Vegan Warrior Princesses Attack!

Are you someone who doesn’t want kids? Do you get a lot of shit for it? The girls talk about all the weird ways society tries to make people who don’t want kids feel bad.

In This Episode

Nichole and Callie, inspired by our listener Kim and an article over on Bustle called The One Thing That Scares Me About Not Wanting Kids, talk about not wanting kids and all the bullshit that comes with telling people.

Popular media represents childless people as immature, irresponsible and selfish, but this isn’t the case. Our culture uses scare tactics to try to make us think that not having kids will be a huge mistake, or that we won’t be able to find a partner, or that we’ll never mature. But most people who don’t want kids, don’t want them for good reasons. Being clear of what you do and don’t want in life, and being able to communicate it to others is the height of maturity.

As women, we are all too aware of the stereotypes and presumptions that are put on women around having or wanting children. We tried to get the male perspective on this experience through polling our guy friends on Facebook and reading this informative, thoughtful article by Rob Greenfield on why he got a vasectomy at age 25.

Included is an interview with a couple, Holly from Rise & Resist and her partner Ed, who are proudly child-free and are getting a vasectomy in early January to make it official and permanent. Holly and Ed have had a great experience with their friends and family being open about not wanting kids, providing an encouraging view of how things could be.

Links and Information

News

* FDA Issues New Rules for Fruit and Vegetable Production (VegNews)

* Fat-Shaming Cards Handed Out on the Tube (The Guardian)

Mentioned in the episode

* Rob Greenfield: Why I Got a Vasectomy at 25 (RobGreenfield.tv)

* The One Thing That Scares Me About Not Wanting Kids (Bustle)

* Holly Noll is on the Rise & Resist podcast; she and Ed Bauer are coach/owners of PlantFit Strength and Conditioning in Oakland, CA.

Related Content

A compelling case for paid maternity leave, and another layer to the hypocrisy: we’ll pressure you to have kids, but then provide no support for you to spend time with them or heal from the delivery.

In this diet-obsessed world, it’s difficult navigating an eating disorder or maintaining recovery from one. The girls discuss ways to avoid triggering a loved one, some maybe not as much.

In This Episode

In the immortal words of Kelly: Don’t be a deck!

Inspired by the amazing Rise & Resist episode How to be an Ally to Someone with an Eating Disorder, Nichole and Callie wanted to cover the other side of ED support, which is what NOT to do or say. The girls both suffer from various eating disorders and have experienced a lot of unfortunate, and largely unintentional, triggering episodes with friends, family, coworkers, and even random strangers.

Trigger Warning!

We’ll try to be careful with our words today but we will be giving examples of things not to say, which could unintentionally be triggering. If you are in a vulnerable place, this might be an episode to skip.

Preface

Before we jump into it, understand that eating disorders are mental illnesses, no different than addiction, PTSD or depression. They are minimized heavily in our culture, but they are very real and very damaging. We are doing this episode because we see the ways that our culture is essentially built to be one giant non-stop trigger, and we hope that together, we can all start dismantling that. But in order to be successful, we have to start with the premise that eating disorders (EDs) are mental illnesses, and not something more trivial.

We will go so far as to say that a lot of these things are great things to stop doing or saying in general. You don’t know who has an eating disorder out in the world, and a lot of what our culture does as a norm are things that add to the constant pressure. So take note, as we go along, and see if there are ways that you can maybe change the way you interact with the world and other people to start moving the focus towards something safer and more constructive than the physical shit we usually focus on.

DON’T

* With that being said, the first item on our list is don’t say things like “just eat more” or “just stop eating so much.” This may sound obvious, but I’ve had partners say this to me, especially about not eating so much. That’s like telling an alcoholic “stop drinking so miuch and you’ll be fine.” It’s a mental illness, saying dismissive things like this feeds the person’s shame and makes them feel gross and misunderstood.

* Similarly, Don’t make assumptive remarks about eating disorders: Anorexics don’t have strong willpower, they are not vain or attention seeking. Bulimics and over-eaters don’t lack willpower, they are not lazy or just need to eat less. The idea of will power and dieting is generally harmful and should just go away.

* Don’t EVER talk numbers EVER! Weight, calories, measurements, sizes – yours, theirs, anybody’s. PR’s (personal records) can be triggering, too. It’s ok to say you PR’d, but don’t volunteer the numerical deets unless asked.

* Don’t tell someone they look good or look bad after weight gain or loss. Commenting on people’s bodies in general is a no no.

* Don’t encourage extreme diets in them or anyone else. Juice cleanses, fruit fasts, etc. Extreme diets like this will only make the EDs worse. People with eating disorders need to learn balance and to be in tune with their bodies; extreme diets are the opposite of this.

* Don’t put judgement words on foods – “bad” “naughty” “clean” “good.” As Lacy Davis of Super Strength Health says, “Clean is for your underwear, not your food.”

