Twisting the Plot

Get ready for something different.

Cindy Gallop doesn't do status quo.

After years as a leader and change-maker in the advertising business she has moved on to new projects.

At 61, Cindy shares that her life course is guided by a series of serendipitous accidents. Her current accidental mission is to help us all learn about, explore and talk about…sex.

MakeLoveNotPorn aims to help us all uncover our sexual potential. Cindy explains that there are two coincidental issues preventing us from knowing who we can be as sexual beings. First, we live in a society where sex is never discussed. Second, the porn industry is bigger and more accessible than ever. Hence, what we know about sex is taught to us by porn. It leaves most of us confused, unsatisfied, and missing out. MakeLoveNotPorn is a platform that invites real people to show real sex, in all its diversity. It aims to dispel myths, bash stereotypes, and free us all physically, emotionally and intimately.

It's a provocative topic. It's a bold business.

Cindy shakes us up and makes us think.

It's a plot twist for all.

Learn more about Cindy at cindygallop.com

Check out makelovenotporn.tv

When we think about women's invisibility over 50, we rarely consider women's bodies in their purest form, naked. We have been taught to look away with shame, fear, even disgust. This week, we spoke with photographer Jocelyn Lee about her new book Sovereign.

Throughout her career, Jocelyn has been photographing women in the nude, documenting how the body and our sense of ourselves changes throughout our lives. Sovereign is a collection of portraits depicting women age 55 and up. These women, captured naked in natural settings, reveal the beauty, sensuality, and strength of older women made visible.

Listen as Jocelyn talks with us about what she has learned from her work.

Sovereign seeks to shine a bright light on the natural beauty of women of all ages and all body types. No body is deserving of invisibility and I believe this work marks a long overdue paradigm shift. It's time we revolutionize the image world and flood it with women in real bodies, feeling sensual and wonderful in their human skin.

— Jocelyn Lee 2020

Check out Sovereign at jocelynleestudio.com

Buy Sovereign at minormattersbooks.com

Nikki Giovanni has a gift for making the everyday extraordinary.

She is an American poet, commentator, activist and educator. She has published multiple poetry anthologies, children's books and spoken word recordings. In the 1960's she was dubbed "the poet of the black revolution." She was an activist in the civil rights movement and an inspiration for the Black Arts movement. She has won 7 NAACP Image awards, the Langston Hughes Medal, and was the first recipient of the Rosa Parks Woman of Courage Award.

In the 1970's Nikki produced and made several appearances on the television program Soul!, where she engaged in a memorable dialogue with James Baldwin. She has taught writing and literature at Queens College, Rutgers and Ohio State, and is now the University Distinguished Professor of English at Virginia Tech.

We are so, so fortunate to have Nikki on our Twisting the Plot Podcast. We could have talked together for hours. Conversations with Nikki are like poetry itself. Multiple meanings exude from each word she speaks. She's a wordsmith, a storyteller, and a wise guide. And she lets her imagination run free. She thinks growing older is a good idea.

She reads from her most recent book, Make Me Rain.

Make Me Rain

make me rain

turn me into a snowflake

let me rest

on your tongue

make me a piece of ice

so I can cool you

let me be the cloud

that embraces you

or the quilt

that gets you dry

snuggle close

listen to me sing

on the windowsill

make me rain

on you

Check out Nikki's website at www.nikki-giovanni.com

Read some more of Nikki's poems at poetryfoundation.org

Buy Make Me Rain: Poems and Prose by Nikki Giovanni on Amazon

When the pandemic hit New York City, internationally acclaimed designer Rebecca Moses turned to her art for comfort, imagination, and connection. She put a post on Instagram asking women to write about their pandemic experience, letters from the heart. In return, she would paint their portrait. And the "Stay Home Sisterhood" was born.

To date, over 410 women from all over the world have shared their stories and seen themselves through Rebecca's eyes, a remarkable gift.

