Tinseltown MUA Nova Kaplan visits the studio to discuss tiktok makeup trends such as: pumpkin girl makeup, cloud makeup, faux freckles, red carpet looks, and stage makeup, while giving Chelsea a "Latte Girl" beat. Chelsea tries to get her barky dog to bark and learns he is no show-pony. A caller pretends she has old skin. A lass with mild eczema on her knuckles shares her girlfriend's harrowing medical tale. A gent is mysteriously cured of Psoriasis. Famous dermatologist Dr. Emma dishes on bot flies and her gory skin disorder series "Save My Skin." She compares cutting open boils and cysts to unboxing videos. Immediately thereafter Ojai Bakestress Emily Alben penetrates Chelsea's mouth with 3 types of LEMONY DESSERT!!! Chelsea erroneously whitesplains hot sauce! Etc. Plus: slammin' new music cues from the iheart vault! 
 
Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free and early access to bonus content: https://apple.co/callchelseaperetti See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

TRENDS, AFFLICTIONS, BAKED GOODS

Beloved comedian Chelsea Peretti takes calls on weekly themed episodes, interacts with callers, and plays special music and sound effects. Lots of discussion of bear attacks, fixation on minutia, and administration of food tests.

Comedy

Chelsea chats about robot overlords then makes several half-hearted attempts at guided visualizations with largely disinterested callers who probably have Aphantasia. An overlong discussion of B12. Salad talk. A celebration of Kojak’s songs. Comment section outrage. Sweet tooth snacks. Protein. A brown recluse cameo featuring tunneling necrotic flesh.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

DELETE THIS PODCAST / “GREAT” “EP”

Concord's own Blake Anderson is in studio for a high-octane, alarming ep in which we learn that Aphantasia, though it affects 1% of the population, affects 95% of CCP callers. Harrowing updates on a past ep's attack mini poodle and Chelsea's Blokudoku score. A hyper, coffee-fueled, spooky consortium on coyotes, mountain lions, work passwords, airports, Cycle Yanks, and rabies. Chelsea chases another Pullitzer in her deep dive investigative journalism around key words: "Virginia" and 'dogs" and introduces the show's first SuperGavel(tm). Some food tests. Episode culminates in a super-taster test strip tasting.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

APHANTASIA, MOIST FLESH, DAMPFRANCISCO & SUPER TASTERS

Chelsea has garish accidentally purple eyebrows and hosts comedy genius Roisin Canarty. As Chelsea squints for invisible subtitles that never come, she learns about claggy foods, sliding fruit, and the best mascara. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A ROIS BY ANY OTHER NAME

A very bay ep with one of chelseas jr high school besties, a dr w a phd in theology and impeccable penmanship, Sarai Crain comes to the show. Songs! A discussion of being silly as a survival mechanism in 7th and 8th grades, shy roasters, crimped bangs, perms, rayon as a dominant textile, starter jackets, used leggings. Chelsea learns that many of her callers used to be emo. Chelsea as a failed blond. A callers Brazilian Petroleum fail and a teachers “sounds naive” in red ink. DJP caller ! First time drunk. Oysters / mussels / spengers. Chelsea learns she has mispronounced Appalachian her whole life. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

KEEP IT TRUCKIN

Chelsea is interviewed by a strange and largely benevolent robot in this very special episode. With her directorial debut "First Time Female Director" out on Roku, a PMSing Chelsea takes a sudden philosophical interest in the world of criticism and review culture, envies scientists, mourns for Wendy Williams, explores the most polite way to say one has to go to the bathroom, and learns about pillow weight gain. Caller "Golden Tickets" and the first "Ozempic Food Test" are introduced. Longtime podcaster, first time crying on podcast
podcaster. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

TRENDS, AFFLICTIONS, BAKED GOODS

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