* Similarly, stop with the body talk. Stop saying you feel “bloated” “fat” “disgusting” “gross” or “light” “airy” “clean.”

Stumped on what to buy the special vegan in your life? Want to give your loved ones vegan gifts they’ll love? Looking for something special to buy yourself? We gotcha covered! The princesses discuss their recommended vegan gifts for 2015!

In This Episode

Callie and Nichole have compiled all of their top vegan gift recommendations, broken into category. These gifts span a wide range of price levels and interests. While some will be good specifically for vegans, most are just great gifts that anybody would love – making them perfect for buying gifts for non-vegans that you can feel good about.

From luxurious to practical, please enjoy our gift recommendations!

Makeup & Beauty

Lipstick

* Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics Lip Tar

Lip Tar and Lip Tar RTW are highly pigmented, liquid lipsticks, designed for make up artists. They come in a wide range of gorgeous and unique colors that last all day.

Lip Tar has semi-staining properties, so even as they wear off, you will still have color until you remove it. This is the product you buy if you want an all day lipstick or you want a crazy color like navy blue with sparkles, or a hot neon pink (which is Nichole’s favorite shade, called ‘Anime’), though they do have several everyday shades that you could wear to work.

– Huge sale on Lip Tar and Stained Gloss right now – 50% off!

– Lip Tar RTW in 25 crazy shades

* Red Apple Lipstick

Red Apple Lipsticks are beautiful, smooth and easy to apply. All products are vegan and gluten-free. They sell lip brushes, exfoliating sticks, and an amazing lip balm, all to help you achieve the perfect lip. Their colors aren’t as crazy as Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics, but the lipstick is easier to apply for people who aren’t super experienced, and they do have really fun colors, Hollypeno (bright true red) and Coral Crush are two of my favorites.

The colors are much easier for everyday or corporate environments, great lipsticks to have in your purse.

Red Apple Lipstick provides a ton of information to it’s customers on how to apply lipsticks properly, which is awesome because Nichole learned she was doing it wrong and now can apply lipstick like a pro!

Mascara

* 100% Fruit Pigmented Pure Mascara (Black Tea Color)

100% Pure is an organic, vegan, gluten-free makeup and beauty company that bases it’s beauty products on antioxidants and natural ingredients. They use cruelty-free honey in some products, but not in their mascara, so if your giftee avoids all honey, be on the lookout in the ingredients.

Their black tea fruit pigmented mascara is Nichole’s favorite mascara ever. It separates, lengthens and defines each lash. This mascara does NOT thicken! This is for people who want to define their lashes without adding bulk.

Lotion / Body Wash / Scented Items

* Pacifica

Pacifica products are vegan and cruelty-free. They have lotions, body washes and perfumes, as well as gift sets, makeup and skincare.

Callie is obsessed with their body lotion! It’s amazing for dry skin and comes in wonderful scents, Tahitian Gardenia being her absolute favorite.

They have the same scents across different products, which means you can build nice gift sets that include a body wash, lotion and perfume, all in the same set so your giftee can layer scents and feel totally pampered.

Face / Hair / Body / Beauty

Are you a newbie vegan who’s heading towards your first holiday back home with your family? Are you a veteran vegan dreading the meat-fest and micro-aggressions? No matter what phase of veganism you are in, Callie and Nichole got you covered in our vegan holiday survival guide!

In This Episode

Callie and Nichole break down how to survive the holidays as a vegan visiting non-vegan family and friends:

Having “The Talk”

It’s important to prep your family and yourself ahead of time. Have a talk well before the holiday and the visit to set the expectations and give them time to acclimate and prepare.

* Be firm and unapologetic

* Set boundaries and keep them

* Don’t be confrontational, but do be strong and proud

Surviving the Meat Fest

If your family won’t eat vegan with you, make sure to have enough food for the entire trip so that you aren’t hungry or stuck with unsatisfying food. If it works for you and your family, you can volunteer to cook or suggest recipes for them to make, but no matter what your situation, make sure you can eat!

* Give your family a shopping list or go grocery shopping when you get there

* If you are traveling a long way, make sure that you will be able to eat getting off the plane/train/car

* Get something special for the holiday so you have something to indulge in while others are indulging

* Don’t try to replace family favorites with vegan versions, at least the first year or two

Making it Fun

It’s important to take the focus off of food and make sure to have fun with your family. We get so wrapped up in the food traditions of the holidays, it’s easy to forget that the holidays are really about being together and doing things we enjoy together.

* Make plans to do fun things before your trip so you all have things to look forward to

* During card games, movies, puzzles, sports games, try to contribute vegan snacks for everyone to enjoy

* Find an ally who can help you keep the excitement over non-food activities high

Not Going Home

If you just aren’t feeling it this year, it’s totally ok to not go home for the holiday. If you don’t go back, make sure to have fun!