Rebecca also volunteered to paint the portraits of 50 nurses at Mount Sinai Hospital in honor of "The Year of The Nurse." A moment of kindness and love in a very dark time.

Listen to today's Twisting the Plot Podcast as Rebecca talks about the importance of trusting your voice, finding the beauty within, and lifting women up. Rebecca also shares with us what she's learned about "The power of the paintbrush," and our ongoing evolution.

Visit rebeccamoses.com

Check out Rebecca Moses' Instagram @rebeccamosesofficial

Over fifty, we often feel the desire for something more, something new. But to get there, we have to clear out the weeds and thorn bushes of old beliefs, expectations, and fears so that we can make space for new possibilities.

This week we spoke with Kathy Lockhardt, founder of Flourish Farms, who did just that, both physically and metaphorically. At 59, Kathy had a dream to reclaim a long-overgrown field on the family farm and turn it into a truck garden. Her family was doubtful that it could be done, but Kathy persisted. With the help of her brother-in-law and a lot of sweat and back-breaking work, Kathy created her field of dreams.

With metaphors aplenty, Kathy shares with us what she discovered about her own strength, and about listening to one's desires, trusting your dream, and learning when to rest.

Sign Up for the Flourish Farm Newsletter

Who knew getting older could be so funny?

In the 1960's gerontologist Robert Butler told us that thinking back over our lives is therapeutic. He termed his method of reminiscence, "Life Review". Through a life review, experiences from the past, particularly the unresolved conflicts, can be resolved and reintegrated into our life experience.

There is also substantial research pointing to the benefits of humor. Humor has been found to lower blood pressure, increase pain threshold, and improve the immune system. Humor reduces cortisol and increases endorphins in our systems. It also helps us gain perspective, sharpen our memory, and allows us to forgive ourselves and others.

Story and laughter bring people together.

Enter, Mary Clohan, a stand-up comedian and graduate student in New York University's program for Drama Therapy. Mary decided to combine these two healing processes. For her Masters' thesis, she examined the process and benefits of what she calls, "Laugh Review."

On this week's Twisting the Plot Podcast we hear from Mary and five of her actor/subjects, all residents of Penn South, "a naturally occurring retirement community" located in NYC, fondly referred to as NORC.

Take a listen and laugh along with us.

We are honored to have the following participants on this podcast: Hilda Aronson, Michael Bournas-Ney, Martin Sturm, Florence Cohen, and Harriet Kriegel.

Cast Bios:

Mary Clohan is a writer, performer, teaching artist and recent graduate of the NYU Master's Program in Drama Therapy. She has been performing stand-up comedy and improv comedy around NYC for the past 4 years and is interested in the therapeutic potential of humor and comedy within the creative arts therapies. Reach out to Mary Clohan via email at [email protected]

Hilda Aronson - Hilda had her 89th birthday six months ago and, being in very poor health, or lack thereof, is very proud of her highest achievement: simply being alive. Personal and professional successes lose importance. Giving and receiving an abundance of love, that's what she identifies with. All the rest is illusion.

Michael Bournas-Ney - Michael premiered as an actor in first grade, when he played the part of a washcloth. (His friend was a bar of soap.) He loves humor and was thrilled to be part of Mary's stand-up class.

Martin Sturm - Martin is now a playwright, standup comedian, and actor. These are accomplishments that he didn't think were possible, in all his wildest dreams.

Florence Cohen - Florence is a lifelong closet comedian who always tried to keep companions amused. She is also a current abstract painter and a senior trying to keep up with a constantly changing world.

Harriet Kriegel - Harriet began as a high school English teacher, moved to health care, and became Vice President of Public Affairs, Development, and Marketing at The Jewish Home and Hospital for the Aged. After retiring, she joined the Board of Penn South Social Services, which sponsors the Penn South Program for Seniors, where she has become involved with theatre and acting, discovering new talents, and doing Stand-Up Comedy. It is a thrill to discover a new skill when you are 87!

