The Dicks discover the genesis of ALL conspiracy theories! Jesse did end up joining a cult, Ed joins the 80%, and Mike joins the shade, frowned upon by others that work in the solar panel industry. Byeeeeeaaaah.

The dicks mainly complain about the Florida heat, but you also get an unrequested look into the inner workings of the bar, Jesse’s cult contemplation, and your new retirement plan.

Ed wanted to talk pits, tits, and grits. Instead the pirates invade, and no one is safe…except the books. The books are safe.

Are you looking for the answer to, “what is a fear boner?”, “should Yahweh be a common name?”, or if Mitch ever unfroze? Tune in!

Still contemplating the chicken or the egg debate? Worried about the writers’ and whether they’ll get what they deserve? Still… the Dicks got you covered. Fine, Jesse! I’ll capitalize DICKS. =)

Mike gets some job-hunting advice, we hear about Jesse’s Father’s white world album theory, and Indiana Jones makes his way into Jesse’s holiday weekend.

Now on display, Jesse’s Ill-timed marathon, his ex-wife’s porn-star boss, and his arachnophobia. Guess which one will be screaming back into your ear holes next week.

This week the dicks welcome back their favorite prison guard to talk legal prostitution. Han Solo’s carbonite nightmares, and delaying gratification. No, not edging Mike! Geez.

After a difficult start, the Dicks get stuck in a bud light back and froth, result in a trans dilemma. Sorry it was a dilemma from birth, unless you call it something different. Hand slams forehead.

The dicks aren’t distracted by the local GOP race, instead Jesse gives away a great car club idea, and Ed reveals if he killed any animals over the last week.