Warm Lasagna

A fried bologna sandwich, as delicious a comfort as it is, might seem like an unusual pick for a chef’s favorite food. For Matt, though, it was one of the first dishes he learned how to cook, and one which inspired him to eventually go on to culinary school. From the time he was a young boy and could barely reach the table, he was making biscuits with his grandmother and helping prepare meals for his family. “I love the science behind it,” he says ,and he can’t imagine himself doing any other job. Matt went to culinary school right after high school and has been working in the industry ever since. 

Matt shared his perspective on the impact COVID has had on restaurants, particularly at the start of the pandemic when the governor’s orders were rapidly changing and restaurants had to adapt quickly to stay in compliance. “One of the hardest days in my career was having to call everybody and tell them they didn’t have a job. You didn’t do anything, but you don’t have a job. It’s hard enough to do that for one person, but then you have to do it for fifty people.” We talked about the importance of eating and shopping local, and the value of empathy and kindness. After all, “It doesn’t cost you anything to say ‘thank you.’” Last year, Matt also lost his grandfather to the virus. We talked about how strange it was not to be able to gather and band together, even in grief, and discussed strategies for maintaining community despite distance. 

It’s hard to know where things are going, even in 2021. “I don’t think the restaurant industry will ever be the same.” We remain hopeful that the vaccine’s reach will be enough to slow the spread of COVID-19. For Matt (and previous podcast guest, Jordan) this year will bring a wedding! But for now, we’ll continue to support the local business we know and love, letting empathy be our guide in all matters. 

Note: We recorded this episode back in December 2020

Sasha worked in restaurants most of her life, usually as a server or bartender, but she always longed to cook. When her mother died unexpectedly in 2019, Sasha’s grief caused her to question everything, including the direction her life was taking. As a way of honoring her mom, Sasha decided it was time to pursue her long-time dream of opening her own vegan food truck. She launched in early 2020, right as COVID was wreaking havoc on the food and beverage industry. 

Soul Miner’s Garden is a vegan food truck committed to compassion and environmental consciousness. Why vegan and sustainable?  “I’m trying to stay true to myself.” This means selling no animal products whatsoever, and exclusively using boxed water, biodegradable packaging, and bamboo cutlery. Which is an incredible commitment, given the state of today’s world. Sasha shared that although some turn their nose up at the idea of vegan fare, there is lot to be gained. “If you’re not eating meat, you’re not missing protein and you’re not deprived of flavor.” Promoting a healthy lifestyle is important to Sasha, as her mother died from heart disease, and a plant-based diet is effective in reducing diabetes, heart disease, and cancer. 

We talked about the southern tradition of beans and greens, and Sasha maintains that nobody makes greens like her mom did. In fact, she makes a vegan version of her mom’s recipe on the truck. “I know my mom would be proud of me and where I’m at, and I just really wish she were here to see it.” We also discussed the link between food and community, and how COVID has really shifted things for Sasha and her family, personally and professionally. 

There is no doubt that Sasha’s mom would be proud of all she has accomplished - from outgrowing Mecklenburg County’s predictions for her life to running her own thriving business. It is truly a privilege to know this woman, and I cannot wait to see what else is in store for her! Please make sure you are following Soul Miner’s Garden for the most up-to-date information about where they’ll be around town; you will not want to miss out on those greens!  

CORRECTION: In the intro of this episode, Emily incorrectly stated that Sasha has been vegan for 10 years. Sasha has recently reached her 5 year anniversary of eating vegan, however she has dreamed of owning a food truck for about 10 years. 

“I equate food with togetherness.” 

Layla grew up watching her mother make stuffed grape leaves until she made them as an adult with her husband in their first house together. Her preferred way of making them is just like her mom’s - ground beef and rice served with a yogurt dipping sauce. Despite all the work that goes into these beauties, she makes them for nearly every gathering she hosts. Why? Because she loves them and they remind her of home. The entire process takes 4-6 hours; she has been known to put on a movie or show and get to rolling. “I love making them; it’s very relaxing.”  Not only is it fun for her, but it’s a way to take pride in her family’s Egyptian heritage and to make memories with her sons. 

