In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, Ben DeLeon talks about the importance of learning to laugh at yourself, let go of perfection, and stop worrying so much about how other people see you.

From embarrassing moments to trying things outside your comfort zone, Ben explores why being silly isn’t a sign of immaturity—it’s a sign that you’re comfortable enough to enjoy life. He also shares a personal story about doing karaoke with professional musicians, including performers who had appeared on national television, and how watching them have fun and step outside their comfort zones taught him to loosen up.

Because if they could get on stage and be goofy, then Ben could certainly get up there and deliver his best version of “Ice Ice Baby.”

This episode is a reminder that you can be responsible without being rigid, mature without being miserable, and committed to personal growth without taking yourself so seriously.

Sometimes, you just need to laugh, try something new, and enjoy the moment.

Background music provided by: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=721s 

Artist retains all rights.

Why Do We Go Back to the People Who Hurt Us?

Why would someone return to a person who abused them?

It’s a question I’ve asked myself—and one I’m still trying to understand.

I’ve experienced emotional abuse myself. It wasn't physical, but I learned firsthand that abuse doesn't have to leave bruises to leave scars.

Now, someone close to me has found herself reconnecting with someone who previously abused her—a relationship that became so dangerous that she nearly lost her life.

And watching it happen has left me scared, frustrated, and honestly... confused.

So instead of simply asking, “Why doesn't she just leave?” I decided to ask a different question:

What happens to someone psychologically that makes returning to an abusive relationship possible?

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we explore trauma bonding, intermittent reinforcement, emotional manipulation, damaged self-worth, hope, fear, and why leaving an abusive relationship isn't always as simple as outsiders think.

We'll also talk about something equally important: what friends and family can do when someone they love keeps returning to an abusive partner.

Because sometimes the person being abused doesn't need another person judging them.

They need someone willing to say:

“I believe you. I love you. You don't deserve this. And when you're ready, I'm here.”

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or abuse, help is available.

National Domestic Violence Hotline
📞 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
📱 Text START to 88788
🌐 thehotline.org

RAINN – National Sexual Assault Hotline
📞 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
📱 Text HOPE to 64673
🌐 rainn.org

If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

Please remember that internet and phone activity can potentially be monitored by an abuser. If you believe your communications aren't private, consider contacting an advocate from a safer device or location.

This isn't an episode about blaming victims.

It's about understanding them.

Because sometimes, before we can help someone break a cycle...

we have to understand why the cycle is so damn difficult to break.

Music provided by:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWlbc-DExKE&t=541s 

Episode 40: 10 Rules to Live By 

What if the lessons that make the biggest difference in your life aren't complicated at all? 

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, Ben DeLeon shares 10 personal rules to live by—lessons shaped by experience, mistakes, growth, and probably a few hard-learned lessons along the way. 

These aren't commandments, and they're not meant to be. 

They're simply lessons that have proven useful—and maybe one or two will prove useful to you too. 

Because sometimes the best thing we can do for someone isn't give them an answer. 

It's give them the benefit of what we've already learned. 

Take what works. 

Question what doesn't. 

Throw away the rest. 

And then...come up with your own 10 rules to live by. 

Because you never know when something you learned the hard way might save someone else from having to learn it the same way. 

Music credits can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9G2GjWQM1c&t=740s 

All rights retained by artist. 

You can't control the story people tell about you. 

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we explore what happens when someone misunderstands your intentions, judges your choices, or decides who you are without knowing the whole story—and why trying to constantly correct other people's opinions can become exhausting. 

We'll talk about the difference between taking accountability and defending yourself, why sometimes you really do need to listen when someone points out something about you, and why other times the healthiest thing you can do is simply let someone have their opinion. 

You can control your actions.
You can control your integrity.
You can control the person you're becoming. 

But you don't control the audience. 

So instead of constantly asking, "What do they think of me?" 

Maybe it's time to ask: 

"Do I respect the person I'm becoming?" 

Because you can spend your entire life correcting people's opinions of you... or you can spend that life becoming someone you respect. 

 Background music provided by: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=574s 

All rights retained by artist. 

How much of your stress comes from what actually happened... and how much comes from the story you told yourself about what happened?

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we take a look at one of the easiest traps to fall into: taking everything personally.

