for the past 16 years.    

Show Notes: 
1:33 Life Coach and mother of 8
“In the past I worked as a life coach and then I focussed on my kids and now I’m helping women plan their meals for the week and customize it for each one.” 

2:15 What is meal planning?
“Meal planning is basically planning out your week by making a customized chart that works for you and your family. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, it just has to work for you. Having this chart up there on the kitchen cabinet or fridge helps you know what you’ll be making.”

3:17 Individualized meal templates
“Templates that I have are very individualized based on each family.” 

5:09 Benefits of meal planning 
“One of the most stressful questions that our kids ask us is ‘what’s for dinner?’ and when we have an answer ahead of time it’s great. The best benefit is having a plan. Because we have a plan, we can prepare ahead to defrost or have all the ingredients.”  

7:30 Simplifies food shopping
“It makes food shopping easier because you know what you’ll need and some women even tell me that they spend less money on food because they’ve planned ahead.”

9:07 How do we meal plan?
“Make a list of all of the meals that your family likes and then ask other people what meals work really well for their family and then decide what meals are easy, simple, quick and healthy meals for your family. We want to take the pressure off of ourselves.” 

11:20 Meal planning templates 
“Depending on your schedule, maybe Wednesday needs to be a more simple meal and then on Thursday you have more time so you can make something a little bit more complicated.”  

12:50 Involving your family
“Make sure that at every meal that there is at least one thing  that each child likes. The templates have notes too so if your husband is making something or an older child is making a side dish.” 

15:40 Picky Eaters
“Without any pressure, without anyone feeling bad, there can be another option of eating cereal and milk or something simple that they can eat if they don’t like the main meal.” 

17:55 What to do food wise when the unexpected happens 
“I like to suggest having a plan in your head of what to do on the unexpected days such as having a meal ready to go in the freezer. It eliminates the panicky feeling of not having a meal planned.”  

19:25 Shopping list
“Whenever I see that we finish the peanut butter or something, I add it to the shopping list that is already on the fridge. As soon as we write it down, it’s out of our head and it’s easier to handle.”

21:07 Lessening stress
“Take a minute to slow down and implement a habit that can help you. It could be having a notepad on the fridge.”  

Painless Pesach Challenge: 
bitly.com/painless2022

Organized Jewish Life Planner:
https:/amzn.to/3uZs8cJ 

Email Debra David:
[email protected] 

Email Jodi:
[email protected]

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Debra David
Editor: Gabrielle Topping and Iris Nelson

Summary: In this episode, Jodi Speaks with Kathryn Greenberg Wilcox who is a Mindfulness expert from Sarasota, FL. While Kathryn may not be a biological mother, she considers the many individuals that she works with within her community to be as if they are her own children. Kathryn believes in “family by choice” and that a mother is not necessarily defined by genetics. Tune in to hear Jodi & Kathryn discuss an array of topics surrounding the mindfulness field including: why mindfulness is a must in everyday life, the power of breathing, and how to teach your children mindfulness.

About Our Guest:  Kathryn Greenberg Wilcox is a mindfulness maven who has worked in educational settings with children and adults using Mindfulness based practices. Among her accomplishments is a life-skills course she developed for women in jail designed to help them choose effectively, reduce recidivism, and engage in a Life Worth Living.  

Show Notes:
2:17 Why is Mindfulness a must in everyday life? 
“So much of what we’re seeing today especially with the addiction epidemic and just general dysregulation is that children especially, but really all humans, need to learn to regulate their emotions” 

4:05 Mindfulness without meditation?
“The idea of mindfulness and meditation is to do one thing at a time, with your mind, body, and spirit” 

 6:10 The power of YOUR breath
“Sometimes people get flustered, and they say, “I can’t breathe” but my response is: if you can talk, you can breathe. So, be mindful that you can breathe but when it’s shallow and rapid it may feel that way and then the emotions kick in, making you feel overwhelmed...” 