Easter with the family typically involves grape leaves and roasted leg of lamb, with spanakopita, rice, and other sides. We talked about the evolving tradition of these foods, and how Layla loves to adapt to whoever is present at her table. “More than the tradition itself, I want to be sure everyone is welcome to eat at my house.” We discussed the meaning both sets of family have had for her through the years, including this past year when a friend shared a meal with her at Olga’s Kitchen in Michigan when she had to travel to be with her father for emergency surgery. 

Layla is a psychiatrist, so it comes as no surprise that she is extremely intuitive about people. And those who have had the privilege of being close to her have felt her kindness and generosity. We talked in this episode about the challenges of strengthening bonds with the people we love despite social distancing. “Right now that comes in the form of wearing a mask. This is a very strange time because yes, we can share food in these ways, but we can’t have that experience of sitting together, passing the plate. We’re being in community by staying away from each other.” 

What a year it has been! Thank you to each and every one of you who have made this podcast possible for me - from guesting, to listening, to answering technology questions for me. I am eager to continue serving up hot episodes each week in 2021, so thank you for sticking with me. Working on this project to document my friends/family, and to learn more about the way food and community shape culture, has been so much fun! I look forward to digging in with you more in the coming year. 

The person I owe the most gratitude this year is my husband, Robert. Robert may pretend he doesn’t like to cook or that it doesn’t come naturally to him, but as the son of Leanne and Kelly (who we heard from in previously episodes) he is genetically predisposed for greatness in the kitchen. He dazzled me on one of our first dates with seared salmon steak and veggies and sweet potato chili. We have shared meals at many fine restaurants, but my very favorite memories with my husband are those hours we have spent, pouring cup after cup of hot coffee (with a splash of heavy cream) while we pontificate on all of our favorite topics. 

My husband shared in this episode about how he is always wary of “getting above your raising” and the code switch that takes place for him in some circles, as a progressively minded man from the south. “There is this deep southern shame. The south has been scapegoated. It’s easy to say the problems of injustice are things of the south. It’s so clearly there in history, it’s more visible, but it’s all across the US. All of that shame ties into shame about southern accents, which turns into reverse pride and then turns into something that can be misused and really harmful.” 

As a reminder, please continue to listen, share, and rate this podcast if you're still enjoying it! And if you have ideas about how we can improve, or want to share your own story of comfort food and community, feel free to email me at [email protected]. 

My Grandma Lupsor is an incredible woman. My mom has described her as “the perfect mother-in-law,” and she is known throughout our family for generosity, her compassion for others (she has received numerous awards for all of the volunteering she has done through the years), and, of course, her food. She has been a lifelong member of St. George Romanian Byzantine Catholic Church in Canton, Ohio, where she (and my grandpa, when he was living) helped organize numerous weddings, funerals, and events. My grandparents helped keep the books at the church, and my grandfather sang in the choir. 

This episode, my cousin, Katie, joined me and we reminisced about all of our Romanian family favorites - pigs in the blanket (which are cabbage rolls, not cocktail weenies, by the way), doughnuts, crepes, hardtack, chocolate strip, and so many more. My grandma was always telling me, “don’t be bashful” and pushing me toward the epic snack cabinet available exclusively to use grandchildren, stocked with all manner of treats (my favorites were oreos, bugles, and cheese puffs). Katie remembers a lot more of the details than I do, but as we were talking, I felt like I was 7 years old again, sitting with my cousins at the card table in the living room, yelling “GRACE” as quickly as possible, and slurping noodles out of the most delicious bowl of chicken soup I have ever tasted. 

Katie is the leader of a nonprofit organization, a fitness instructor, a marathoner, and the mother of three. She recently got married (yes, during COVID!) and shared all about what the year has been like for her. How has she made it through? By cultivating community, with her family and with her fitness friends. “I think it’s important to stay connected to the things we really love, and the things that motivate us.” Katie, like most of the members of my family, also loves to cook. Specifically loves to bake - especially cookies. Every year she makes and decorates her Aunt Kim’s sour cream cookie sugar cookies, which her mom claims Katie makes better than she does. 

