Unburdened with Zoe

What do you do when the person who should nurture you becomes the one who breaks you down? For Lydia, childhood took a sharp turn when her younger brother was born. Her mother became unpredictable—cruel, controlling, and emotionally abusive. What started as biting words and impossible expectations escalated into full-blown rage, manipulation, and even physical aggression.  

Unlike the rest of her family, Lydia refused to stay silent. She questioned, she resisted, and for that, she became the scapegoat. Her mother threw insults like weapons, mocked her appearance, dismissed her struggles, and punished her for standing up for herself. But the final betrayal came when her mother had an affair and blamed *her* for it. That was the breaking point.  

Now, as a mother herself, Lydia is determined to break the cycle. But healing isn’t linear—motherhood has reopened wounds, especially as she processes the complex emotions of never having a daughter, something she thought would bring full closure.  

In this episode, Lydia shares:  
🔥 What it’s like to grow up with an emotionally unstable and abusive mother  
🔥 The moment she knew she had to cut contact—and the fallout that followed  
🔥 How standing up for herself made her the family scapegoat  
🔥 How discovering art as a form of therapy became a lifeline in her healing journey

This raw, unfiltered conversation is for anyone who has been blamed, gaslit, or made to feel like they were never enough. Lydian’s story is a powerful testament to resilience, self-trust, and the power of walking away.

What happens when the person meant to protect you is the one who sells your safety for their own gain? For Diana, childhood wasn’t just traumatic—it was orchestrated cruelty. From the age of five, she endured years of sexual, emotional, and physical abuse at the hands of her stepfather, all while her mother turned a blind eye. When the truth came out decades later, the betrayal was even darker than she imagined—her mother had knowingly allowed the abuse to continue in exchange for financial security.  

At 18, with just £20 to her name and broken English, Diana fled Poland, fearing for her life. But the effects of her past followed her, showing up in ways she never expected. By 29, she was diagnosed with cervical cancer—then later, breast cancer—all of which she believes were a direct result of years of suppressed trauma and unspoken pain. But Diana is more than what happened to her. She not only survived—she healed, she fought, and she went on to defy the odds by giving birth to a healthy son at 39 after being told she could never conceive naturally.  

In this deeply moving episode, Diana shares:  

🔥 The horrifying truth of her mother’s betrayal and the abuse she endured  

🔥 How trauma manifests in the body and why healing is critical  

🔥 The emotional and physical toll of being silenced for years  

🔥 Her fight against cancer—twice—and how it shaped her journey  

🔥 Becoming the mother she never had and breaking the cycle  

This is an episode about survival, strength, and reclaiming your life. If you’ve ever felt silenced, dismissed, or broken by the people who were supposed to love you most, Diana’s story will remind you: *Your pain does not define you—your healing does.*

How do you recognise abuse when it’s disguised as control and manipulation? For Alex, childhood was overshadowed by coercion, fear, and emotional abuse at the hands of her stepfather. From the ages of 8 to 15, she endured a cycle of grooming and control that shaped every part of who she is today. But in the darkest of times, she found a refuge—school became her safe space, and that experience ultimately led her to become a secondary school teacher.  

Now, after years of therapy, Alex is undergoing Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, a treatment that has helped her process the trauma that followed her into adulthood. For the first time since she was 15, she no longer struggles with self-harm urges, and she is finding healing in ways she never thought possible.  

In this episode, Alex shares:  
✨ The reality of grooming and coercive control in childhood abuse  
✨ How childhood trauma shapes identity and mental health into adulthood  
✨ The power of IFS therapy and how it has helped her make breakthroughs  
✨ How she turned her trauma into purpose, becoming a teacher to help young people  
✨ The importance of recognising and naming abuse—so others can, too  

Alex joins us anonymously to protect her privacy, but her story is a powerful testament to resilience, healing, and the importance of breaking the silence. If you’ve ever felt trapped by your past or wondered how therapy can truly change your life, this episode is for you.

What happens when a parent cares more about how they *look* as a parent than actually being one? For Paula, love with her father was never unconditional—it was a performance for social media, a show for public events, but behind closed doors, it was filled with emotional distance, blame, and zero accountability.  

After years of careful conversations, constant effort, and trying to maintain a relationship that always felt one-sided, the final phone call ended with him hanging up. And for the first time, Paula didn’t call back.  

Growing up in a fractured home, shuffled between parents who prioritised their new partners over their children, Paula spent years struggling to understand why she always felt *not enough*—even in adulthood, despite being in a loving marriage and raising two daughters of her own.  

In this episode, Paula shares:  

🔥 The devastating impact of an emotionally immature parent  

🔥 How growing up with conditional love affects confidence and relationships  

🔥 Why she finally walked away after a lifetime of effort  

🔥 The power of choosing peace over toxic family ties  

If you’ve ever felt unseen, unappreciated, or exhausted from chasing love that should have been freely given, this episode is for you.

What happens when a parent refuses to take responsibility for the damage they’ve caused? For Tycheica, the deepest pain isn’t just the neglect and abuse she endured as a child—it’s her mother’s complete lack of accountability. While her mother acknowledges her siblings’ struggles, she dismisses Tycheica’s entirely, gaslighting her pain and denying the trauma she survived.  

Now a mother of two young daughters, Tycheica is navigating parenting without the safety net of a supportive mother-daughter relationship. When she reached out during the depths of postpartum depression, desperate for comfort, her mother’s response was cold and cruel: *“Get a grip. You can’t be.”* That moment solidified what she had always known—her mother was never going to change.  

