To (Mom) Life

All the time, you find yourself worrying about things you can’t control: your spouse’s feelings, your kids’ feelings, your income or finances, et cetera. If this is you, you may want to take a step back and think about you: who are you? Are you the person you want to be? In this episode, Jodi discusses the power of self love and boundaries—which, yes, is a form of self love!—with author and public speaker Chany Rosengarten.

About Our Guest:
Chany G. Rosengarten takes women who are struggling with real pain in their marriage, to living in peace, power and connection. While many people try to help couples by bringing them together on the same page- something that results in fireworks and pain when there's been trauma, distrust or animosity in a relationship, Chany helps couples by building up one member of the partnership at a time. This is so powerful that most women who work with Chany report that not only are they happier than they ever were, and not only did they find their purpose, passion and peace, but their husband typically says, "what have you been doing? Because whatever it is, I'm in love with who you are''. Chany has helped over one hundred women directly change their marriage or other significant family relationships. She is the author of the book The Boundary Is You, and she is a wife and mother to four beautiful children ages 14-3.

Connect with Chany: [email protected]

Show Notes:

3:00 Addressing the elephant in the room
“Having tried to fix all the little problems […] at some point I realized that in all of these things, there’s one central theme, and that is: I don’t like myself. And when I realized that, that’s where the real work began…” (4:01)

5:14 Avoiding the tendency to blame others
“I was resentful at my baby, and I knew that there was something in that equation that didn’t make sense. But who was I to blame, myself? [laughter]” (5:45)

8:12 Who are you?
“Even just ‘who are you in this situation’ is enough of a question to say […] What do you say about this? What do you need? What are you bringing to the table, and can we tolerate that?” (9:05)

9:40 Practical tools to get to yourself
“The basic idea is get to the answer of, or get to the question of: who are you, and the next question is: what do I want?” (10:59)

11:11 The boundaries of yourself
“For me, understanding the boundary is me means I have permission to want what I want. I have permission to create the life that I want. It spills over naturally into my other relationships.” (12:46)

14:25 The LAND method
“L is for Loving yourself […] the A is for Authority and Autonomy […] the N is Negotiation […] and finally, [D is for] Direction.” (14:47)

17:43 How it’s all connected
“Women are very powerful, and a lot of women don’t know that. I want women to have a good life where they’re shining, where they’re taken care of, where they feel at peace, where they feel safe and secure.” (18:26)

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Chany Rosengarten
Editor: Rae Pavlat

Discussing puberty and the changes that happen to one’s body, known in layman’s terms as “The Talk,” can be a difficult conversation to have with your child. With that said, it doesn’t have to be as rocky as  you may think. In this episode, Jodi talks with certified sex therapist and psychologist Dr. Shy Krug to  discuss how to keep an open dialogue with your child, how to set a safe space for discussions early on,  and when it’s time to have that conversation. 

Show Notes: 

5:00 Accessibility to the Internet and its risks 
“At a really young age, you really have the entire world of information at the palm of your hand, which means you are now within reach to basically anything.”

8:01 Keeping an open dialogue with your son 
“…You need to have the foundational dialogue and relationship there in the first place. So I think, first  and foremost, is how do you tend to the relationship?”

11:13 Setting a safe space early on 
“When a child is four, five, six, seven years old, you’re able to start having more of a substantive,  interactive relationship with the child, that continues to evolve…” 

16:34 When and how to have “The Talk” 
“Are we using anatomically correct language when we’re talking to a toddler about their anatomy and  their physiology? We’re creating […] this culture of open dialogue…” 

21:06 It’s never too late 
“There’s always room in relationships and in life to find improvements for things and to work on things and develop and take into [account] your values.”

22:08 Advice for yeshiva education and co-education 
“Just because you have those two different educational styles does not inherently mean they’re exposed to different information.”

25:55 Agenda-driven curiosity versus non-agenda-driven curiosity 
“Some parents will interrogate their kids: ‘Where are you going tonight?’ ‘Who are you spending time  with?’ […] They’re trying to maintain a sense of control.” 

27:45 The balance between masculinity and vulnerability 
“Your vulnerability can actually show you what’s important to you. It’s highlighting for you what  matters to you.” (32:23)

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Dr. Shy Krug
Editors: Maximus Quirino and Rae Valtapaz

Today Jodi speaks with Robin Meyerson, regarding loss. Robin speaks about what its like to become a parent when you, yourself lost a parent growing up, when to start talking with children about the loss of grandparents, and how kids can honor and remember their loved ones. Tune into to receive some practical support and finds way to allow your child/ren to process the memories of those who are no longer with them. 

Robin Davina Meyerson is a life coach, activist, motivational speaker, teacher and author. She is the founder of Project Inspire Arizona, and director of NASCK.  