As she reflected on growing up in our family, Katie shared this: “The more I start to reflect, I realize this all makes me who I am. You don’t realize that as a kid. You think, “I’m not going to make the same mistakes as my parents. I've made different mistakes and had different experiences from my parents, but the framework we had growing up was so important. That really shaped me. Embrace your traditions and your culture; that helps you identify with who you are, and to move forward with who you want to be.”

The very first place we learn about how to treat other people is our family of origin, and I am very fortunate to have a beautiful and loving family. This week on the podcast, we hear from my Grandma Mary. This is my mom’s mom and I have been told that she, my mother, and I have similar sounding voices - what do you think? 

Grandma Mary was a Depression-era baby, and her parents were Italian immigrants. This means two things: 1. She can make a killer baked macaroni and 2. She knows how to scrimp and save every penny and crumb to make a delicious meal. This week she talked with me about the importance of using fresh, organic ingredients, something she was doing long before it was cool. We talked about her parents, who were from Rivisondoli, a small mountain town in the Abruzzo region (remember what Shari told us about that?). Grandma has fond memories of delicious food, singing Italian songs, and the integral role of the church in her community. We talked through some of her classic recipes, and the joy that sharing a meal with friends and family brings. “A good meal with good friends - it’s almost a sacred thing, really.” 

Grandma was raised in northeast Ohio in the “Italian Ghetto” as she calls it. She was married at 19, and she had to grow up fast because she went on to have four children. Grandma is an incredibly talented artist, and she is also extremely intuitive when it comes to relationships with people. She is also tough as nails. In thi episode she shared advice about growing one’s own food, cooking meals with simple ingredients (including her delectable meatballs and sauce), and the importance of getting back to the basics of home and family during COVID. 

Party mix is not a difficult thing to make, but it is an important annual holiday tradition for Jordan. “No one makes it like my mom. Your mom may make a good party mix, but it’s not like my mom’s.” Jordan’s mom, Vicki, is sweet enough to pay attention to what everyone in the family likes in the mix; she even makes separate batches for them (Jordan’s favorite are the Cheese Its). This attention to detail is only one of many ways Jordan has felt loved and supported by her mom through the years. Many thanks to Vicki for providing the party mix sampled in this episode. 

This led us into yet another discussion about Love Languages, which Fred touched on last week in our conversations about chitlins. What is this language we are speaking of? If you are interested in learning your love language, you can take the quiz here. 

Jordan is a marathoner. She is a running coach at the Run Far program at Run For Your Life and also serves on the Young Professionals Board of Girls on the Run in Charlotte. In this episode, she shared about how running has shaped her life in a positive way through the encouragement of the community. “Recognizing that you have the same fears and insecurities as other people, then being able to overcome them together, has been one of the most powerful experiences in my life.” You can read more about her journey to becoming a runner here. 

Another fun fact for you about Jordan: she has been a lover of Disney her entire life. When Jordan was a child, her mom worked at the Disney Store, and Jordan fell in love with the stuffed animals and videos there. When she moved away from North Carolina after college, she and her mother made regular vacation meetup plans at Disney to get away from cold midwestern winters. Disney became home away from home for Jordan and her mom. And guess what else: Jordan met her fiancee on a Disney fan site, too! They have the same favorite nighttime show - Fantasmic - and are planning to see fireworks together next year at the 50th Anniversary Celebration in October 2021 after they get married. So sweet! 

Pig intestines are an integral part of cuisine across the globe, however they have a special significance in African-American culture, albeit extremely divisive. Fred remembers the annual holiday debate about whether chitlins would be featured on their family’s Thanksgiving menu. He remembers the multi-day process of preparing chitlins for consumption, including the stench that would take over the entire house, the care with which his mother cleaned and stewed them, and various relatives’ reactions to this dish. 

