Unchecked Baggage

Welcome to Unchecked Baggage, a podcast with hosts Lena and Rob, all about relationship advice. Join the conversation as they discuss emotional baggage, blended families, love, sex, relationships, and life. Lena and Rob are here to help you with your baggage—life is too short to be weighed down by unchecked baggage. Listen as they take a look at what happened to relationships during the pandemic. How has COVID affected us as a society and the continuum of relationships?

First, Lena and Rob take a look at couples who were paired up prior to the pandemic. They discuss the various sources of stress—jobs, finances, kids at home, sickness, housework, and so much more. Additionally, they take a look at possible stress reliefs that the pandemic brought, such as removing work commutes. With countless factors in play, they seek to understand the overall trajectory of these relationships as a result. Next, they dive into how these factors affected other relationships on the continuum.

Did the pandemic really cause the divorce and break-up rates to skyrocket? Rob shares the importance of making time for your relationship and not always putting the kids first. Learn to spread your time out in a meaningful way. Some people even think the divorce rates have declined, but is this simply due to places being closed? Listen in as they provide a list of questions and things to consider before getting a divorce during these times. Shifting toward the dating scene, Lena and Rob discuss the uptick in matchmaking and online dating sites. They even chat about the recent vaccine pickup lines and how profiles seem to be changing in content as people self-reflect.

To end this episode, Rob and Lena dive into the sex conversation. Learn more about how COVID spreads, what the safest kind of sex is during COVID, and the “glory hole”. Has the pandemic changed sex forever? Don’t miss their answers to these questions. In conclusion, Rob and Lena encourage listeners to take the time to address the possible baggage they have and let it go.

Links:

For more information about COVID and the relationship stats provided on this episode, check out the following links:

• https://www.verywellmind.com/relationships-during-covid19-survey-5105103

Unchecked Baggage is a brand new podcast all about relationship advice. The episodes are aimed at talking about emotional baggage, love, sex, and relationships. The hosts, Lena and Rob, believe that life is too short to be weighed down by unchecked baggage and seek to help listeners let go of past baggage to have better relationships with others. They have been married seven years, but have both brought some emotional baggage from past relationships. Listen as they share about this baggage and what has helped them overcome it. 

Today’s episode is all about the importance of having couple friends within a relationship. Rob discusses the excitement in seeing your spouse interact excitedly with others face to face. Observing how other couples interact can help you gauge your own relationship dynamics. He points out the three benefits of having overlapping couple friends: that it increases your attraction to each other, creates a support system and protects your relationship. 

Then, they discuss whether having single friends leads to distrust. In Lena’s experience, most of her single friends of the opposite sex have been in her life before her relationship. It’s important to set boundaries and have a clear understanding of what your spouse is comfortable with. Most importantly, you must have respect for your partner so they feel at ease and can easily voice their feelings on the subject. It is the responsibility as the person with the single friend of the opposite sex to respect your partner’s comfort level and to speak positively about your partner with others. 

With all of this being said, they move on to address the question: How can you make couple friends? According to Lena’s research, there are three different types of couples. Seekers are people who really want to meet other couples. Keepers are happy with the friends they have, but are still sometimes open to meeting new people. Finally, nesters are people who are happy with a small circle and uninterested in making new friends. A few places to find friends are at work, in facebook and community groups, on apps and through your kid’s schools. Usually, it’s better to choose engaging activities to do with new friends rather than something as intimate as dinner. 

Finally, they point out a few things to look out for when making new friends. It’s perfectly normal not to get along with everyone you meet, and gauging how you feel after spending time with others is a good way to determine if the friendship is beneficial to your relationship. Finding friends who are well suited for your relationship and lifestyle takes work, but is worth it. 

Links:

Read more information about how to handle relationship baggage in the articles below: 

• https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/the-profound-importance-of-having-couples-friends/

Unchecked Baggage is a brand new podcast all about relationship advice. The episodes are aimed at talking about emotional baggage, love, sex, and relationships. The hosts, Lena and Rob, believe that life is too short to be weighed down by unchecked baggage and seek to help listeners let go of past baggage to have better relationships with others. They have been married seven years, but have both brought some emotional baggage from past relationships. Listen as they share about this baggage and what has helped them overcome it. 

First, Lena and Rob define emotional baggage as negative unprocessed emotions from past experiences. They point out three types of baggage that can threaten relationships. The first is through family of origin, which can be baggage brought from parents, siblings, or another family member. A good way to address this kind of baggage is through forgiving them, but to also removing yourself from them. Second is depression baggage and Rob shares about his own journey with this. A good way to combat depression is through doing things you enjoy and self care. The last kind of baggage they discuss is the X-factor baggage where you are hung up on a x boyfriend/girlfriend. Rob and Lena talk about how to approach a girlfriend/boyfriend who is holding this baggage.

Next, Lena and Rob talk about sneaky types of baggage which must be addressed in order to have a healthy relationship. First is guilt, which is a feeling you have when you think you’ve done something wrong. They encourage listeners with this baggage to learn from past mistakes rather than letting them control you. Second is regret, which is living in the past. Lena encourages listeners with this baggage to practice learning from the past while focusing on the present. Next is the baggage of fear of the unknown or from past experiences. This can be addressed through exposing yourself to what you are afraid of alongside a good support system. Fourth is inner criticism of talking badly to yourself. Rob and Lena both encourage this to be addressed by learning to silence your inner critic and practicing self care. Lastly is PTSD, which can be addressed through therapy with a professional. 

Lastly, Rob and Lena focus on baggage that comes from past or present toxic relationships. They both share some of the baggage they have brought from past relationships and how it has affected their own current relationship. There are several steps that can be taken to address baggage from toxic relationships. The first is purging all physical reminders of the relationship. Secondly is the ability and willingness to open up about the past hurt when a new partner comes along. Lastly is to spend time in self care through journaling, therapy, yoga, or any other activity you enjoy. In conclusion, Rob and Lena encourage listeners to take the time to address and process past baggage which will lead to much healthier preset relationships. 

Links:

Read more information about how to handle relationship baggage in the articles below: 

• https://www.eharmony.com/blog/3-types-emotional-baggage-threaten-relationships/