break the earth's crust and plant a dead seed

dry grounds thirst for water

all the sand roughens the throat

this is the loneliness of a blooming flower in the desert

there is no one to witness this blossom

all this green and glow is a beacon of hope below the surface

how did you grow out of the cracks meant to suffocate?

what godly amount of will is in this beauty of your flower?

you have found a place deep below the surface

a place where water flows and nutrients grow

a place where the light does not touch

the fertile and solid place where roots are formed

keep your face to the sun o sunflower

as you have sprung from the depths of darkness to the light

the rays of glory kiss your petals with light and glow

your focus is the light of the sun.

When I look to the sky, that is all there is

What if everything below the sky is background

And the sky is the main character of this Earth play

What is my act in this?

God, the bible says so.

I have looked for a word so real and so sure

I have spoken words from my mouth

I have prophesized through my lips

and yet...

No words are sure as the one written in a book

oh they may tarry, they will tarry

until my heart faints with quarry and love

then i abandon my desire and live life itself

i return to the realm of miracles

after asking for miracles

this is the recipe

this is the truth

i love the way you hold a cigarette

like you care loosely but still want to smoke anyways

your necklace looks like bondage art

your hair, a good choice knowing that you love to know people are looking

the ring on your index finger,

you're single forever with your heart still beating puddles of love and affection

your shoulders, built for the head that carries your angelic face

your dreamy eyes make me melt

...

Real Life, No Robbery

Life is robbery

steal and attach, steal and attack

The highest form of peace is war

to turn over leaves and doors

Life is pain

excited to feel it

the music interwoven with it

hear it in my voice, see it in my choice

Life is gain

I am all that is inside of me

I am a mirror reflection of me

mirror, mirror, who is the fairest of them all?

Life is rain

reality is the great fall of consciousness

death is the seed that sprouts into fruits

...

This episode is dedicated to anyone who has been a victim of abuse - physical, domestic, emotional - of any kind. God sees you.

The content of this episode does not directly explore the topic of abuse, but it is an offering nonetheless.

This is an episode exploring the childhood to now-adult experience of having a relationship with my dad.

Three stages of this experience:

1. Idolize: Everything I know, learnt, observed, came from this man.

2. Demonize: Everything that is wrong is the fault of this man.

3. Humanize: He is human, too. He makes mistakes; this is his first life experience, and he deserves mercy and leniency, the one I want for myself.

More Money, More Progress.

What is this episode about? The madness that is called life, the beautiful, painful, and gorgeous experience that we live every day, encountering ourselves against people as the mirror reflection that they are.

I face myself every day. I see limitations in my being and fear mongers in my thoughts. I feel heartbreak residue in my heart, I feel the dark dust of worry and anxiety, I feel the pain of having some, not enough.

Welcome to another episode of ABLE.

"I trust myself". These words to me echo forbidden confidence in myself, the great self-critiquing accuser of all. All I have been waiting for has been waiting in my peace of mind, and I have strayed from peace of mind because of the fear of other people's opinions and expectations of me.

Self-abandonment hurts deeper than heartbreak, and that's what I feel heals when I say "I trust myself"; I am returning home.

I love dropping these episodes because they are pieces of my heart.