 10:28 Your children and mindfulness 
“Children seek attention, right? So we are very good at labels. Parents might think “Well, this is attention seeking behavior” and if you sort of shift that and change that to connection seeking or relationship seeking, watch how their perspective shifts” 

 11:45 Mindfulness Through the Pandemic
“Kids are not going to remember specific things about this virus, they’ll remember the energy in the house, the feelings that came in the house, and so they are going to watch you and they are going to learn from you. So, be aware that you have the chance to wire them for resiliency, rather than panic, rather than stress or concern…”

13:03 Treating your child’s emotions mindfully   
“A lot of parenting is tolerating and sitting with your children when they have these big emotions that are completely overwhelming..so when you're sitting with your child who may be struggling or is overwhelmed, and you may be as well, let that child know that it is okay to feel however you are feeling…”

17:32 Mindfulness to overcome adversity 
“I’ve been through 7 treatment centers, I’ve struggled with a suicide attempt and lots of years of self harm and when I walked out of my last treatment center, I said “that’s it, this is it for me, today is the day things are going to shift and I made that choice and I make that choice every single day to live.”

Connect with Kathryn Wilcox:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kak.greenberg
Website: alifeworthliving.life  
Email Jodi at: [email protected] 

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Kathryn Greenberg Wilcox
Editor: Autumn Michels & Max Suib 

In this episode, Jodi chats with Dr. Lilach Saperstein, who is an Audiologist that lives in Israel. Dr. Saperstein has a podcast called The All About Audiology Podcast, which just recently celebrated its 3 year anniversary!  In this episode, Dr. Saperstein shares some of her expertise on children who are deaf and Hard of Hearing. The two discuss how you can help your child be aware and sensitive to their peers whose hearing is different than theirs and how one can promote such inclusivity within your parenting styles. Motherhood is complicated enough as it is and this episode works to demystify disability, so you can act confidently and better understand the needs of those who are Hard of Hearing.

About Our Guest:
Dr. Lilach Saperstein is an audiologist and parent educator working with families of deaf and hard of hearing children to integrate their emotional journey with information and resources. Dr. Saperstein is the host of the All About Audiology podcast, which has been downloaded over 50,000 times, offering personal interviews related to audiology, communication, parenting, connection and advocacy. She received her doctorate of audiology from the CUNY Graduate Center in New York in 2017. She is also an instructor at Touro College. Dr. Saperstein lives in Israel, where she and her husband are raising three bilingual daughters.

Show Notes:
2:42 The basics of parenting a child who is deaf or Hard of Hearing
“I’ve found that when parents come to me, or they find [my] podcast, it’s often because they’re frantically trying to get resources, information, and connections. It’s something that’s not as common as most other diagnoses … this is something that’s a little farther removed and can be really isolating for the family.”

7:08 How can we promote inclusivity for children who are Hard of Hearing?
“Everybody needs to Google one particular word, that is: ableism. If you have not heard this word, it’s time to get educated on it.”

14:29 The importance of inclusivity
“As we get older we get to understand each other and celebrate each other, and we learn how to understand what’s best for one another.”

19:09 Staying aware of potential hearing difficulties in your children
“Yes, go to the audiologist, but you wanna make sure you’re going to someone that tests children.”

Connect with Dr. Lilach Saperstein:
Podcast

Retreat sign up:
allaboutaudiology.com/retreat

Membership work:
https://drlilach.teachable.com/p/connect-advocate

Facebook
Instagram

Email Jodi at:
[email protected]

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Dr. Lilach Saperstein
Editors: Iris Nelson and Gabrielle Topping

Episode 78: In this episode, Jodi meets Ayelet Schwell from Birth Your Biz. Jodi and Ayelet Schwell speak about how mothers can find purpose and seek help adjusting back to their normal routine after giving birth. Ayelet specifically talks about how dignity, respect, and autonomy are concepts to focus on when going out in the world and finding your “why.” 

About Our Guest:

Ayelet Schwell is a doula, speaker, and educator for mothers and birth professionals. She is the Founder of Healing Her Birth Services and Creator of the Birthing Our Stories Workshop and has used her experience, knowledge, and intuition to guide mothers as they create their own positive, powerful birth stories. As a mom of 6, wife, and business owner, she gets by on baby snuggles, coffee, and sci-fi novels.

Show Notes:

3:37 Importance of one's “why” in life, inspired by Simon Sinek’s book “Start with Why.”
“Because my passion is birth, specifically birthing women have a right to autonomy and dignity and respect in their birth care and their perinatal care, that's my “why” that my mission.

