Episode 5: What I Wish I Could Say – To Myself, and Those I’ve Hurt

In this deeply personal episode, I open up about my past struggles with anger, insecurity, and self-worth. I reflect on my journey—from childhood pain to personal growth—and share the things I wish I could say to the people I’ve hurt… and to myself. If you’ve ever wrestled with guilt, self-forgiveness, or the desire to grow into something better, this episode is for you. It’s honest, emotional, and rooted in hope.

In this deeply personal episode, I open my heart to my son, Jayden — who we lost at 15 weeks due to miscarriage in 2021. Though we never got to hold him in life, his presence has left a permanent mark on ours. I speak to the moments he never got to live: his first steps, birthdays, laughter, and the life I wish he could have had. My daughter shares her hopes and heartache for the little brother she never got to meet, and my wife speaks from the raw, sacred place of a mother who carried her child and had to say goodbye far too soon. This episode is for every parent who’s experienced the silent grief of pregnancy loss — a reminder that their love, their child, and their story matter.

In this heartfelt and deeply personal episode, I open up about my cousin and best friend, John Harvey—a man who was larger than life, endlessly hilarious, and full of heart. We shared a bond like brothers, filled with laughter, midnight movie premieres, and unforgettable memories. I talk about the joy he brought to those around him, the pain of losing him so suddenly, and the things I wish I could have said before he was gone. This episode is for anyone who’s ever lost someone they loved, and especially for those still grieving in silence.

In this episode, I reflect on the life and love of my mom—who she was, what she gave, and how her pain changed our conversations in the last years of her life. I share memories of her kindness, the deep compassion she showed to those around her, and the heartbreak of watching someone you love suffer. This is an honest, personal conversation about grief, presence, and the words I never got to say. If you’ve ever felt the ache of unfinished moments or missed goodbyes, I hope this brings comfort and connection.

In this first episode, I open up about something deeply personal—the things I never got to say to my dad before he passed.

He was one of the best men I’ve ever known. Funny, warm, able to talk to anyone. But like many of us, he struggled—especially in his later years. He pulled away slowly, believing he was running out of time, even though he still had so much left to give.

This episode is part reflection, part conversation, and part goodbye. It’s for anyone who’s lost someone they love and still carries words they wish they could’ve said.

If you’re grieving too, or if there’s something unspoken in your heart, I hope this helps you feel less alone.