We Want The D

As you may know, dear listener, we don't do Pixar movies on the podcast. But we do talk about Disney-released spinoffs from Pixar movies. Which of course means it was only a matter of time before we got to PLANES, the Cars-adjacent franchise that mostly exists to sell toys. But you may also know that a film set in a world populated entirely by living vehicles is going to capture our hosts' imaginations in a very specific way. So strap in, D-Lovers, this one is a wild ride.

It's the last of the Disney TV shows that got their own theatrically released movies, and we saved the most grostesque for last. TEACHER'S PET features big Nathan Lane energy as a dog who desperately wants to be a boy, an insanely stacked voice cast, and just about the ugliest animation our hosts have ever seen.

It's remarkable that, after watching enough Disney movies from the 1960s, it stops mattering how unique or strange a premise is. Take MONKEYS, GO HOME! A movie that begins with Dean Jones moving to Provence, France and turns into a movie about undercutting wages for the local olive-harvesting workers and replacing them with slave labour via four chimpanzees. A bizarre premise by any definition, yet at this stage our hosts barely bat an eye.

Our hosts certainly aren't above jumping on the latest trends, so get ready to talk about Bruno, cause it's ENCANTO week. The latest Disney animated feature that is tearing up the soundtrack charts, capturing hearts and minds, and making you feel extremely sad when a house falls down. The songs will get stuck in your head, the arepas will make your stomachs rumble, and the family drama will be frustrating - but the experience will be memorable.

Y'all know that our hosts are all big fans of Jed. You know, the dog performer from classics such as The Journey of Natty Gann and White Fang? So it's sad to say that his final performance was in the...let's say lackluster Disney sequel WHITE FANG 2: MYTH OF THE WHITE WOLF. The most we can say about it is that at least it looks like a relatively easy time for ol' Jed, cause despite being the title character, the good boy ain't really even in this one all that much. And Alfred Molina aside, what they replaced him with isn't anything to write home about.

It's a rollicking river adventure this week as we watch the latest Disney movie to be based on a theme park ride, JUNGLE CRUISE. It's hard not to have at least a bit of a good time with this film, given how much it begs, borrows and steals from other beloved classics in the action-adventure genre, but it's got plenty to recommend itself on it's own! Like...Paul Giamatti and Jesse Plemons doing broad accents, Jack Whitehall playing his own father, and...um...The Rock wearing a cute lil' hat?

How do you solve the problem of wanting to make an origin story for a villain whose only trait is a homicidal urge to murder animals and wear their skins? Well, if you're Disney, it's rather simple: cast Emma Stone, give her a tragic backstory, and then (and here's the important part) completely abandon any intention of having her turn into a puppy-strangling maniac. This CRUELLA may not be destined to become the iconic villain from the original animated classic, but there's still plenty to unpack in this movie.

Bob and Margaret is an adult animated television series created by David Fine and Alison Snowden. The show revolved around a married English couple named Bob and Margaret Fish, a middle class 40-ish working couple with no children and two dogs. Bob is a dentist and Margaret is a chiropodist. Bob and Margaret struggle with everyday issues and mid-life crises. Stories often revolve around the mundane, but in a way which is eminently relatable. From the trials of shopping to dealing with friends who annoy them, but owe them a dinner. Anyway, here's our episode on Disney's SNOW DOGS.

In the pantheon of Disney Channel Original Movie icons, Galleria, Chanel, Aqua and Do may just be their own Mount Rushmore. And it's easy to see why; THE CHEETAH GIRLS is an earnest story of friendship, self-acceptance and conflict resolution that stands up with even the best episodes of Degrassi: The Next Generation. It also has some wild examples of teen slang, awful early 2000s fashion and we're not entirely convinced Raven-Symoné didn't throw a bichon frise down a sinkhole for attention.

When you think about it, Disney has a pretty decent track record with adventure movies. So THE ISLAND AT THE TOP OF THE WORLD could have been a welcome reprieve from the usual 70s fare of films about dogs and old people. Could have been, but wasn't. Instead, it's a surprisingly dull affair, thanks to an uninteresting plot, and even more uninteresting characters.