What the HELL Were You Thinking?

SHOW NOTES EPISODE 142: “Would I Lie To You Year In Review”

It’s New Year’s Eve and Host Dave Bledsoe has already started drinking, though it’s after 11 AM on a Sunday so it’s unusual. On this special Year In Review Show, we count down the 12 Big Lies of 2017 (It was a HARD selection process.)

Along the way, we riff on Casey Kasem, and provide some parenting tips from the 70’s (Do NOT use these today!) We talk Large Adult Sons and why Barack Obama ain’t got time for your shit. (He’s retired, leave the man alone.) FINALLY we unveil some long overdue updates to the show! (Sadly, same old Host). We think you will like them. (As much as you like ANYTHING on this show.)

Our Sponsor this week is Duplicity, when you need to lie but can’t be caught lying, try Duplicity. We open the show with Jean Luc MacBeth and close with The Full Moon Band asking if they would lie you? (The seem honest to us.) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urn_UTmffO8

Show Music:David Hyde Music https://soundcloud.com/davidhydemusic/piano-rock-instrumental

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed:

January 2017:

Crowd Size https://www.factcheck.org/2017/01/the-facts-on-crowd-size/

February

Flynn I barely knew the guy https://www.factcheck.org/2017/02/trump-spins-flynn-facts/

March

Wire tapps https://www.factcheck.org/2017/03/examining-trumps-wiretap-claim/

April

Hitler never used gas https://www.factcheck.org/2017/04/hitler-chemical-weapons/

May

Comey firing lies https://www.factcheck.org/2017/05/trump-fire-comey/

June

He doth protest too much https://www.factcheck.org/2017/06/explaining-trumps-russia-tweets/

July

Don Jr lies https://www.factcheck.org/2017/07/trumps-misleading-defense-son/

August

Many sides https://www.factcheck.org/2017/08/trumps-phoenix-fiction/

September

Proof? https://www.factcheck.org/2017/09/kobachs-bogus-proof-voter-fraud/

October

Clinton Uranium https://www.factcheck.org/2017/10/facts-uranium-one/

November

Missed this one! https://www.factcheck.org/2017/11/trumps-bizarre-plane-story/

December

All the FBI Lies https://www.factcheck.org/2017/12/factchecking-trumps-criticism-fbi/

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Show Notes Episode 93 “No Hope But Mount Hope” Redux

Hello and welcome to the podcast that asks a simple question, when you just wrote a new intro to a rerun episode and hoped nobody would notice what the HELL were you thinking? I am your Host Dave Bledsoe and this is a Friday December 30th 2017 “No Hope But Mount Hope” redux edition of the show where we are taking the week off and rerunning the most downloaded episode of the show. Stay tuned.

Hi podfriends, hope you had a very Murray Christmas (Murray) I saw Murray Christmas because until Trump leaves office I REFUSE to say Merry Christmas on principle and I kinda LOVE the name Murray. (Tuesdays With Murray) Since Gavin is back in the UK visiting his family...you all knew Gavin in English right? He used to work for the BBC before he was shitcanned for saying mean things about Prince Harry, tragic really. Our redux this week is Episode 93, originally aired January 20th of this year, and it is predicting that things might not be THAT bad under President Trump. I am happy to report many of the things I was afraid when I recorded this episode did NOT come to pass, I am sad to report the things that DID happen are in some ways worse. But, at LEAST I am not recording a show from a concentration camp in North Dakota. (next year).

As I noted, THIS episode is the most downloaded of all my podcasts and for the life of me I could not understand why. I mean, did people suddenly need me to reassure them that life would continue even IF Trump was President, were the really into the idea of Zed’s Apocalypse Vault? (unlikely) Nope, come to find out, the Canadian Fractal Pattern released an album in 2004 of the same name, likely inspired by the same quote from Stephen King’s The Stand that I took the show title from. You know what sucks the most for the band, this podcast episode has a higher Google rank than the actual album. You bust your ass to make music and some drunk asshole with a podcast beats you out on Google and steals your clicks. That is Trump’s America in a nutshell. So, without further ado, Happy New Year, see you in 2018 (morning) and enjoy this “Best Of” edition of the show.

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

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Episode 141:  “Tuesdays With Morley”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe opens his Christmas Stocking to find a carton of Morley’s and a bottle of generic whiskey.  Just what he asked for.   (We cannot WAIT!)

