Very Best You

This unedited, real-time episode is an honest reflection of the blessings that are always found in humbling yourself and being honest about what you need from others.

If you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with - are you spending time with the right people? This episode shares six tips for how to raise your average by expanding your network with other generous and ambitious women who can enrich your life in every area.

Connect with connectors

Talk to strangers

Be a giver of value

Join a community

Know who you want to be friends with

Reach out regularly

Resources shared in this episode:

Untamed, Glennon Doyle

Quench Community by Grace Blacksea

Self Care Society

This episode is in honor of Mother’s Day, but is intended for all women regardless of their biological status as a Mother. We discuss the value of women as the leaders of our generation and the generations to come and how much we have to offer because of our inherent compassion combined with our ambition.

There’s real talk about the inequities we experience when we chase professional dreams and feel like we’re leaving our loved ones behind and how we deserve to treat ourselves better no matter what our job title is or the season of life we’re in. This week is intended to inspire, encourage and uplift women for Mother’s Day and always because we deserve it. We run the world, girls!

Sources mentioned in this episode:

The Moment of Lift by Melinda Gates

Reese Witherspoon on Instagram

Beyonce - Run the World (Girls)

 When we’re consistent, it means we’re doing what’s required now to achieve a better outcome in the future.

When we know the reasons why consistency is an important habit to have, we can take steps to develop it. This is true about everything, really. But knowing how important consistency is to our long term success really can drive this behavior.

 We can achieve great things if we’re consistently making smart decisions and taking the right actions. That doesn’t mean that we won’t make mistakes along the way or have seasons where our habits aren’t perfect. This isn’t about perfection at all. It’s about long-term commitment to our desired outcomes.

 Our level of consistency reflects our values and standards.

Five reasons why consistency is an important habit to have.

 1. It develops discipline and self-control. The ability to be consistent requires self-control, which means we don’t allow ourselves to get off track. This will help us develop the discipline required to keep going.

 2. It builds a higher level of trust. The level of trust we have with ourselves shows up in the level of trust others have with us. Being consistent will help build momentum. This means we’ll also feel good about what we’re working towards.

3. It can fast track your improvement or development in any area. Consistency will lead to progress which can speed up the accomplishment of what we want.

 4. It will create accountability. Our results will reveal if we’re consistent or not. This means we can adjust our actions or behaviors and keep progressing towards what we want.

 5. It will help you stand out or be noticed. Small actions carried out repeatedly will amount to big results over time. When we do something for a long period, we will differentiate ourselves from those who aren’t consistent.

There are also several things that can cause us to struggle with consistency. They include:

•  Lack of patience and desire for instant gratification.
• Lack of clarity and focus.
• Not having supporting habits or triggers.
• Having an “all or nothing” mindset.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Self Care Society

Anna Dynia, CPA

The Bible App

Atomic Habits by James Clear

The quote was shared in a March 2021 @selfcaresociety class and stood out as solid life lessons that we can take from dogs. 

• Work like a dog - doing what I was born to do with joy and purpose
• Play like a dog - play with total jolly abandon
• Love like a dog with unabashed devotion.

Leadership is not just a title, it's a posture and a behavior. Every leader started with ideas and dreams and very basic habits and rose to great heights. Great leaders are not supernatural and they are not different than you. They simply recognize their abilities and believe in themselves. For some reason women struggle to identify as leaders and we are leaving lots of positive influence on the table by not owning our roles.

The very best version of you is constantly considering how you can serve YOURSELF best so that your inspiring service to others is a byproduct of your wholeness. World class leaders know that they are more effective at everything when they are taking care of themselves and you need to follow these leadership rules, too.

 BLESS YOUR BODY with nutritious food, plenty of water and movement that feels good. Peloton is my all time favorite, but any movement that shifts energy through your body is a win.

EXPAND YOUR MIND by reading and listening to everything. More importantly, read anything that is written by people who look and vote and think differently than you do and then post about it and talk about it and lead people to greater tolerance and compassion.

CHANGE YOUR SCENERY. Go to a different grocery store. Try a new coffee shop. Listen to a sermon by a different minister. Eat salad for breakfast and pancakes for dinner. 

BE GRATEFUL. Taking a consistent posture of gratitude is a great way to influence others in a positive way. When people see you living in constant gratitude they are more likely to see the beauty around them too. 

The best way to lead and influence others is to care deeply for yourself first. The compassion you foster and energy you generate will be more abundant when it comes from a place of true wellness and self-love.

In a world where we are constantly seeing bigger, better, filtered beauty it's easy to forget that we have so much to be thankful for. We can be thankful for what we have RIGHT NOW while we're working for what we want. This episode taps into the simple practice of gratitude as a mood booster, personal development tool and accelerator of excellence on even the worst days.

The guidelines for adding this practice to your life are:

1. Make it a habit.

I have used all of these gratitude journals daily and recommend them all depending on where you are in your practice. When you can't find something you love, just use a spiral notebook and write three things daily that you are thankful for.

The Five Minute Journal

Favorite Moment a Day

The Start Today Journal

Spiral Bound Notebook

2. Make it simple

Not grand gestures and expensive gifts. The focus is on things that are already happening in your life - great coffee, amazing slippers, cute dogs, sun shining on a Tuesday. The simpler the better.

3. Be thankful for the contrast

This practice comes from my classes with Danika Brysha in Self Care Society  The contrast is things that aren't so great that show you what you don't want and inspire to push towards what you do want.

4. Look for the good all the time everywhere you go

Every moment of the day is an opportunity to see things to be thankful for. The more goodness you look for in the world the more you will surely see.

Sometimes starting small is the only way to make any progress towards our dreams and goals. We don't have to have all of the answers , but we have to be courageous enough to start where we are, with what we have in front of us right now.

There will always be a million reasons not to start, but we can overcome it all by starting now and learning how to get better along the way. PROGRESS BREEDS PRIDE. Every time we do a hard thing or a simple thing we are proving to ourselves that we are capable of commitment and worthy of praise.

Start now and get closer to being the very best version of you.

We can have it all, but there are some seasons of life where the overwhelm and frustration can just be too much to manage and will keep you from being the best version of yourself. Join Kim Montoya each week as she shares tips and tricks for developing habits to keep you on track and maintaining perspective for enjoying life. If you know life can be better, but don’t know how to get there or just need a reminder that you’re not alone, this show is for you.