Every now and then, Cecilia and Hannah wonder, "are we there, have we made it, can we finally call ourselves adults?" It just seems like we've been waiting for decades for that certificate of achievement, or that special feeling that lets us know we've made the grade.

Yes, we are in our sixties and still asking ourselves, What does it mean to be an adult?

So this week on our Twisting the Plot Podcast we talk with Julie Lythcott-Haims, who wrote Your Turn: How To Be An Adult.

A former corporate lawyer, Julie became a Dean at Stanford University and then wrote a book, How to Raise an Adult. She also wrote a memoir, Real American, about growing up black and biracial in white spaces.

In her latest book, Julie has a lot to say about growing up. Her voice is direct and encouraging. She gets candid about her experience and she fills her book with stories by and about many different people navigating adulthood. Julie calls the storytelling her "commitment to inclusion." The stories by diverse groups of storytellers confirm a very important message: being an adult is universally complex, ongoing and not easy.

We felt reassured after reading the book. It gave us a lot to think about, a lot of tips and tools. We understand that being an adult is less a destination and more an ongoing process.

Julie's book is written for young, emerging adults but it's good for us older adult wannabees too. Perhaps it is finally "our turn."

Visit julielythcotthaims.com

Sometimes, the best plot twists come from reaching back into our pasts.

Over 40 years ago, Hannah and Cecilia lived in New York City, in apartments on the same floor, just down the hall from each other. Our 73rd Street apartments were tiny and close. We could even hear each other's conversations through an airshaft. Hannah lived with our dear friend Sza, and Ceil lived with our old friend Donna.

It's been decades, but we decided to reconnect with Donna.

Take a listen to this week's podcast where we reminisce and catch-up on marriages, smoking habits, work, values, weight fluctuations and decisions that didn't work out.

Donna DeSanto is one of a kind. She's a unique, nonjudgmental and very funny friend who for some reason loves us unconditionally. Friendships seem to matter even more as we get older. And reconnecting with Donna is a gift we gave ourselves.

Get ready for something different.

Cindy Gallop doesn't do status quo.

After years as a leader and change-maker in the advertising business she has moved on to new projects.

At 61, Cindy shares that her life course is guided by a series of serendipitous accidents. Her current accidental mission is to help us all learn about, explore and talk about…sex.

MakeLoveNotPorn aims to help us all uncover our sexual potential. Cindy explains that there are two coincidental issues preventing us from knowing who we can be as sexual beings. First, we live in a society where sex is never discussed. Second, the porn industry is bigger and more accessible than ever. Hence, what we know about sex is taught to us by porn. It leaves most of us confused, unsatisfied, and missing out. MakeLoveNotPorn is a platform that invites real people to show real sex, in all its diversity. It aims to dispel myths, bash stereotypes, and free us all physically, emotionally and intimately.

It's a provocative topic. It's a bold business.

Cindy shakes us up and makes us think.

It's a plot twist for all.

Learn more about Cindy at cindygallop.com

Check out makelovenotporn.tv

In today's podcast Hannah and Cecilia take time to reflect on what we have learned from recent podcast guests.

One of the joys of our Twisting the Plot podcast is getting to meet some truly incredible people. Whether they are caregivers, educators, artists, mothers, aunts, friends…they all have a story to tell.

What we had not anticipated is how listening to these stories would affect us.

This week we thought we would talk about a few recent conversations that have done just that.

First, we discuss how Maria Hodermarska, a professor at NYU, taught us about letting go and, through the process, continuing to grow. Then there was Erin Pace, an embodiment coach, who asked us, What if you are perfect just the way you are? Finally, we ponder about our conversation with Nikki Giovanni, poet, activist and teacher who leads by example, speaking her truth with honesty, grace, and dignity. Among the many things, Nikki taught us is to marvel at the granularity of life.

We also share how the women in our Twelve in Twelve Program remind us about the importance of community, and the power of being seen and heard.

Come reflect with us.

We are filled with gratitude for all the women, and all the stories.