Unqualified Adults

The idea of having kids while attending seminary and working full-time seemed impossible to Dru. He was “tapped.” And after four unplanned pregnancies in five years, he realized parenting was harder than feared. But for totally unexpected reasons. In this episode, we explore those unexpected parenthood anxieties with Liz’s former professor Dr. Dru Johnson, who admits, while his children certainly cause anxiety at times, his biggest parenting anxieties stem from an entirely different place: his own imperfections.

Co-hosts Laura and Liz, thankful for the incredible effort and teamwork that makes Unqualified Adults possible, celebrate the awesome accomplishments of Season 2 as they prepare to launch Season 3 in the fall.

While growing old is an inevitable part of life, the fact that our days are numbered rarely crosses our minds until the physical signs of old age begin settling in. And when they do, it’s often terrifying. It doesn’t help that our culture tends to mock and overlook the elderly.

In this episode of unqualified adults, Susan Wickett-Ford will shed some light on the anxieties people struggle with as they grow older.

We hope that hearing from Susan will prompt you to think differently about the experience of aging and help you make the most of your time right now.

What does it mean to build a personal legacy or brand? For many this is a question that hums constantly in the background of school, work, and life. But for Leonel Urcuyo, now on the brink of stepping down from leading a department, the concept never crossed his mind. In this episode we use one man’s story to explore the question: is there a gap in the way we think about how we are perceived between those just entering adulthood and those of an older generation?

Druu writes upbeat music, but what most listeners can’t hear are the insecurities behind his work. An accountant by day and DJ by night, Druu struggles with feeling like a kid and staying true to himself. And while he has found ways of coping, it’s never easy to stay in a good headspace. There is always someone to knock him right out of it.

Shortly after graduating from NYU, Anya’s dad became seriously ill from what was expected to be a routine knee surgery. While her mom continued working to pay the bills, Anya stepped in as her father’s primary caretaker. Watching a loved one suffer took a toll on her well-being and forced her to grow up in a way that she says may not have been for the better.

For Tahia, playing the comparison game is tempting—but she knows she’d drive herself crazy if she spent time wishing she was like her peers with American parents. Instead, Tahia has decided to embrace the differences between her American world and her Bangladeshi world, focusing on the privileges she has. But living in these two worlds often makes it difficult for Tahia to decipher her motivations. Gratitude, guilt, and the desire for stability often influence her—and she wonders: will I lose touch with who I really am?

As a child of Bangladeshi immigrants, Tahia equates adulthood with responsibility. Her parents sacrificed nearly everything to provide her opportunities, and though Tahia feels overwhelmed with gratitude, she is caught in a tension. A tension between seeking happiness and building generational wealth for her family. Can she find a way to align these goals?

With the benefit of hindsight, Diane is able to look back at her life and identify patterns of things she would’ve done differently. She often felt like she wasn’t being an active participant in her own life. Diane’s advice to those just entering adulthood? Try to view points of change as opportunities to steer your life in the direction you want it to go, and not to be afraid to go against the expectations of others (though she admits this is easier said than done!).

Growing up in a big family, Diane often felt like she was disappearing. Her constant desire for attention and validation as a child followed her into her teen years when she was approached to be a model. But feelings of inadequacy and loneliness didn’t magically fade away once she started getting paid to look beautiful—quite the opposite. In fact, Diane came to understand that maybe loneliness is just part of the human condition.