Unspoiled! Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Oh hey, Money didn't hate this episode. Apparently Buffy wants a hobby, because killing vampires and not doing her homework leaves her with so much downtime that she needs a new hobby to keep busy. Giles isn't having it, because he's a voyeuristic man ho needs to control the life of the Slayer. Luckily he seems pretty on the ball when it's time to break a spell on Buffy, but still, there's a creepy vibe to him, Why does he have an opinion on Buffy's cheerleading status? So the twist is that Amy's mom has body-swapped with her daughter, and is casting nasty spells to put her on the cheerleading squad, even though she doesn't seem to really have the talent for it. But whatever. There's a cartoony, low-stakes feeling to this episode, and if this is the kind of material we're going to get out of the show, Money finds it a welcome change. The pilot pretended to be high-stakes and dangerous, but it felt sloppy and silly, whereas if you embrace the absurdity and don't take it too seriously, you end up with a more entertaining hour of television. Bravo, show, you are now in comfortably mediocre territory.

Buffy the Vampire slayer . . . . Holy cow . . . why do you people do this to me? Hi, It's Money, and I'm really starting to miss Alias right about now. This first episode is quite shaky. Like mayonnaise flavored jello. Really really white, not appetizing at all, and a foundation made of questionable choices. I'm feeling the pain that Bitches had- being the unspoiled one can really suck sometimes, especially when what you just watched was as unsatisfying as mayonnaise and ricotta spread on crumpets and saltines, and a bottle of room-temperature Aquafina to wash it down. While high on meth. (Trust me, that metaphor will make sense if you listen). Buffy is in the title, though, so I don't need to give her a derisive nickname. I am excited to find out what all the hubbub was about, but Bitches tells me the first season sucked. And you patrons are the ones that said we should go through this episode by episode, so . . . I hate you all. This episode is VERY low budget, and I was a bit disappointed to see one of my favorite actors (Eric Balfour) exit the show so quickly. And lets be honest, this was a hot mess. Poorly lit, poorly choreographed, poorly shot. And the plot seems to try to ramp up but sort of peters out without much of a climax. But I can see the beginnings of Joss Wheadon start to emerge, which I'm enjoying. I hope to see more of his personality start to come through. I loved Dollhouse and Cabin in the Woods is a masterpiece of meta-fiction. But what you guys wanted was a hate-cast of the first season, and that's what you're getting. So buckle in, guys. And get the wine ready. I'm going to need it. And a big straw.