Under The Floodlights

Get your pen and notepad out because school's about to start. After a fierce response by the Under The Floodlights faithful, Darren attempts to validate comments made last week by dropping a critical analysis of Zinedine Zidane.

Getting into this weekend's topics, the guys are puzzled by Aston Villa's ability to be both good and bad whilst Arsenal begin their usual mid-season slump.

Are Sheffield United down or is there hope for their season yet? We weigh in with our opinions and as usual, come to an inconclusive verdict.

Ole takes control of the narrative with his comments about Manchester United's fixture list so we offer up some constructive criticism about how Ole could make that point more effectively.

Other talking points this week include a new Stockley Park based reality show, positive news in the fight against COVID and a huge name in the football world being the face of boner pills.

Reminder that due to the upcoming international break there will be no podcast next week. Episode 9 will be released on 25/11/20.

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Darren enjoys winning his second Under The Floodlights derby of the season as Liverpool go top of the Premier League table. 

The guys get misty eyed talking about the aesthetics of James Ward Prowse free kicks but at least refrain from citing any terminology from Urban Dictionary in their analysis (unlike Martin Keown...).

Arteta breaks Arsneal's duck away from home against Big 6 (15th) sides as Manchester United start four central midfielder not named Donny van de Beek in their lineup.

Other topics this week include the death of the Burnley away fixture, summer soccer camps and professional managers on instagram before Bailey brings us a European Edition of 'In the Mud'.

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The guys do their upmost to find 45 minutes of content from the most boring weekend in Premier League history. Michel Antonio becomes the second West Ham player in as many weeks to throw his name into the hat for 'Under The Floodlights' goal of the season.

There's a deep analysis of Patrick Bamford's hattrick for Leeds and whether young Patrick's just a very average football player or in fact the most intelligent striker the game's ever seen.

Marcus Rashford MBE receives more praise for his work off the pitch (if you're of the opinion that feeding starving kids is good...) meanwhile for the second consecutive week, Darren has some strong words for Marcus' colleague and teammate Donny Van de Beek.

After throughly attacking the good people at Brighton & Hove Albion in previous episodes, Chris shifts his attention to launching a four-pronged assault on Match of the Day and Bailey's in the mud looks at a possible career change for a world cup winner.

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The boys are back after the international break and nearly everyone drew their match. Pickford's vicious attack on Van Dijk leaves the big man on crutches and Liverpool's title hopes in disarray. Everton stay top of the league thanks to Calvert-Lewin's freakish ability to jump high and score goals.

Gareth Bale marks his return to the Premier League by inspiring Spurs to a famous collapse against West Ham. Lanzini's last minute equaliser sent West Ham players into a frenzy and left David Moyes unable to control his body.

It doesn't take long for the toxic nature of the game to get the best of Christopher as he launches into another (yes another) scathing rant about Brighton before the guys give their views on the Premier League's latest attempt to take more money from our wallets.

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There's a real mix of emotions on today's podcast. Darren puts on a brave face despite his tone throughout the episode making it abundantly clear he’d rather be anywhere else. Chris and Bailey are like kids on Christmas.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we got him... the pod's first Jordan Pickford error. Grab yourself some cake and come join the guys to celebrate the occasion.

In lieu of the usual penalty and handball drama, this week's episode centres around teams who weren't good at football. Fair warning, Liverpool and Manchester Utd fans might find this a tough listen.

The guys show James Maddison some compassion after Ben Chilwell has the time of his life against Palace and Bailey's in the mud involves capitalism and Crash Bandicoot.

Reminder that there will be no podcast next week due to the international break. Normal service resumes 21/10. See you all then.

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Penalties, penalties and more penalties... when are these Premier League players going to learn to keep the arms down? The boys discuss the latest batch of controversial handball and penalty shouts from this weekend's action.

Darren and Bailey finally admit that Leicester aren't bad (that doesn't mean good) and analyse the difficulties Manchester City are having at the back despite still playing aesthetically pleasing football (which as we all know, is all that matters).

Thiago Silva learns the hard way that "you don't get that amount of time in our league" as Chelsea come back from 3-0 to get a draw at West Brom.

Liverpool win. West Ham finally win. And Fulham are down. Bailey's in the mud this week highlights a lesser known way in which COVID's causing havoc for professional-ish football teams.

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A million goals were scored in this week's Premier League fixtures forcing us to consider is any team actually good?

Referees make a name for themselves in week 2, revelling in the opportunity to consult the pitchside screens and put their stamp on the games. The boys discuss all the major talking points including handballs, penalties and Bissouma's flexible hips (we hope Jamal Lewis' face is ok).

In the first of what will be many emotional meltdowns fuelled by blind loyalty this season, Bailey breaks all the rules of this podcast by launching a passionate defence of poor Kepa Arrizabalaga before criticising the UK media for their reporting of Chelsea this week. (We'll endeavour to prevent this type of thing from happening again).

Christopher and Darren end the show speechless after Bailey details who's 'In The Mud' this week.

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Premier League Football is back and in the game of the weekend both Liverpool and Leeds make it impossible to tell if either of them is good or terrible.

Arteta's new signings take Arsenal to the top of the Premier League table and the guys break down Willian's 'assists' as well as Gabriel's debut goal and what it says about him.

The boys dive into the referee and punditry agendas that were on display everywhere in Gameweek 1; everything from VAR conspiracies to Martin Tyler's accusations that poor Kepa Arrizabalaga can't see.

Bailey also explains his first 'In the Mud' of the new season and not for the last time on this podcast, 3 grown adults praise David Silva's hair transplant.

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Football's great if you like validating your self-worth on the weekly performance of a group of wealthy strangers that play for a team you've decided to care for more than others. Under The Floodlights is the show that gets real about the aesthetics of football and the toxic impact of the beautiful game. If you feel like wasting more of your life then come join Bailey, Christopher and Darren each week as they delve deep into the sublime and ridiculous topics within the world of Premier League football (the only league that matters...).

Follow us and get in touch:

E: [email protected]

Twitter: @UTFPodcast

Instagram: @underthefloodlightspod

Blog: Under The Floodlights