We Have Darkvision

On this week’s episode of ‘We Have Darkvision′ The Gang hangs around Wolf Rock while making some very important business decisions, some equipment decisions and destination decisions.  They also decide to join an exclusive club. Look, this is a very decision heavy episode.

If someone told you they found a snake with legs, you'd probably say "Umm, that's a lizard you moron." And then they would reply "No, it's a Behir."

They'd show you a picture and you'd probably say "Oh, look at the little guy. I'd put him in my terrarium. He's kinda cute, like a weird salamander goat."

And then they'd say "Oh no, sorry. I should have put a banana in there for scale. This thing is like 30 feet long."

And then you'd mess your pants because it's standing right behind you.

Join Kyle and Alex to find out if this lightning snizzard is a friend or a fiend.

On this week’s episode of ‘We Have Darkvision′ The Gang makes a quick stopover in Goodleaf where they meet up with one of their old friends. No, acquaintances. No... someone they've run into before. It's hard to tell if the Gang is excited about this or not. Then they head on back to Wolf Rock and hang on... is that another old friend? Woah, what is this? Reunion Central Station?

Good joke Kyle.

I hope you've brushed up on your Parseltongue because today we're talking about the Basilisk! Nah, just kidding you don't need to speak Parseltongue. That's a completely made up language that J.K Rowling barfed into existence. (That's how writers write, right? They just up-chuck words onto paper until someone begs them to stop?)

The real Basilisk is an 8 legged lizard monster that looks like it'd be right at home in one of Dr. Henry Wu's wet dreams. This bad boy eats stones and doesn't even worry about breaking it's teeth. So you know he's a real tough customer.

But will Kyle and Alex name him friend or fiend? Find out on this week's episode!

The Gang reunites with Lars and finally make it out of the Old Stonefist City Ruins. But, will they make it out of the New Stonefist City...umm... not ruins?

At some point in our lives, we've all played a version of the "If you could be a monster, what kind of monster would you be?" game. Well, this week we learn that sometimes you get to pick the monster, and sometimes the monster picks you. Today, Alex was picked by the Banshee.

While learning about the Banshee, Alex realized that she shares a disproportional number of traits with these undead, former-supermodel elf ladies. At first Kyle and Alex were shocked by the revelation, but by the end of the episode... Let's just say, you can't always judge a book by it's decaying exterior and generally poor disposition.

On this week’s episode of ‘We Have Darkvision′ The Gang pulls a Sue Storm and goes invisible. They also attempt to deal with another shimmering tear, and then try to make Julia Roberts proud when they go all 'Ocean's 11' and try to finish pulling off the heist of the century.

This week Kyle and Alex learn all about Azer: the Living Braziers. (No. Get your heads out of the gutter. You're thinking of brazzers.)  

I hope y'all like volcanoes because these dudes are bronze fire babies that come from the Elemental Plane of Fire, and volcanoes are their daddies. Well, no. Azer don't really have daddies. Well, they kind of do. Their daddies pound them (...huh. This is sounding more and more like brazzers) into shape, molded from bronze and filling them with their inner fire... look, just listen to the episode ok?

On this week’s episode of ‘We Have Darkvision′ The Gang gets rich beyond their wildest dreams. It turns out there is a lot of stuff in this vault, and some of it might even be useful. The Gang fumbled their way into the vault, and now they'll need to get out. But knowing them, it's not going to be easy.

Do you own a ranch? You do? Shit. Please tell me it's Ranch Dressing. It's not? It's a full blown ranch with real cows?  Well, I hope you have some Ankheg repellent.

Get some of that bitter apple spray and put it on your cow's ankles. Maybe that will deter these ravenous beasts from turning your livestock into a buffet. It more than likely won't deter them, but you gotta try something. Right?

This week Alex and Kyle learn all about the burrowing nuisance that is the Ankheg!