To some, chitlins seem unappetizing, unhealthful, and associated with slavery. For Fred, they represent resistance and survival. “It’s only been as I’ve gotten older that I realize what was going on. Thinking about that allowed me to fully embrace that history. Thinking back on it gives me a chance to relish in the pride of it. There’s just something about being the underdog that American culture relishes. When you’re African American you don't have to make it up - you weren’t even allowed in the game.” 

Fred grew up in Saginaw, Michigan, which he describes as a “dying factory town; what happens when capitalism leaves you behind.” His mother is from Mississippi, and cooking is her love language. Fred remembers cornbread and greens, and feeling wrapped in a cocoon of her love expressed through food. We talked about the challenges of growing up and developing one’s own identity - specifically learning to appreciate things that society has made us feel ashamed about, especially when it comes ot racial identity. “The story of Black liberation and culture is a great human story, the most American of all the stories. It’s been a process learning to fully embrace it and be full-throated in my promotion of it. 

Thank you, Fred, for sharing your story with us this week. To learn more about the tradition behind chitlins, check out this article from Detroit Free Press. 

My dear friend and mentor, Carrie, is a yoga educator and life coach in Charlotte, NC. She is the co-creator of Explore and Expand, where she leads specially curated travel retreats in exciting locations across the globe (she co-hosts a highly entertaining podcast, too, by the way!) “Basically I feel like that’s why we’re here: to connect, and to let people know that they matter” 

Sonker is a baking traditional dish at the intersection of pie, cobbler, and crumble, which is unique to Surry County, NC, where Carrie is from. Usually made with a juicy berry (such as blackberries) or sweet potato, it has been covered by a number of media sources because of how special it is (including NYT and Our State). There’s even an annual Sonker Festival! For Carrie, it is so much part of the fabric of her family’s life that none of her relatives ever wrote down a recipe; they just know how to make it. 

Carrie grew up in Mount Airy, where no invitation was necessary to visit loved ones. In preparation for this podcast conversation, Carrie decided to make blackberry sonker for the first time, which required lots of research and reviewing of family traditions with various relatives. “It felt special and important and a way of honoring my Mema.” She resisted the urge to purchase versions of the ingredients she perceived as more nutritious, coming to decide that this was not the intention behind sonker. “The intention is to celebrate abundance and delight. When I make this dish, it will be infused with her love and her spirit.” She shared her memories about all the delicious treats available in the glass container at Mema and Pa’s house, and how she has come to appreciate these even more as an adult. 

We spoke more broadly about comfort food, and how food can be a way of expressing love and care to others. Carrie shared stories about the importance of this from her world travels. “Even when you don’t speak the same language with words, you can speak the same language of gratitude and appreciation and connection through that experience.” We also discussed the ways COVID-19 has only deepened her experiences of connection and resiliency. 

Leah is the best coworker anyone could ask for: she is supportive during tough times, she has a great sense of humor, and she loves to take walks/eat lunch outside to break up the day. Even during COVID-era, Leah still leaves treats on my desk on the days she’s in the office! She is so, so thoughtful, intensely creative, and a wonderful friend. In this episode, her son, Whitney, joined us to talk about their family memories and traditions around eating and cooking. Whitney was home, studying for his chiropractic boards, and Leah and her husband have gotten to enjoy his culinary abilities while he’s been visiting. 

We talked about the importance of nutrition and exercise for our physical and emotional wellness. Whitney follows the ketogenic diet, which he became interested in as a young adult after reading David Seaman's book, The Deflame Diet. Leah is also quite health-conscious (despite how great a baker she is), and she shared a number of foods she likes to employ in her home cooking. 

It was such a pleasure to have our first family show! I have only recently seen Leah in-person again, as we start to go back into the office a couple days a week, and it hasn’t been the same without her. Whitney pokes fun at Leah for the period of time in his childhood when his mom was known to make a lot of casserole dishes, however I think it’s a beautiful thing that now, as an adult, he is actually helping her out by cooking several meals a week. Especially during such high-stress and emotionally draining times as these.