Send us Fan Mail
There’s a moment where you realize… it wasn’t just about them. It was about how you felt, how you showed up, who you were. And once you see that… everything shifts.
Segment 1—You Liked Who You Were
You didn’t just like them—you liked who you were when you were with them.
More open. More expressive. More present.
That version of you felt real and alive. And that’s what made the connection feel so strong.
Prompt: Who was I when I was around them… and what about that version of me felt so good?
Affirmation: I reconnect with the parts of myself I brought into that connection.
Segment 2—Performance Felt Like Connection
What felt like connection was often effort—trying to be understood or chosen. But effort isn’t the same as connection.
Prompt: Where in my life do I feel like I have to give more or prove more for something to feel meaningful?
Affirmation: I allow connection to feel natural, not earned.
Segment 3—You Got Attached to the Feeling
You weren’t just attached to the person—you were attached to the feeling. The energy. The highs. The way you felt when things were good.
So when you say you miss them… you’re often missing how you felt.
Prompt: What did I feel most strongly in that connection… and why is it hard to let go of?
Affirmation: I understand the difference between a person and a feeling.
Segment 4—What Felt Normal… Was Learned
A lot of what felt “normal” wasn’t. You may have learned to see love as effort, sacrifice, or proving. So when something feels that way… it feels real. Not because it is—but because it’s familiar.
Prompt: What did I learn was “love”… that I’m now starting to question?
Affirmation: I allow myself to redefine what love means to me.
Segment 5—The Shift
Instead of asking “Why do I miss them?” ask: “What did I feel when I was with them?” Because that feeling didn’t come from them. You experienced it through them.
And now you can learn to create it for yourself.
Prompt:
What did I feel in that connection… and where can I start creating that for myself?
Affirmation:
I reclaim the way I felt and give it to myself.
Closing
This doesn’t mean what you felt wasn’t real. It was real. But it didn’t come from where you thought.
And once you see that… you stop chasing the person and start understanding yourself.
Support Unfiltered & Unapologetic🤍
If this episode resonated with you, here are a few ways you can support the show:
- Leave a comment/review/rating on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify or where ever you listen — It helps the podcast reach more people.
- Support monthly via Buzzsprout — your contributions help cover production and keep the show going. 👉Click here
- Shop my digital guide + audio to help you interrupt overthinking in real time — 👉Click here
- Shop my blank journals on Amazon — designed for reflection, healing, and intention. 👉 Click here
- Download my FREE guide for when you are feeling disconnected - 👉Click here
Thank you for listening, sharing, and being part of this community.
Follow the podcast on Tik Tok & IG: @unfilandunapologeticpod
Support the show