Unashamed & Unapologetic

On this episode Donnie Blanco joins Shatai for some cocktails and conversation about growing up, jumping off the porch, going to prison, getting shot, and parenting. Donnie shares his story of overcoming adversity and changing his life from negative to positive. “I thought I was destined to die in these streets, but fatherhood changed my f*cking life”.  He drops gems on healthy boundaries in parenting and dating with children. When is it okay to meet each other’s kids? Donnie lets us know the meaning of his name: Donald means “King of the world” What kind of leader do you want to be? With great influence comes great responsibility. The two also discuss depression among black men. “I think every black man in America knows about depression. Feeling counted out, feeling like you’re not enough, the feeling of not being satisfied with yourself, and comparing yourself to someone else.”

IT’S SHATAI’S DIRTY 30! Help her celebrate by ordering some podcast merch!! ANXIOUS AF and Unashamed & Unapologetic tees and hoodies out now!

Domestic Violence Awareness Episode 4!
Today's guest, Ana Haigh joins Shatai and shares her own story of intimate partner abuse. The two discuss micro aggressions and sexual harassment that starts as early as middle school and high school, and how kids are conditioned to this behavior. A lot of it gets brushed under the rug and normalized. Ana is a domestic violence advocate and does amazing work in the community, working to help survivors of abuse. 
Shatai talks about dodging the bullet while casually dating a man who she later found out was extremely abusive. It all starts with that subtle jealously that many of us find flattering at first. JEALOUSY IS USALLY THE FIRST WARNING SIGN!
Be on the lookout for updates on a new video episode: Side Effects of Racism in 2020!!
Tune in to Self- Care Sunday posts of Instagram.

IT'S SHATAI'S BIRTHDAY MONTH! As a way to celebrate she will be doing a fundraiser for the podcast to raise money for dope projects she has up her sleeve. 
If you would like to contribute you an send to the  following:
cash app: $shataijoiner
venmo: @shatai
or contact Shatai about other ways to donate. 
[email protected]
IG: @Thementalunhealthpodcast
FB: Unashamed & Unapologetic: The Mental Un-Health Podcast

Featured Music: Birds x Juliano Dock ft Vin. 

Savanna Hartman joins Shatai this episode and shares her personal experience of being in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship, how she was able to leave, and how she now helps survivors of human trafficking. Human trafficking isn’t just like how you see it on the movie Taken. Savanna explains the shocking truth about how prevalent it is, and how in plain sight trafficking is.  DV doesn’t discriminate and can happen in any race, culture, or economic class. Domestic violence is so complex with no “one size fits all” explanation, so you can’t just ask “why didn’t you leave?”. The two discuss how shame is a huge component to domestic violence, and prevents survivors from reaching out for help or letting others know what they’re going through. TALKING ABOUT IT is part of the healing process and eliminates that shame and empowers you in your healing journey. Support is a HUGE part of healing. 

Savanna Hartman
FB- Savanna Hartman
IG- @savannasmilesss
Featured Music: Thanos x Juliano Dock 

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS SERIES EPISODE 2!
On this episode Angelina Valdez joins Shatai and shares her experiences with two abusive relationships. She describes in graphic detail the abuse she endured (trigger warning), how  law enforcement and DHS were less than helpful, and how she was able to leave these relationships. Angelina learned that the best way to avoid these dangerous situations was to build her self-esteem up and learn to love herself more. With the help of her therapist she was able to heal and find herself...and damn is she FEIRCE! With a little grace, wit, and a couple cocktails, these two explore why boundaries are so important, how abusers use blame and shame as means of control, and the stigma that keeps people from reaching out for help. 
"We accept the love we think we deserve"- The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
Healing means not only overcoming the things you've been through, but strengthening yourself and finding self-love. 
If you are in an abusive relationship and need help, reach out to loved ones or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)

Featured Music: All Along x Apollo Spacey

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month! We are kicking this DV series off with a special feature from Courageous Fire, Founder of Courageous Fire LLC. She sheds light on psychological abuse, one of the forms of domestic violence that often goes under the radar, but can at times cause the most long-lasting damage. Gaslighting, or making you question your own truth and reality is one of the most twisted ways to gain control in the relationship. The two dissect and share examples of physical, economical, emotional, religious, and sexual abuse as well. We know what we are taught, and that also goes for expectations in relationships. Many of these abusive behaviors are normalized and commonly accepted as “the way things are” or blamed on the survivor because they weren’t doing “enough” of something in the relationship. Survivors are NEVER to blame for the abuse they endure. Abusers seek out vulnerabilities that they can take advantage of and use as a way to gain control.

 SELF AWARENESS: Know what your personal vulnerabilities are so you can learn to set and enforce healthy boundaries!

Courageous created and facilitates a 6-week curriculum that empowers survivors of abuse and begins the groundwork for healing. She does amazing work in the community and is a voice for domestic violence awareness, but most of all she cultivates a space that allows us to give ourselves PERMISSION to heal, love ourselves, and acknowledge our self-worth. 

