Mike doesn't respect Steve, everyone got their tennis photos, tight boy shorts, it only happened for a brief second, we had to shred the tennis photos, Noah felt so small, we have each other, Curt doesn’t want to be on the show, Mike has an open invite for Kristy, you God damn church mouse, Noah uses them as a rag, sorry to our Poland listener, Mike had bones, little bottom boy, sweetie booooys, you can't do that nowadays, son of the computer teacher, whatever you did was the most extreme thing ever, gift days, dinkin' around underneath the deck, see them through the cracks, he was supposed to be a leader, things got out of hand, she forgot to turn off her sign, Taco Bell sold off their stash cache, Steve’s not allowed to talk to Kristy, Noah didn’t know Mike had a computer, usually it’s absolutely horrible.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Try having your molar ripped out of your head, super swolen lips, DSL's, Steve can't do that this week, it started to turn grey, they rub it on your gums, look at how big that root is, Mike has a real bad gag reflex, Mike can't eat anything hard, this whole week is a wash, congratulations—you have pools of blood in your stomach, pry it out with a crow bar, your old red boy, two giant baja's, garbage upon garbage, the good old day, swap seats, Noah's mom stained it, you've got to sling it from the left to the right, it's supposed to be funny, who is more on top of things, Mike becomes a dad, kick them in the shins, already disappointed, preschool fight club, they'd be getting away with this today, Mike—I'm thirsty, Mike will read anything, I would not want to do that on mushrooms

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Photo of Mike's Excised Tooth
• Photo of Mike's Mouth X-Ray
• 9 insane cereal flavors you can only get at Walmart
• Most Stuf Oreos
• Preschool "Fight Club"
• Man Mauled to Death by Lions

Noah has three kids, at least an hour, a brown slug, do not eat the raccoon, Andre the Degenerate, space mountain, sweaty dudes, she does not let him, if I had to kill Mike for $20, the filth that is Mike, threw them up into the rafters, the loudest noise you could possibly hear, can't explain your way out, avoiding eye contact, a million different locks, a whole bunch of priests running out the back door, I guess I'm a hero, instant regret, if you're a nice guy you lose, Curt was wondering, beat red, he had an awful skin color, incendiary device, that'll teach ya to knock, and Mike's giraffe.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Revengers: Intentional knockoffs of Avengers action figures / Boing Boing
• Hulk Hogan (Sterling Golden) vs. Chick Donovan - YouTube
• Ric Flair vs. Chick Donovan - YouTube
• Chick Donovan - Wikipedia
• chick donovan - Google Search
• It's Grum! (3-in-1) | Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! | Adult Swim - YouTube
• Get Off the Shed: New Friends - SNL - YouTube
• Mike's Drawing of a Giraffe

Curt's not really engaging enough, a million and a half zippers, school uniforms, Mike will suck on your sister, if Mike was rich, cheetahs not Cheetos, circus license, Mike needed that for masturbating, bee mortality insurance, this guy seems like a scumbag, imported from Siberia, red pandas, they're in Florida, not such a good idea, provider of animals, Mike's grade school report, estimated time of conception, 12 guys run beside me, the Uber's sons, cool guy zone, not widely distributed yet, hot wet hole, never been more mad, this is all I've got to work with, how many sharpies, no hander lander, nursing home walkers, never going to do that again, George Foreman through the oven, 2 dollar bill, that is awful, Sweet Baby Ray's, burning all of Mike's stuff, and bad thing's about Mike's aunt.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Lester Kalmanson Insurance - Covering the Wild from Alligators to Zebras
• domesticated fox - Google Search
• See Kim's security guards run alongside limo - CNN Video
• Mike's Aunt's Gift

Great summers, clapping in unison, Mike has pink eye, work pits, unachievable goals, poison ivy, waking up in RV's, scrot itch, Mike is nervous, how do snails have babies, momentum, Turbo by Disney, wild wad of snails, Never Ending Story, quick sand, losing a horse, Little Mermaid, Mike is sexually attracted to the bat creature, Robert Smith from The Cure, Noah didn't finish, Jessica Rabbit was too sexual, Mike is a furry, the weirdest place you could ever be, Mike's top five fast food joint, Mike avoid's being noticed, Mike get's caught, it does not happen to Noah, Mike was very young, tranny bell fries, Mike needs to figure it out, Noah's first time, everything was porn, computer class, Noah's brother peed his pants, the algebra 2 teacher's mom, Math Blaster or Mavis Beacon, clenching his butt, Noah's just trying to get home, he was a real wierdo, how to pick up chicks, pink jello, and Mike wants two birthdays and two Christmases.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Snails fucking on my porch - YouTube
• Snail Life Cycle - Snail Facts and Information

Younger brothers, fooling Mike, sexual t-shirts, second puberty, stealing Wi-Fi, Mike's pissed off at firefighters, coincidences, Mike is distraught, blacklists, association of rental people, permanent records, Craigslist, honest dads, kitchen shears vs scissors, the end of Terminator, nicest can opener, sensory on your hand, drawing maps, flip flopping, sleep paralysis, dreams occurring in the room, closet doors swinging open, Noah tries to wiggle his body, self inducing lucid dreams, disrespecting a 90 year old, elder's home orgy, Mike doesn't understand prostitution, regrettable internet searching, Mike is the alpha male, and Mike's phone call.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Video of Mike's House on Fire
• Longtime Grand Rapids firefighter to receive statewide award | MLive.com
• hot 80 year old - Yahoo Image Search Results

Pretending, choking, divorced parents, violent video games, unsanitized objects, hot moms, being irresponsible, non-working toilets, ungrateful children, boyfriends trying, doing taxes, cleaning gutters, gas station food, unobtainable things, meatloaf sandwich, family dinners, being rejected, boy scouts, regrets, learning knots, a place you can't escape from, Mike is handy, giving up, dirty Santas, Alaskan surveyors, writing in code, girls only, Mike feels weird, cereal mascots, desiccant packets, accidental peeping, liberal mothers, teachers having babies, assumed knowledge, homeschooling, and Stretch Armstrong.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Amazon.com: Stretch Armstrong Action Figure: Toys & Games

Brushing teeth, diet coke, female masking, top 5 weirdest things you've seen, sounding, super glue, kidney stones, ransomware, Stephen Hawking, vomit comet, Tony Hawk, Lou Gehrig, vocoder voices, angry Germans, first times, fixing the internet, awkward days, Mike hates Curt, reputations, living together, saving money, blowing up car engines, going deaf, ignoring advice, losing keys, reckless driving, greasy fingers, automatic presses, wisdom tooth, Tennessee dentist, worst injuries, and scars from spiders.

With Noah, Stephen, and Mike.

All music by Jake Simons

Links:

• Mike's iPhone Screenshot
• Stephen Hawking - Wikipedia
• Physicist Stephen Hawking in Zero Gravity NASA - Stephen Hawking - Wikipedia
• Lou Gehrig - Wikipedia