10:03 The implications of finding one’s “why” as a mother
“I want my children to know that, that they can, that they should, that they can and they should demand their own autonomy, and to be treated with respect and dignity in their lives” 

12:40 Process of figuring out your “why.”
“If you start to think about the patterns in your life, of the things that you do, the things that bring you joy, the things that light you up, the things that break your heart and the things you want to change the world. That's what's going to start to let you know what it is” 

14:00 Finding one's “Why” outside of being a Jewish mom
“Jewish Moms say ‘my purpose is to build a Beit Naman B’Yisrael  and to raise Jewish children and to give them a basis of Torah. {...} And that's great that that should be all our purposes, but like, try to go deeper” 

16:12 Ayelet Schwell’s “Why”
“The thing I'm fighting for, in this world, is every woman's right to autonomy, dignity and respect in their birth care. And that's why I have to teach the doulas because if they're not doing their thing, and connecting with the people who need them, then the women are not getting the autonomy and dignity and respect that they need in their first year”

19:08 The implications of understanding one's birth story
“Yeah, but I don't know what to do with all these feelings. That's what processing can help with. And there are a few different modalities than the one that I created”

Here is Ayelet's workbook:
https://birthyour.biz/who-needs-you-most-training/   

Email Jodi at:
[email protected]

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Ayelet Schwell
Editor: Autumn Michels & Max Suib

In this episode, Jodi speaks with Alyssa Wolf from yourunbusylife. The two discuss how to get your kid/s to clean their room. Alyssa shares practical tricks and tips to help you encourage your child regarding how to clean up without much fuss or stress. This way, you can teach your child basic responsibilities and also have them help YOU by taking on some responsibility around the house. Alright ladies, this episode will teach you how to let your kids help you and it could change your life!

Alyssa Wolff is a minimalism junky, introvert, bookworm, mom of 5, and productivity coach at yourunbusylife who helps moms be 'unbusy'. She is a mom to 5 and has her own podcast.

2:55 What goes on in a child’s head when they refuse to clean up
“Immediately they take a look at the room and they kind of go into brain freeze. ‘What do I pick first? I can start here, here, here, here, and they don't seem to have the cognitive maturity yet to just say, Okay, eat the elephant one bite at a time. Just grab one thing, put it away’ 

4:30: Ways to help your child overcome the overwhelm and naturally clean their rooms
“We have to double down and do the hard part right now because they think that doing the chores is the tough part. But we know better. It's keeping up and training and explaining and saying no, I'm not letting you get away with that. These are the rules and you're required to pay”

7:15 How to help your child compartmentalize cleaning up
“Three and under, I am down on the ground with them … as they get older, I start standing further off. I might stay in the room as the monitor … the nine or 10 year old, you can say I want you to pick up that set and that set. You can go off and leave them to it because they shouldn't be responsible enough”

8:30 Dos and Don'ts of cleaning up

9:40: When a child is defiant or too tired to clean up
“If they're just yawning their heads off, I'm gonna say go to bed.”

11:30 Different organizational methods of cleaning up
There are 4 main ways that one organizes based upon personality. Find your child’s preferred organizational style and follow suit.

19:00 Siblings who have different levels of organizational responsibility
“Ask each child sometimes by themselves … what chores they like best”

25:30: Little and easy tasks that a child can do to take some relief off of us

Get in touch with Alyssa here:
Email: [email protected]
Website: https://yourunbusylife.com/

Book Alyssa mentions in this episode:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08RW4KTP9/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Alyssa Wolff
Editor: Matt Feiler

In this episode, Jodi meets Rena Reiser, and the two discuss the power behind using a bottom up approach to handling stress and overwhelm, along with learning how to use what’s called the felt sense to listen and pay attention to the signs your body is telling you.

About Our Guest:
Rena Reiser is a facilitator of Mind-Body (Focusing) Sessions and Embodied Dance. She helps women tune into their inner wisdom to create lasting change. Download her free Tune In Journal at www.tuneinjournal.com.