 Randy Duncan, from Des Moines east/south side, joins Shatai on this episode. He shares how he got the stage name Pezzy tha Pipeman "And no it isn't just a d*ck reference". Randy talks about his experience growing up, being raised by his aunt instead of either of his parents. He shares his experience with being the "cry baby" out of all his friends as a kid, but how he realized being a man means being able to show different emotions. What the heck is kick-soccer-baseball?! It's a midwest thing. Shatai and Randy discuss Covid-19, their opinions on wearing a mask, and Randy's theory that marijuana may or may not give him immunity. Being a father: one of his favorite roles and he wouldn't change a thing about it. Randy speaks for the first time about the loss of his best friend who was tragically   killed as a result of domestic violence. Grief doesn't always come right away, or at the time of the funeral, but in all of the daily reminders of that person. How does he cope with his grief? "I don't run from it. I don't try to act like nothing happened, and I try to remember her everyday." 
French film "Cuties" has raised a lot of outrage here in the U.S. as it debuted on Netflix. SPOILER ALERT: Shatai dissects parts of this movie and discusses the realities of sexualization in young girls as well as pressure from social media to be "cuties". Listen to find out her opinion on the film. CANCEL CULTURE CAN BE TOXIC. How are we doing ourselves a disservice by forming strong opinions without knowing all of the facts? Does information overload contribute to anxiety?
IN A TOXIC SITUATION with a friend, significant other, or co-worker??? Send in your questions, entanglements, situations you need advice on and they'll be featured on the IGTV and Youtube series COMING SOON. 
Find Randy Duncan on Facebook and Snapchat @pipemanshawtyfr

Featuring special guest Amber! She shares about her journey of self-love and talks about how living authentically brings the most happiness in her life. We talk spirituality and her passion & gift for reading tarot. Amber gives Shatai her FIRST EVER tarot reading on this episode!!!  It is spot on and a little crazy! Amber sheds light on her personal journey, navigating through life, and becoming a therapist herself. 
Des Moines, Iowa's Sista Soul Festival was an AMAZING experience! This event showcased the female entrepreneurs in Des Moines and empowered women to come together and create positive energy! How are you surviving the pandemic, political craziness and social injustice of 2020?! How do you self-care?
TOXIC TUESDAYS coming soon! Keep sending in your questions, stories, and examples of toxic relationships and they will be featured (anonymously if you'd like) on this new IGTV & Facebook series!
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the podcast will be sharing stories from real survivors as well as professionals who specialize in domestic violence. Do you want your voice heard on the podcast? Send a DM or email!
MAKE SURE YOU VOTE!!!!! IT IS IMPORTANT AF. 

Featured music: Mood Swing x Subjec1ne

What better to do when you're on an all girls cabin vacation than to talk about Cardi B & Megan Thee Stallion's WAP around the campfire!? From the lyrics to the video! We analyze sexuality in the entertainment industry, double standards between men and women, and the effects sex shaming has on women's mental health. Shatai and her friends Shannon, Marli, Ciera, Dalal, and Latitia get vulnerable as they share their views on body image and sexuality, discuss personal experiences with shame, and insecurities they've faced. Social media is a silent killer! "The more I scroll down my timeline, the worse I feel about myself". Why do we compare ourselves to images on the internet that we know are not true? When you live for yourself and not everyone else you will realize that you are more than GOOD ENOUGH.  "You can be the finest peach, but there will always be someone that hates peaches". Be your f*cking self! 

Kayla Bell-Consolver joins Shatai on this episode as she shares her story of becoming. Kayla talks about growing up in the church, exploring her own identity and sexuality, marrying the love of her life, who just happens to be a woman. Coming out in a safe space is important! Above all, living your truth and being your authentic self is the true key to happiness. Shatai and Kayla talk about growing up black, and being seen as the family trophy, even if it means blemishing that trophy at times. Also: therapists need therapy too! How did they find they "right" therapists for them?
Find Kayla on Tumblr : QuestionKayla

COMING SOON: Bonus episode where Shatai and friends talk about Cardi B and Megan thee Stallion's new song W.A.P. How do double standards about sexuality shame women and contribute to self-esteem?

This episode features special guest Subjec1ne (Quincy King). He shares his journey from basketball to the creative process behind his music and clothing line, Fashionary Black. He drops gems on how focusing on the positive, using stress as motivation, and before anything else: keeping it 100 and being true to who you are is essential. Sometimes we find our purpose through pain. Quincy talks about how he was able to overcome hard times and through that find his passion. Listen to his song "Black" on this episode! Find more of his music on Apple Music and all other streaming platforms. 
SHOP: fashionaryblack.com
IG: @subjec1ne
Facebook: Quincy King

Teresa Zilk from Covid Recovery Iowa joins Shatai on the podcast and shares information on how to access FREE mental health and community resources across the state of Iowa. If you are experiencing anxiety, depression, or any other mental health issues and need peer support, community connection, or even a therapist while social distancing contact Covid Recovery Iowa.
Covidrecoveryiowa.org
1-844-7759276