In this episode, Tycheica opens up about:  

💔 Growing up in an abusive home where neglect was dismissed and pain was ignored  

💔 How narcissistic parents play favorites to maintain control  

💔 The struggles of parenting without a mother’s support  

💔 Breaking free from the cycle and choosing low contact for her own well-being  

💔 The reality of healing—even when the hurt lingers  

If you’ve ever had a parent who rewrites history, refuses accountability, or plays the victim at your expense, this episode will remind you: *You don’t need their permission to heal.*

What happens when the person who’s supposed to love you most decides not to? For Mel, that reality shaped her entire life. At just five years old, her mother moved away, taking her brother and grandmother but leaving Mel behind. For years, she was fed lies about why her mother wasn’t in her life, yet the only thing she truly felt was shame—shame for not having a mother, for not being in contact, and for being the child who wasn’t chosen.  

As the years passed, Mel’s mother returned, but only to reinforce the same painful truth—she didn’t want to be a mother to her. Despite Mel’s efforts to build a relationship, the excuses never stopped, and the abandonment cut even deeper when her mother prioritised her brother while keeping Mel at a distance. Now estranged for a decade, Mel is stepping into therapy for the first time, ready to heal and speak her truth.  

⭐ The lasting effects of childhood abandonment and feeling 'unwanted'  
⭐ How early rejection shapes adult relationships and self-worth  
⭐ The struggle to ask for help and let others in  
⭐ Why estrangement can be a form of self-protection  
⭐ How to start healing from a parent who never took accountability  

For anyone who has ever felt like they weren’t enough for a parent’s love, this conversation will remind you that *their choices were never a reflection of your worth.

You can Mel on Tiktok @queenofpentacles8 

What happens when the people who are supposed to protect you are the ones who cause you the most pain? In this episode, Grace shares her story of growing up in an unstable home—navigating her parents’ divorce, her father’s deep depression, and years of bullying from her mother’s partner. Feeling trapped in a toxic environment, Grace left home at just 16, spending years sleeping on a friend’s floor, trying to escape the weight of it all.

The effects of that betrayal followed her into early adulthood, manifesting as extreme OCD and a struggle for control over a life that had once felt so chaotic. But through years of self-work and healing, Grace has reclaimed her sense of self. Now, at 26, she’s in a stronger place than ever, learning how to redefine her relationships with the parents who hurt her and shape a future on her own terms.

✨ The lasting impact of childhood instability and toxic family dynamics
✨ How OCD and control can develop as a response to trauma
✨ Rebuilding your identity outside of your past
✨ Navigating relationships with parents who made mistakes
✨ What healing really looks like and how to start

If you’ve ever struggled with the weight of toxic parenting, felt lost in your healing journey, or wondered if you can rebuild a relationship with a parent who let you down—this episode is for you.

Growing up in a home where love felt conditional and emotional instability ruled can shape every part of who we become. In this episode, Claire shares her experience of growing up with an emotionally abusive and neglectful mother—one whose words and reactions left lasting wounds.

Claire opens up about what it was like to walk on eggshells as a child, constantly seeking approval while being met with verbal abuse. She discusses how this experience shaped her confidence, relationships, and even her role as a mother today. After a pivotal moment in her adult life, Claire was finally able to unpack her past, seek therapy, and start healing.

If you’ve ever struggled with the effects of an emotionally abusive parent, felt the weight of people-pleasing, or are working to break the cycle in your own parenting, this episode is for you.

🔹 How emotional neglect can be just as damaging as physical abuse
🔹 The long-term effects of growing up with an unpredictable parent
🔹 The turning point that led Claire to seek therapy and reclaim her life
🔹 Breaking the cycle: Becoming the parent you never had

Join us for this powerful conversation on breaking free, healing, and redefining love on your own terms.

In this powerful and deeply personal episode, we talk with Hiruni about her journey of estrangement, resilience, and healing after years of emotional and physical abuse. Leaving her family home at just 17, Hiruni faced the challenges of sofa-surfing while preparing for her A-levels and navigating the uncertainties of estranged life as a student.  

Hiruni opens up about the complexities of emotional vs. physical abuse, the struggles with self-doubt, and the lack of intervention during her childhood. She shares how societal perceptions and cultural nuances impacted her experience, while also reflecting on the strength she's gained and the incredible support system she's found along the way.  Join us as we explore Hiruni’s journey, the breakthroughs that have helped her heal, and her inspiring message of hope for those facing similar struggles.

You can follow Hiruni here on Tiktok at: @Hirunifernando_ 

In this episode, we sit down with Matt Appleby as he shares his journey of healing from a toxic family dynamic shaped by a narcissistic parent. Matt opens up about how pivotal life moments—becoming a father, the loss of a beloved grandparent, the breakdown of his marriage, and the realisation of his mother’s narcissistic traits—have acted as powerful catalysts for growth. 

He delves into the healing modalities that have supported his journey, from yoga to counseling, retreats, and body-based therapies, offering insights into the layered process of unlearning conditioning and finding inner peace. Tune in to hear Matt’s inspiring story and discover actionable wisdom for navigating the path to healing and self-discovery. 

You can follow Matt @polarity.healing on Instagram. 

Below are some links of insights and therapies methods talked about:

Richard Grannon - https://www.richardgrannon.com/

Safe and Sound Protocol (based on Polyvagal Theory) - https://integratedlistening.com/products/ssp-safe-sound-protocol/

The Sedona Method - https://www.sedona.com/Home.asp