* Say what you are doing, don’t focus on what you’re not doing (i.e., going home)

* Be firm, non-apologetic, but kind

* Make possible travel plans for the future on a non-holiday

* Do something fun: potluck with friends, take a trip somewhere you’ve always wanted to go, stay home and veg out

If you follow our tips, you’ll have the best holiday possible in weird circumstances. Please reach out to us for support or to share success stories, we’d love to share them on the show!

Links and Information

News

* World Health Organization: Processed meat can cause cancer; red meat probably can (CBS News)

* Chemicals in Meat Cooked at High Temperatures and Cancer Risk (National Cancer Institute)

* Ex-McDonalds CEO Joins Vegan Startup (Business Insider)

* Animal Now Legally Recognised as Sentient Beings in Australia (MSN)

Mentioned on the Show

We talked about my friend Jonathan Levy’s blog, Zero Waste Guy, which has great easy vegan recipes and tips on living a low-to-no waste lifestyle.

Caitlyn Jenner emerged into a world seemingly ready to embrace gender fluidity, but Rachel Dolezal experienced only rage regarding her elective racial transformation. Have we evolved to where ALL identity, even racial, is fluid? And how does this impact those who want to wear the vegan label?

In This Episode

Nichole read an article by Camille Gear Rich on CNN.com titled “Rachel Dolezal has the right to be black” and it made her think deeply about identity in the 21st century: what do we have the right to choose for ourselves? Deeply moved by Gear Rich’s straightforward language and her comparison of Caitlyn Jenner to Rachel Dolezal, she found ways that she could relate to identity issues in her own life, and also how this question extends to veganism and whether we really have the right to tell people what they are or are not.

Nichole relates to this in a small but heartfelt way – as someone who identifies deeply as Italian American, but is in reality only 25% Italian, she has experienced a lot of judgement and anxiety around claiming an ethnicity that some would deny her.

If someone wants to identify as female, black, Italian or vegan – who are we, really, to judge? Shouldn’t we instead celebrate that we have evolved to the point where people are able to slip into the labels and skins that feel right for them?

Links and Information

News

* SeaWorld Stock Falls as Tank Expansion Approved, Whale Breeding Banned (San Diego Channel 6 News)

* The Meat Industry Is Licking Its Chops Over Obama’s Massive Trade Deal (Mother Jones)

Interesting Related Articles

* Racial Dysphoria: Jess Row’s novel explores a world where racial reassignment surgery is becoming commonplace (Slate)

As a vegan, it’s hard to know how much to tell other people’s kids when you get the inevitable questions.

In This Episode

Inspired by Mr. Brian’s question on the advice column, Nichole and Callie discuss whether it’s appropriate to be truthful, to the point of being blunt, with other people’s children on controversial topics. Is telling a kid “I don’t eat animals” too honest? Is that planting a seed or just rocking the boat?

As activists, should we be worried about the consequences of what tension might be caused by presenting children with information that differs from what their parents may be teaching them? The girls discuss what might happen if people were not allowed to confront kids with information their parents don’t agree with. Nichole also makes a strong case for parents staying open to having those difficult conversations with their kids, that doing so will create a safe space for the kids to learn critical thinking skills and will ensure the parents are able to stay part of the conversation.

Links and Information

News

* Vegan Food at Starbucks (VegNews)

* Certified Vegan Options at Taco Bell (VegNews)

* Hard Rock Cafe Introduces Veg Options (VegNews)

* Expired Food Grocery Store (Huffington Post)

An article in the Chicago Tribune titled “Meat lovers rejoice, you’re winning the war” caused Nichole to want to talk about how people use inflammatory language like “war” to prevent sophisticated conversations about hot topics from happening.

In This Episode

Calling efforts to have sustainability factored in to the government’s nutritional guidelines a “war on meat” is needlessly inflammatory. Posing vegans as people who are warring meat, versus concerned citizens who are attempting to fight climate change, instantly paints us as the enemy and prevents any real dialogue from occurring.

This tactic is used often, most notably on gun control. Often attempts at gun control are framed as a “war” on constitutional rights, rather than an attempt to fix terrible issues in our country (the U.S.) such as public shootings. Whatever side of the issue you are on, it’s shortsighted to think that an open and honest conversation about gun control desperately needs to happen. This was made very clear to Nichole when she recently read a Washington Post article about a Pre-K teacher doing school shooting drills with her very young students, wondering how to keep them quiet so they wouldn’t be killed were there a shooting to happen. Powerful stuff, and something that cuts through the chatter of personal rights to ask the larger, and pressing question: what are we going to do about this?

Let’s not be brainwashed by mainstream media. Let’s all cut through this polarizing language to find ways to talk on both sides of the issue and still be heard by our opponents. Nothing will change if we are all viewing the other side as someone infringing on our personal freedoms, instead of being someone asking important questions and desperately seeking reasonable answers to those questions.