Learn more about Robin and her work at these links:
May the Neshama Have an Aliyah Teachers Manual
Peacefulreturn.org
Project Inspire Arizona

6:24: Becoming a parent when you, yourself lost a parent growing up
"First of all we just want to listen to the person [...] and have them express and share their memories and talk it out and just sit and listen"

8:18: When to start talking with children about the loss of grandparents
"Making it appear to the child, because it's the truth, that the afterlife is real, that grandma and grandpa are watching and they can maintain a spiritual connection with them..."

14:17: How kids can honor and remember their loved ones that are gone

17:57: Ways of helping your child when they have lost someone special
"It also depends on the age of the child, if the child is a teenager then certainly you can have a pretty in depth conversation with a teenager and explain to them the rule of Shiva..."

21:29: Creating family projects to remember the loved ones that have passed away

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Editors: Iris Nelson and Orlando Diaz

In this solo episode of To (Mom) Life, Jodi walks us through ways moms can feel more full and confident in day-to-day life. The FGB Mindset gives a new perspective on the daily pressures that can frequently take place in our lives. With Jodi’s personal and general examples, you can walk away with a fresh understanding of a new tool to help your mental health and general attitude toward your family and friends. 


* Jodi’s new program called: Journeys Mentorship for Jewish Women will begin in January! Listen in to today’s episode for details. If you're at all interested in joining, visit her page to book a call for a life-changing experience!

Show Notes: 

00:48: Journey’s Mentorship for Jewish Moms

“This program is for growth-oriented mommas who want to let go of the overwhelm, inadequacy, and self-doubt in your life…”

04:03: What is the FGB Mindset?

“There are three parts to it. F is for flexibility, G is for growth and B is for bonding.”

Connect with Jodi:
Website
Email
Instagram

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Editors: Ilyana Castillo and Isabel Leyva

One of the most demanding aspects of motherhood is leading by example. How can you find that balance between raising children and empowering yourself all at the same time? How can you find enough confidence in yourself to then pass on to your children? Who better to answer these questions than this week’s guest Liba Yoffe? Together, Jodi and Liba discuss the importance of empowering oneself and what you can do to set both you and your children up for self-fulfillment and confidence, even in the face of adversity.

About Our Guest:

I am the last person anyone expected would be a CEO of a company. 

I’m Liba. Mom of four, living in Arizona and CEO of Spirit Fit Life. SFL is my brainchild. I created this platform in order to help women worldwide be the leaders of their own lives. At SFL, we coach women on how to build strength from the inside out; to be the leaders of their lives, minds and careers. SFL has changed the lives of hundreds of women around the world. We’re the ONLY program that delivers such a high level program for women, promoting their inner strength and leadership in fitness, holistic nutrition, self growth, business coaching, leadership, pre and postnatal programs and more. Managing my team, impacting hundreds of women around the globe… It's really crazy! But ASK me how SFL has become a booming company so fast that makes such a massive impact? The answer is pure drive and a passion to make a MASSIVE impact on women’s lives.

Show Notes:

5:55 Finding a balance between motherhood and empowering oneself

“I knew that in order to raise a confident daughter, I needed to be fully confident within myself to really be that example for her.”

8:01 Reconciling confidence and modesty

10:42 Helping your children feel comfortable in athletics

“Embody what you’re trying to encourage in your daughter. If you want her to go on a run, go on a run with her. Whole her that you’re doing it too, in a skirt, with your hair covered, whatever it takes.”

15:41 Instilling self-confidence in your children when facing adversity

“We have this organization called Hairoes, we hold events for kids with alopecia and we have support groups for the parents, and we started that because we saw how many parents were so distraught and whatever the parents thought, that’s what the kids thought.”

18:37 Finding confidence within yourself so you can pass it on your children

“As moms it’s so important to know that while we care so much about our children and we’ll go fight for them, if we go and do that, we also have to do that for ourselves.”

More From Liba:
Instagram
Facebook
"'American Ninja Warrior' Liba Yoffe Is 'Small But Mighty'"

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Liba Yoffe
Editors: Iris Nelson and Maximus Quirino

In this episode, Jodi and guest Dr. Samantha Rasekh discuss dental health and it's importance for new moms. Dr. Rasekh provides insight into successfully taking care of your teeth and finding a practice that works for you while also easing worries about what dental work can be done while pregnant.

Show Notes:

4:28: Why is dental health so important? 

"Obviously, for your own health. You want your mouth to be healthy. You don't want to be in pain."

5:46: How to successfully take care of your teeth while pregnant

"Oftentimes, when I see pregnant patients, and they need work, I have the conversation with them, of whether it's best for them to put it off until they deliver or if it's something that we want to try do during their third trimester when it's the safest time to do it."

7:29: Going to the dentist with a newborn

"I think finding in general, a team that's going to work with you and your limitations is really important."

