Tracks

Tracks

By Mark CBHMusic
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Tracks episodes

  • Drowning Dreams - Piano Acoustic
    The things behind this song are a bit too personal to go into detail here, so I'll just say: This is a song I wrote about how short-term gratification will always be at the expense of long-term life goals and dreams.
    LYRICS
    I love this
    This numbness
    There’s nothing
    Above this
    This gluttony
    Starts subtly
    Then consumes
    Me utterly
    Here with the lost
    The lost and the blind
    I’m exhausted, confined
    I’m complete I am mine
    My dreams were drowned
    I held them down
    Forced them under till they choked
    And struggled while I joked
    My dreams were drowned
    My dreams were drowned
    Yeah
    This is not the man I’m meant to be
    This is not the man I’m meant to be
    This is not
    This is not
    A weakness
    For sweetness
    So tragic
    So needless
    Stick to the lies
    The lies the deception
    That hide this obsession
    That I never mention
    My dreams were drowned
    I held them down
    Forced them under till they choked
    And struggled while I joked
    My dreams were drowned
    My dreams were drowned
    Yeah
    This most beautiful gift
    The gift of time
    I smashed it all up
    So it cannot be mine
    Kept my anaesthetic dose up
    And all that pathetic hope up
    While I waste and waste and waste
    This most beautiful gift
    The gift of time
    This is not the man I’m meant to be
    This is not the man I’m meant to be
    This is not
    This is not
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Website: https://www.markcbh.com
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    3 min
  • Needy - Guitar Version
    This song was written in July 2025; this video is a stripped back version played just on Yamaha Pacifica electric guitar with vocals.
    The vocal mic is a good ol' Shure SM58 and the processing / mixing was done in Logic Pro.
    I think you can tell that I'm less rehearsed performing this version than the piano version [ https://youtu.be/ZhJRtfS_Fwc ] but I wanted to upload it anyway. Who cares?
    LYRICS
    My god what’s this?
    My gutlessness
    It knows no bounds
    It makes no sounds
    Just silent me
    Anxiety
    Chokes down each wish
    Strangled, dismissed
    Give in
    Capitulate a bit
    Give up your dreams
    Give up your dreams
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    It’s my duty
    Does this to me
    A noiseless drum
    An empty gun
    A plastic man
    Is what I am
    No force, no drive
    No more alive
    Resign, concede
    Don’t take the lead
    Regret and grieve
    Regret and grieve
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    Approve approve!
    Can’t think, can’t move
    Can’t stand, can’t sit
    Permit permit!
    Please validate
    Please validate
    Apparently
    This is my fate
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    It’s all just been a waste of time
    Oh no
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Website: https://www.markcbh.com
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min
  • Needy - Piano Acoustic
    What happens when you’re always too needy in a relationship? Is being needy sabotaging the relationship you’re trying to keep going?
    This song is about being needy, being too much of a people pleaser, and what it can mean for your relationships. It’s a song about always having to check in with the other person before you do anything. Sure, it may start out as a very gallant and considerate attitude but as time goes on, it’s likely that you actually come to resent the fact that when you act this way, it stops you from doing the things YOU want to do.
    More than this, setting unrealistic expectations in your partner’s mind about your level of commitment means that THEY never get used to dealing with or compromising with YOUR wishes, and so you can end up in a relationship that only reflects the desires and wishes of one of the people.
    That can lead to a lot of resentment, and this song is about that - It’s about realising that being needy and over-pleasing has created a relationship that doesn’t feel like home for you, and it’s about realising that you are still powerless to stop it. It’s a song about regrets in relationships.
    That’s pretty deep for 4 minutes of music. Maybe I’m over-thinking it.
    LYRICS
    My god what’s this
    My gutlessness
    It knows no bounds
    It makes no sounds
    Just silent me
    Anxiety
    Chokes down each wish
    Strangled, dismissed
    Give in
    Capitulate a bit
    Give up your dreams
    Give up your dreams
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Give up
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    It’s my duty
    Does this to me
    A noiseless drum
    An empty gun
    A plastic man
    Is what I am
    No force no drive
    No more alive
    Resign, concede
    Don’t take the lead
    Regret and grieve
    Regret and grieve
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Regret
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    Approve approve!
    Can’t think, can’t move
    Can’t stand, can’t sit
    Permit permit!
    Please validate
    Please validate
    Apparently