Links and Information

News

* 2016 Emoji Candidates Include Vegan Options (VegNews)

* WIN! Vegan Cashew Ice Cream Arrives at 2,000 Walmart Locations! (One Green Planet)

Bernie Sanders may be making waves with the younger generations in our country, but many people are claiming that they won’t vote for him because he can’t win. At what point do you need to be brave and stand up for a movement, even if you think it’s never going to become the majority?

In This Episode

Inspired by the TED Talk video embedded below, Callie wanted to talk about how every movement needs people to be brave enough to step up and join their ranks early on.

Bernie Sanders has been gaining a lot of attention from Millennials and Gen Xers. Despite the fact that many in this age range think Bernie is an outstanding candidate and can find zero fault with him, many have expressed that they think voting for him is foolish and a waste, because he “can’t” win. We think that’s foolish. If everyone who believes in Bernie votes for him and influences those around them to learn about his policies, he might be able to win. And even if he doesn’t, a clear message will have been sent: America is ready for something new.

Whatever your politics, the girls explore this mindset and how it relates to veganism. We’ve heard from many people that they know veganism is the way to go, but feel overwhelmed by the fact that they might be the only one doing it.

So it’s important to be brave. You’re not the only one stepping forward for a movement, you may just be the first. Remember that we all have the ability to influence those around us.

Be the first to dance, or be the first to join the “lone nut.”

Links and Information

News

* Miley Cyrus Planning Naked Concert With The Flaming Lips (Huffington Post)

* After Firestorm, Pork Roast is Back on the Menu at Federal Prisons (Washington Post)

Video

The TED Talk that inspired it all!

[ted id=814]

Conversations with carnists are rife with frustrations, perhaps none more so than being told that the facts you are spouting are “opinion,” or having someone’s unsubstantiated opinions being thrown around as fact. The girls discuss some of the most common carnist “facts” and vegan “opinions” and how to respond to them.

In This Episode

Our dear friend Katie B inspired this episode, the topic was her idea and a great one at that. She sent us this comic, which cracked us up. So many times, as a vegan, you are privy to information that others are ignorant to, whether willfully or by happenstance. Trying to impart that knowledge on others is always tricky, particularly when the other party refuses to see facts as fact and insist that the truth you’re spilling all over them is opinion. Equally infuriating is when carnists push their opinion as fact.

Topics covered in this episode:

Carnist “facts” that are actually opinion

* “We’re on top of the food chain”

* “We needed meat to evolve”

* “There’s no health risks in eating meat”

* “Hunting is necessary”

* “We’ve ALWAYS eaten meat”

Vegan “opinions” that are actually facts

* “Factory farming harms the environment”

* “Eating fish is extremely harmful”

* “Animals have feelings and emotions, and experience pain”

Links and Information

News

* Bill Requires Labs to Retire Cats and Dogs from Testing Passed in California (One Green Planet)

* Meat-Loving Republicans Cowed the White House Into Ignoring Expert Nutrition Advice (Slate)

Articles and Research

* [Chart] Carnivore, Omnivore and Herbivore

* [Video] Deer Hunting: Overpopulation Solution or Cause? (Bite Size Vegan)

* [Article] Why you can all stop saying meat eating fueled evolution of larger brains right now (Evolving Health Science)

* Cowspiracy: Facts from the Movie on the Environmental Impact of Animal Consumption

* Homo Naledi: This Face Changes the Human Story. But How? (National Geographic)

Compliments are nice, but our culture of constantly commenting on each other’s appearances can be harmful. Being, or going, vegan seems to invite comments on our appearance, and even when those comments are complimentary, that can be a lot of pressure, especially for those of us that suffer from body image issues.

In This Episode

Inspired by an article in Washington Post about the effects of the compliments that we give little girls, Nichole wanted to discuss what it’s like having body dysmorphic disorder (information and resources below) and trying to navigate a world that focuses on appearances when most days, all she wants to do is forget that she has an appearance.

Together, we could change this. Start in your social group: focus on what you enjoy about the people you love instead of how they look. Comment on a contagious smile, and infectious laugh, an eye for mixing prints. It’s of course ok to let someone know you think they are beautiful, but we can stop making appearance the very first thing we comment on, and we can give people space to lose weight or try a new hair cut without feeling like they’re being watched.

Links and Information

News

* Brown University Fraternity Goes Vegan For a Week (VegNews)

* Learn Anatomy By Dissecting Knitted Animals (I Fucking Love Science)

Body Dysmorphic Disorder Resources

* Body Dysmorphic Disorder Symptoms (Mayo Clinic)

* What Causes BDD? (Kids Health)

* Getting Help (BDD Foundation)

* Body Dysmorphic Disorder Support Groups (+supportgroups)