9:42: Finding a practice that works for YOU

"I think it's the same as when you're finding any, whether you're finding your OBGYN or finding your pediatrician, your friends experiences are going to be the most reliable source of information."

11:34: Potential consequences of putting off dental care

"Those things that are minor, that would have just been a filling... end up being much more major. You're in pain or the cavity is so big that it can't just be fixed with a filling."

12:36: Clarifying mouth myths

"I would ask to maybe wear two lead aprons instead of one lead apron and really minimize what I need. But you definitely can safely have necessary X rays while you're pregnant."

16:55: Communication between your dentist and OBGYN

"It's pretty standard within dentistry that the dentist will speak to your physician."

18:56: Asking questions and advocating for yourself

"But I think really asking, not necessarily saying 'I don't want this,' but saying, 'Is this safe? Is this necessary? Would it be possible for me to speak to the doctor before I do it?'"

23:43: Dental health and insurance coverage

"If you're on some sort of subsidized health program, it is worth looking into what kind of additional dental insurance you have while you're pregnant and really utilizing those benefits while you're pregnant."

Contact Dr. Rasekh:
Facebook: Samantha Rasekh
Email: [email protected]

Credits:
Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Samantha Rasekh
Editors: Isabel Leyva and Ilyana Castillo

What are eating disorders? What are the signs? How do parents help their children recover? In this episode, Jodi and guest Temimah Zucker discuss the answers to these questions and more, including the differences between eating disorders and disordered eating, how to address the topic using the proper language and the next steps for healing. 

About Our Guest:

Temimah Zucker, LCSW, works with individuals ages 14 and older in New York and New Jersey (virtually at this time) struggling with mental health concerns, and specializes in working with those looking to heal their relationships between their bodies and souls. Temimah is an adjunct professor at the Wurzweiler School of Social Work and a Metro-NY supervisor at Monte Nido. To learn more or to reach her, please visit www.temimah.com or @temimahzuckerlcsw on Instagram.

Show Notes:

7:43: Disordered Eating vs. Eating Disorders

"Ironically, it's sort of a fun fact, people probably think most of eating disorders and they think of anorexia.  And that's actually the least prevalent eating disorder.  The most common is what's called other specified feeding and eating disorders, which is kind of like a mix of different symptoms."

11:50: How to Identify the Signs of an Eating Disorder

"One of the most common misconceptions is you can tell if someone has an eating disorder by how they look. That's completely not true. Even people with raging cases of anorexia nervosa could be at a weight that is quote, unquote, like average or higher than average."

18:13: Purging Behaviors

"You know, like, movement is great movement is beautiful. But it shouldn't be about compensating for what you're eating."

19:13: How to Address Eating Disorders and Next Steps

 "So that's just like preventative, but also being mindful, forever, kind of going forward.  How we talk to ourselves really, really is heard by our kids."

22:13: How to Use the Proper Language

"So starting off with just very caring, neutral language, meaning, I'm noticing this change has been happening recently. Can you tell me more about what's going on?"

25:13: Navigating Resistance to Therapy

"Your goal does not have to be I want to like, get through this. The goal could be like, I want my parents leave me alone. I can help you do that. But only if you show up."

27:43: Last Pieces of Advice

 "It has to be equal parts, like addressing the emotional needs of the person, and how this is really just a symptom of whatever it is they're going through. But also knowing that like you, you have to address it behaviorally too."

Connect with Temimah Zucker, LCSW:
Website
Instagram

Credits:

Host: Jodi Fried
Guest: Temimah Zucker
Editors: Iris Nelson and Ilyana Castillo

Every now and then, siblings tend to have a little bit of healthy competition. However, what can YOU as a parent do when fights amongst siblings get out of control? Additionally, how can you work through intense rivalry together as a family? In this episode, Jodi talks with Dr. Aviva Goldstein, a counselor whose work stems from positive psychology, parenting, child & adolescent development. They dive into sibling relationships, what causes sibling rivalry, and why helping children deal with heated moments is vital to their development.

About our Guest: Dr. Aviva Goldstein is an educator, lecturer, and family counselor with a private practice based in Jerusalem. She occupies the space where the worlds of positive psychology, parenting, child & adolescent development, and Judaism come together. The common thread throughout her work is the desire to bring research findings and insights about children to the people who raise them. 

Show Notes:

6:37: Causes of Sibling Rivalry

“I think the vast majority of siblings fight because it fills some kind of need … they’re doing it for a reason, it doesn’t usually come out of nowhere.”

12:09: Fostering the Relationship Between Siblings

“Helping kids realize that there is no competition … every parent has enough love for their child.”

19:52: What to Say to Kids After Acting Out

“It’s almost never the moment to fix it when those emotions are still supercharged.”

25:26: The Importance of Working Through Fights

“One of the gifts we can give our kids is not telling them ‘don’t fight’. It’s teaching them how to deal with those moments.”