Someone doesn't text back. Someone seems distant. Your boss chooses someone else. Someone disagrees with you. A comment hits the wrong nerve—and suddenly your mind is filling in the blanks, creating explanations, and turning a thirty-second interaction into hours of unnecessary stress.

We'll talk about the difference between facts and interpretations, why we assume the worst, how to stop turning every disappointment into a judgment of your worth, and when it's better to simply keep scrolling and protect your peace.

Because not everything is about you.

And not everything deserves your energy.

Sometimes the most freeing thing you can say is:

"I don't actually know."

Take a breath. Look at the facts. Question the story.

And remember—you don't have to carry everything you feel.

Background music provided by: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=737s

All rights retained by the artist.

Episode 37: Stop Being The Problem Solver

Are you the person everyone comes to when something goes wrong?

At first, being the problem solver feels good. People trust you. They appreciate you. You feel useful. But somewhere along the way, being helpful can turn into being everyone's personal help desk—and suddenly your own work is falling behind while everyone else waits for you to fix their problems.

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we explore what happens when helping people becomes enabling them, why constantly having the answer can create dependency, and how one simple question can completely change the dynamic:

"What do YOU think we should do about this?"

Instead of solving every problem, learn how to become a thought partner—a coach, a guide, a mirror—not an answer machine.

Because the goal isn't to become the person everyone needs.

It's to help people become capable of not needing you.

Background music provided by: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=735s

All rights reserved by the artist. 

What matters more: being right... or getting the result you're actually hoping for?

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we explore why winning an argument isn't always the same as making a difference. Whether it's with your spouse, your kids, your coworkers, or even strangers online, our need to prove we're right can sometimes get in the way of what really matters—building trust, strengthening relationships, and solving problems.

We'll discuss the role of ego in difficult conversations, the power of listening with purpose, and how to know when standing your ground is necessary—and when it's better to pursue understanding instead.

Because the goal isn't to win every argument.

The goal is to leave the conversation better than you found it.

*Background music provided by: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=2005s

All rights reserved by the artist.

• (00:00:03) - How to Win at Life
• (00:05:31) - What Your Ego Needs to Know

Have you ever been asked to step into a higher position, take on more responsibility, prove you can do the job... only to watch someone from the outside get hired—and then be asked to train them?

If so, you're not alone.

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we tackle one of the most frustrating experiences in the workplace. We'll explore the difference between being needed and being valued, why hard work doesn't always lead to promotion, and how to protect your professionalism without sacrificing your career growth.

Most importantly, we'll discuss when loyalty is admirable... and when it starts costing you opportunities.

Because your job title doesn't define your worth—but your willingness to advocate for your future just might.

Stop waiting to be noticed. Start preparing to be recognized.

• (00:00:00) - What Really Stings About Being Hired Vacant?
• (00:01:29) - Being Valued in the Workplace
• (00:04:57) - When You're Passed Over for Training Your Replacement
• (00:08:56) - The Hard Truth of Career Choices

What does it really mean to be independent?

In this special Independence Day episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we go beyond the fireworks, parades, and celebrations to explore the true meaning of freedom. Independence isn't just about the birth of a nation—it's about the choices we make every day to take responsibility for our lives, our actions, and our future.

We'll discuss why real freedom requires discipline, why personal responsibility is the foundation of independence, and how the example we set today shapes the next generation tomorrow.

This Fourth of July, don't just celebrate freedom—ask yourself if you're living it.

Because freedom isn't the absence of responsibility.

It's the courage to embrace it.

Music credit here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw&t=427s

• (00:00:03) - What Does Independence Really Mean?

Everybody says they want the truth—but what if the biggest obstacle isn't hearing the truth from others? What if it's being honest with ourselves?

In this episode of Un-Shuck Yourself, we explore why honesty is one of the most difficult—and most transformative—skills we can develop. We'll unpack the subtle ways we avoid uncomfortable truths, the stories we tell ourselves to stay comfortable, and why real growth begins the moment we stop making excuses and start taking ownership.

If you've ever felt stuck, frustrated, or wondered why change seems so difficult, this episode offers a simple but powerful challenge: take an honest look in the mirror.

Because the truth doesn't change your life.

Your honesty about the truth does.

Music credit goes to:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-_1Os7hVDw

• (00:00:03) - Unshuck Yourself: Sorry to Be Absent
• (00:02:10) - Why No One Will Be Honest
• (00:05:43) - The 7 Day Challenge to Unshock Yourself