Show Notes:
6:01 What is the Bottom Up Approach?
“Our bodies, throughout the day, are constantly giving us signs of how we’re feeling, a sense we’re getting about life… but we don’t always pay attention to what’s going on inside.’” (7:23)

9:37 Utilizing the Felt Sense
“I checked in with that short, shallow breath… and as I sat with it, it just became this sense of overwhelm… for me it was so clear: just sit with this overwhelm, that’s what you’re feeling right now, and let that overwhelm be there.’” (11:21)

13:21 Asking questions to your stress
“What are you feeling right now? Why are you feeling this way? What made you feel this way? Sometimes the ‘why’ doesn’t ask the question enough that it’s able to respond.’” (14:02)

14:23 Answers from your stress
“When it doesn’t answer, that’s a sign that… there’s something that’s preventing the overwhelm from being able to respond, so let’s get curious and find out ‘what’s that thing?’ What does it want to say to us? What does it want to share with us?’” (14:34)

16:12 What holds us back
“So a lot of things like perfectionism tend to come up, of wanting quick solutions, wanting to be able to be there already, wherever ‘there’ is.’” (16:48)

18:13 The first step
“[The Felt Sense] is not just there. People think, ‘Oh, I have a backache,’ or ‘I have a headache.’ That we know. We want to know what’s beneath that, we want to get to know it even deeper.” (18:52)

20:21 The main takeaway
“There are so many more feminine approaches to how we can give to ourselves on a day-to-day basis that I think we owe to ourselves and our families to really give that to ourselves.’” (21:47)

Connect with Rena:
Website

Email Jodi at:
[email protected]

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Rena Reiser
Editor: Rae Pavlat

In this episode, Jodi presents a talk at the #MyTellihimTime Women’s Virtual Festival held by Abraham’s Legacy, an organization that seeks to empower Jewish women everywhere. Jodi discusses the impact regarding the loss of her cousin, later delving into the cornerstones of motherhood and what it truly means to protect one’s children.

Credits:
Speaker: Jodi Fried
Editor: Rae Pavlat
Special Thanks: Abraham’s Legacy

In this episode, Jodi has a candid discussion with an entrepreneur, business mentor and mother of three children with special needs and learning differences, Maayan Bobylev, and the two discuss how to navigate these learning differences and play them to the children’s strengths rather than treating them like a weakness.

Show Notes:
4:55 Early signs of learning differences
“When we placed [my daughter] in school, right away there were some social skill things […] Every parent-teacher conference, it was like, you know, ‘there’s issues with attention, there’s issues with not talking, those sorts of things…’” (6:28)

11:30 Handling the hurt
“I really felt like I was doing my all, and to get the feedback that this is a kid who has severe ADHD and is not getting support, immediately what came up for me was just shame, and ‘How could I have missed that?’” (12:53)

15:11 Releasing the blame
“It definitely helped me to connect with either a parenting coach or someone that you trust and can talk to, to share the feelings that come up.” (15:41)

17:29 Difficult decision-making
“There was a lot of processing and releasing, and trusting that Hashem [...] created my kids exactly with the strengths and the weaknesses and the challenges that they’re meant to have, and he entrusted me to support them and advocate for them..” (18:32)

20:37 Advice for Jewish parents
“When it comes to Jewish learning and instilling a love of Hashem […] that boils down to what they learn at home anyways. We don’t rely on the school to teach that.” (20:59)

22:27 Advocating Effectively
“The challenging piece has been taking ownership of advocating for [my children], not putting that on the teachers or the schools or pediatrician, but really knowing that the absolute best person to advocate for your child is you.” (23:05)

28:41 Self-Care
“I go on a couple walks every week with friends, and it’s knocking out two things at once: exercise, and deep conversations and connection with growth-oriented women that I love.” (29:26)

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Maayan Bobylev
Editor: Rae Pavlat

Have you ever wondered what life has been like for our host over the course of her life? In this episode, Jodi recalls the times that she stepped out of her comfort zone and opened her heart to new opportunities, and why that’s a good idea for all women and/or mothers out there. She also invites you to take the first steps to embrace your vision with prompts and direction for this meaningful writing activity. 

Connect with Jodi:
http://loveadventuremom.com/

Email Jodi at:
[email protected]

Get on the Waitlist for the Next Embrace My Vision Workshop:
loveadventuremom.com/vision

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Editor: Rae Pavlat