    This is my fate
    Again again again
    Every single time
    Again again again
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    This life’s no good
    This life’s not mine
    It’s all just been a waste of time
    Oh no
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Website: https://www.markcbh.com
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min
  • Good Enough - Live Version
    This is me recording a rehearsal of my Live Set version of this song.
    It's interesting how at this faster tempo the song comes across as quite angry and slightly erratic, whereas the slowed down piano and guitar versions sound quite sad (check my other tracks for these).
    Anyway, here's my running through my live version, mistakes and all. How many errors can YOU count? 😆
    LYRICS
    From far above the frozen sea
    D’you think you’ll ever notice me?
    As I give myself constantly
    Kept overkeen, kept feverish
    But keep devout, keep faith in this
    Transfixed upon a deeper wish
    ..I wasn’t here
    Wish I wasn’t here
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    No matter what I say
    No matter what I do
    Can’t give enough
    To keep this love
    Not good enough for you
    Acceptance meant much more to me
    Than fairness or stability
    So now what’s left is killing me
    Humiliation has its price
    Intoxication has its vice
    This situation, is it nice?
    …is overrated
    Nice is overrated
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    I hide myself in shadows I find
    I keep my own needs outta my mind
    Completely always totally blind
    To all the
    Things that I need
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Website: https://www.markcbh.com
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min
  • Good Enough - Guitar Acoustic
    This song was originally written as a fairly quick kind of post-punk dance number, fairly high bpm.
    Then a weird thing started happening whenever I would practise it or even perform it out and about, slowed down and acoustic - on piano or guitar.
    It was only then that the real emotion and nature of the song started to come through. Which just goes to show, even if you write the song yourself you don't necessarily know how it will sound best yourself.
    Here's my slowed down guitar-only version. I think it really allows the nature of it to come through.
    LYRICS
    From far above the frozen sea
    D’you think you’ll ever notice me?
    As I give myself constantly
    Kept overkeen, kept feverish
    But keep devout, keep faith in this
    Transfixed upon a deeper wish
    ..I wasn’t here
    Wish I wasn’t here
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    No matter what I say
    No matter what I do
    Can’t give enough
    To keep this love
    Not good enough for you
    Acceptance meant much more to me
    Than fairness or stability
    So now what’s left is killing me
    Humiliation has its price
    Intoxication has its vice
    This situation, is it nice?
    …is overrated
    Nice is overrated
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    I hide myself in shadows I find
    I keep my own needs outta my mind
    Completely always totally blind
    To all the
    Things that I need
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    Words and music Copyright (C) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    3 min
  • Good Enough - Piano Acoustic
    This song is kind of about having two conflicting states of mind that are constantly fighting with one another, and maybe even causing each other.
    On the one hand, it's about being an over-pleaser, and going flat out to try and satisfy and impress another person, but being resentful that they don't notice or appreciate your frantic efforts.
    The other side of the song is that in doing this, you actually end up putting your own needs last and pretending that you want what they want.
    The underlying question of the song is this: Do you attract people who are hard to please, because you yourself need to feel worthless?
    Who knows.
    Anyway, here are the lyrics. Go figure.
    LYRICS
    From far above the frozen sea
    D’you think you’ll ever notice me?
    As I give myself constantly
    Kept overkeen, kept feverish
    But keep devout, keep faith in this
    Transfixed upon a deeper wish
    ..I wasn’t here
    Wish I wasn’t here
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    No matter what I say
    No matter what I do
    Can’t give enough
    To keep this love
    Not good enough for you
    Acceptance meant much more to me
    Than fairness or stability
    So now what’s left is killing me
    Humiliation has its price
    Intoxication has its vice
    This situation, is it nice?
    …is overrated
    Nice is overrated
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    I hide myself in shadows I find
    I keep my own needs outta my mind
    Completely always totally blind
    To all the
    Things that I need
    No matter what I do
    No matter how I try
    Not brave enough
    Or cool or tough
    Not good enough, am I?
    Words and music Copyright (C) 2025 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    4 min
  • This Sabotage - Live Version
