“Love is the biggest and best thing that she did — unconditional love." Desmond DeRoo

 EPISODE SUMMARY:

In this episode of the podcast, I had the privilege of speaking with Desmond DeRoo, a 30-year-old currently serving his second prison term in Michigan. Desmond, who was adopted by Sarah DeRoo at the age of five after being in the foster care system, shared his experiences of growing up as a biracial child in a small white town in Michigan. Despite facing intense early childhood trauma and struggles with impulsive behavior, Desmond emphasized the importance of unconditional love and support from his adoptive family, especially his mother, Sarah.

Desmond provided valuable advice for struggling youth, emphasizing the importance of finding one's passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for one's actions. He also highlighted the significance of seeking community support and resources, especially for adoptive parents facing challenges in raising their children.

The episode shed light on the failures of various systems, including the foster care, education, and criminal justice systems, in supporting individuals like Desmond. It underscored the need for greater awareness, empathy, and proactive intervention to prevent marginalized youth from falling through the cracks and entering the prison pipeline.

Overall, Desmond's resilience, wisdom, and commitment to helping others serve as an inspiration for adoptive parents and individuals navigating trauma and adversity. His and his mom’s joint message of hope and empowerment resonates with the importance of building supportive communities and advocating for systemic change to create a more inclusive and compassionate society.

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RESOURCES:

Desmond and Sara’s information:

• Connect with Desmond and Sara through their website: https://lovingdesmond.com/

• Buy their book through Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Loving-Desmond-DeRoo/dp/B0CZPHNS9K

• Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovingdesmondbook/

• Follow on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090386023261

Other Resources:

• Statistics about foster care and prison that were mentioned in the intro: https://cepr.org/voxeu/columns/foster-care-prison-pipeline

• APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: http://UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude

• Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com

• Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/

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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson

Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao

Email questions or comments to [email protected]

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Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption

Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com

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TIME STAMPS:

• 00:00:00 - Introduction: Beth Syverson introduces herself and her role as an adoptive mom, setting the stage for the podcast episode.

• 00:02:41 - Foster Care to Prison Pipeline Statistics: Discussion on the statistics and challenges faced by former foster children in the criminal justice system.

• 00:06:29 - Desmond and Sara's Background: Introduction to Desmond and Sara DeRoo's story, highlighting their experiences with adoption and trauma.

• 00:09:12 - Desmond's Early Trauma and Challenges: Desmond's struggles as a biracial child in a small white town, his impulsive behavior, and encounters with the criminal justice system.

• 00:12:00 - Sara's Parenting Journey: Sara's experiences as a widow raising six adopted kids and blending families, navigating the complexities of adoption.

• 00:19:12 - Impact of Education System on Desmond: Discussion on how the education system failed Desmond and contributed to his path towards prison.

• 00:25:48 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Desmond and Sara share advice for parents, emphasizing the importance of love, support, and seeking help.

• 00:35:16 - Desmond's Advice for Struggling Youth: Desmond offers advice for struggling youth, focusing on finding passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for actions.

• 00:42:09 - Desmond's Future Plans Post-Prison: Desmond discusses his plans post-prison, including working with kids and using his experiences to help others.

• 00:46:55 - Final Thoughts and Advice on Adoption Journey: Desmond and Sara emphasize the importance of community, seeking support, and being open about struggles in the adoption journey.