28:03: When To Get Help and Advice

“Anytime you feel out of your league, ask someone for help.”

Credits:

Host: Jodi Freid

Guest: Dr. Aviva Goldstein

Editors: Maximus Quirino & Isabel Leyva

Connect With Dr. Aviva:

AvivaGoldstein.com

FB @DrAvivaG

IG @DrAvivaGoldstein

[email protected]

While Kegels during pregnancy can be important, in today's episode we learn that pelvic floor health goes WAY beyond that. The pelvic floor is one of the more commonly neglected parts of our body, yet affects us so deeply, which is why it is incredibly important to know when to reach out to a pelvic floor physical therapist, regardless of age or gender.  In this episode, Jodi and her guest- Dr. Riva Preil discuss all-things-pelvic floor including when to seek physical therapy and what to ask a PT. 

About Our Guest:

Dr. Riva Preil, PT, DPT, WCS, BCB-PMD, CLT is a pelvic floor physical therapist with a passion for pelvic health. She treats women, men, and children with various pelvic floor disorders at Revitalize Physical Therapy, her private practice in New York City. She is certified in various modalities, including biofeedback, lymphedema, and craniosacral therapy to help her patients achieve their goals. Riva is a board-certified in Women's Clinical Specialist (WCS) through the American Physical Therapy Association. She blogs regularly, lectures to physicians, students, and the lay community, and constantly seeks opportunities to further her education and share knowledge with others. She recently started a YouTube channel called Pelvic Pearls to help educate others on this very important specialty. 

Show Notes:

6:15: What is the pelvic floor?

“The pelvic floor is a group of muscles that rests at the bottom of the core…”

7:31: Types of pelvic floor dysfunctions and treatments

“So when we think of the pelvic floor muscles there are two opposite ends of the spectrum where dysfunction can exist. On one end, there’s under-activity or weakness… the opposite end of the spectrum is when there’s overactivity or tightness of the pelvic floor muscles.”

15:47: The importance of postpartum physical therapy

“I am a big believer that it is a part of the body that deserves to have some attention and rehabilitation after pregnancy, labor, delivery… It’s easy to let your own needs slip through the cracks, but sometimes it only takes a few sessions of physical therapy.”

23:17: Questions to ask a Physical Therapist

“ I think that patients have the right to interview their therapists before they decide… it’s really important to feel that they are clinically knowledgable.. but also from a rapport perspective, that they’re patient, that they make you feel comfortable…”

25:43: Pelvic floor advice for pregnant women

“First before telling any pregnant women ‘do kegels’… you want to make sure that there is no history of pain… I actually do have a prenatal stretching program on my Youtube channel called ‘Pelvic Pearls’.”

28:57: A Special Offer from Dr. Riva Preil

Great idea! I am happy to offer a 10% discount off of the initial evaluation (first session) for anyone who hears about me through the show and reaches out within one month.

Connect with Dr. Riva Preil:

Email
Website
Instagram
Facebook
LinkedIn
Youtube

Credits:

Host: Jodi Freid

Guest: Dr. Riva Preil

Editors: Ilyana Castillo and Isabel Leyva

While learning Torah with your children is a truly special experience, it can also become quite challenging. What does it mean for a child to learn Torah and what can you teach them that’s unique from what they’re already learning in school? In this episode, Jodi and her guest - Chana Kupetz break down this process and discuss how you and your children can get the best out of your time together as you learn Torah.

About Our Guest:

Chana Kupetz is the Children’s and Families Program Manager at Hadar. Prior to her work at Hadar, Chana taught Hebrew and Judaic Studies in Washington, DC and in Minneapolis. Chana lives in Washington, DC with her wife Avi Strausberg and their two children.

Sign up for Devash magazine at hadar.org/devash

Show Notes:

5:14 What does it mean for a child to learn Torah?

“Sometimes, especially as kids go into schools, it feels like Jewish education sort of shifts and falls more into the role of schools… I know a lot of parents who’ve said ‘I have the knowledge and I can teach my kid, but still I’m paying for a tutor because something in the relationship just isn’t working. But still I think learning Torah with our kids can be really really special.’”

8:50 The challenges of learning Torah with children

“So much of the time, we feel like we’re in the role of disciplinarian and we don’t want Torah to feel that way… It’s just something we really love doing that we wanna do together.”

13:06 How to approach learning Torah with your children (Take it Easy)

“Don’t think of it as ‘I’m teaching my child Torah,’ but rather ‘I’m learning with my child.’”

20:35 Devash Magazine: making Torah learning sweet

“Make this magazine your own! Take what you like, we just want to provide exciting and really engaging Torah for kids and for families to learn together.”

Credits:

Host: Jodi Fried

Guest: Chana Kupetz

Editors: Iris Nelson and Maximus Quirino