    Coming to terms with the fact that you're always hating on yourself when you make even the smallest tiniest of mistakes, even when there's nobody around to see it? In fact, ESPECIALLY when there's nobody around to see it.
    Uh huh. Me too. Here's a song all about it.
    LYRICS
    Consumed with fatigue
    So far out my league
    And all cos I stupidly think
    I’m unique
    Perpetual neglect
    Of my self-respect
    Has taken its toll
    Well, what did I expect?
    Take more blame
    Ignore shame
    But look what I...
    I became
    I became
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Guess what?
    With burnout
    It actually turns out
    The catalyst right at its heart
    Is self-doubt
    Uncomfortably numb
    Is what I’ve become
    After beating myself
    Like some infinite drum
    Diagnosis
    Psychosis
    Losing my mind
    Just focus
    Just focus!
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    For you
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2024 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    4 min
  • This Sabotage - Guitar Acoustic
    If I could give my younger self just one piece of advice it would be this: Look after your self-respect.
    Why? For a couple of reasons.
    Firstly because if you don't look after it, when the time comes for you to actually need it, it won't be anywhere to be found.
    The second reason is because when you don't have self-respect, all the ways in which you criticise yourself and put yourself down will all add up in your own mental image of yourself, and this is not healthy at all.
    In the end it just leads to burnout and self-loathing, and it all starts from the smallest of seeds. Somebody put this unkind voice in your head - it wasn't you - but when you let it stay there and you never fight back, you're setting yourself up for a pretty crappy ride, mentally speaking.
    So.
    Look after your self-respect.
    x
    Here's the song...
    LYRICS
    Consumed with fatigue
    So far out my league
    And all cos I stupidly think
    I’m unique
    Perpetual neglect
    Of my self-respect
    Has taken its toll
    Well, what did I expect?
    Take more blame
    Ignore shame
    But look what I...
    I became
    I became
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Guess what?
    With burnout
    It actually turns out
    The catalyst right at its heart
    Is self-doubt
    Uncomfortably numb
    Is what I’ve become
    After beating myself
    Like some infinite drum
    Diagnosis
    Psychosis
    Losing my mind
    Just focus
    Just focus!
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2024 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min
  • This Sabotage [live rehearsal]
    Recording of a live rehearsal, mistakes n all.
    A song about how I self-sabotage all the time, discouraging myself and giving myself a hard time, and I pretend it's all in the name of self-improvement. It isn't.
    LYRICS
    Consumed with fatigue
    So far out my league
    And all cos I stupidly think
    I’m unique
    Perpetual neglect
    Of my self-respect
    Has taken its toll
    Well, what did I expect?
    Take more blame
    Ignore shame
    But look what I...
    I became
    I became
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Guess what?
    With burnout
    It actually turns out
    The catalyst right at its heart
    Is self-doubt
    Uncomfortably numb
    Is what I’ve become
    After beating myself
    Like some infinite drum
    Diagnosis
    Psychosis
    Losing my mind
    Just focus
    Just focus!
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2024 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min
  • This Sabotage - Live Acoustic Version
    I wrote this song because I was so sick of burning myself out, trying to perfect literally EVERYTHING and giving myself all kinds of sh💩t if I fell short at all, ever.
    I used to pretend to myself that this was all some form of self-improvement until one day I realised that it was in fact a form of self-sabotage. So, I wrote this song.
    LYRICS
    Consumed with fatigue
    So far out my league
    And all cos I stupidly think
    I’m unique
    Perpetual neglect
    Of my self-respect
    Has taken its toll
    Well, what did I expect?
    Take more blame
    Ignore shame
    But look what I...
    I became
    I became
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Guess what?
    With burnout
    It actually turns out
    The catalyst right at its heart
    Is self-doubt
    Uncomfortably numb
    Is what I’ve become
    After beating myself
    Like some infinite drum
    Diagnosis
    Psychosis
    Losing my mind
    Just focus
    Just focus!
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    This sabotage
    These habits are
    A social form of camouflage
    Learning to hate myself
    To curse and berate myself
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    Feigning incognisance
    Of praises and compliments
    Just to get good
    Just to get better
    For you
    For you
    Music & Lyrics Copyright (c) 2024 Mark CBH
    Lyrics reproduced with permission
    Contact / sync: [email protected]
    4 min

About Tracks

From the publisher's feed

Writing these songs is cheaper than therapy. Unless you count all the guitars and plugins and stuff.