Along the way we discuss the Deep State and the mystery surrounding the shadowy cabal of middle managers and career bureaucrats that REALLY run the government.  (Bill Lumbergh is the Master of Us All).  We are also DEEPLY shocked that Senators might create a black money Pentagon department that funnels money to a personal friend and campaign donor and tell no one about doing so!  (Shocked!)  There is even some math this week where we attempt to determine how fast going a mile second REALLY is, only find that while it’s impressive it’s actually not remotely out of the realm of what technology allows.  (Dude, seriously, it’s only 3,600 MPH, rockets do seven times that going into orbit!) Also, Blink 182?  Seriously?

In the Wayback, we head to September 18th, 1947 and the formation of the Deep State! Our Sponsor this week is Morley Cigarettes, in a movie, have a Morley!  We open the show the Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man and close with what we want for Christmas this year!

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

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Citations Needed:

Harry Reid Saves the Universe

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/12/16/us/politics/pentagon-program-ufo-harry-reid.html

This TOTALLY Happened!

https://www.inquisitr.com/2939994/grey-aliens-signed-treaty-with-eisenhower-in-1954-after-u-s-government-rejected-overtures-from-nordic-or-pleiadian-aliens/

The only REALLY freaky part of this story.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/12/16/us/politics/unidentified-flying-object-navy.html

President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho

https://www.thedailybeast.com/luis-elizondo-former-director-of-the-pentagons-aerospace-id-program-says-some-ufos-still-defy-explanation

If you can’t trust the guy from Blink 182 who CAN you trust?

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/tom-delonge-hints-pentagon-ufo-disclosure-beginning-article-1.3705817

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Episode 140: “One Moore For the Road”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe is visited by three ghosts, only to find they are not ghosts but some dudes he owes money, and they hurt him really bad. On the show this week we talk about the Fall of Roy Moore and what that means for the future. (Hint: Actually, it’s really good for a change!)

Along the way we ponder how to thank the Black Voters, particularly the Black Women of Alabama for saving our asses. (Flowers are nice!) We examine WHY Roy Moore really lost (It wasn’t media, it was the pedophilia.) and say really nice things about Doug Jones. (He taught us how to do the Dougie!)

Our Sponsors this week are The Black Voters, who want to say you’re welcome but seriously, do something for us Democrats. We open the show with Roy preaching and close YouTube’s Steve Knechtges who is taking our drink orders. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlh8z8HlLNs

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

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Citations Needed:

Even Huckabee?

https://twitter.com/GovMikeHuckabee/status/940918705105534976

The End of the Beginning AND the Beginning of the End

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/12/alabama-and-2018/548327/

We just got our asses kicked pal

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2010/nov/03/barack-obama-midterms-better-job

When will they ever learn? (Never)

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2017/12/the_roy_moore_debacle_should_shock_the_gop_into_changing_its_ways.html

Let’s Hear for the Whiz Kid

https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/special-elections-so-far-point-to-a-democratic-wave-in-2018/

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EPISODE 139: “Meandering Toward Mediocrity”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe realizes he was born mediocre, then achieved mediocrity and had more mediocrity thrust upon him. On the show this week we ask if a little mediocrity is such a bad thing. (It’s certainly common enough.)

Along the way we learn that Dave is not a disappointment to his parents. (They knew where he would wind up all along.) We assess the potential of most Americans and find the overwhelming majority of them not special. We spend a lot of time explaining why America the country is only So-So as far as nations go, and why we can never hold a candle to our colonial mother country. (I mean we can’t even occupy India!) We also clearly lay out how, culturally speaking, we will always operate at a deficit. (We are looking at Kardashians!)

In our Wayback this week, we explain why it is a VERY bad idea for nation-states to believe they are better than other nations--and you KNOW who we are talking about! Our Sponsor this week is Average Joes, there are better companies out there, but there are worse. We open the show with just an average working man and close with Ordinary Boys performed by YouTuber Pete Burnett (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eW0dLR6je00 )

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

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Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed:

Some Average Dude: https://markmanson.net/being-average

Where the Problem Started: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unification_of_Germany

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SHOW NOTES EPISODE 138: “Now You’re Just A Nazi That I Used to Know”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe finds out he was almost Time’s Man of the Year but thought it would probably be a bad idea. On the show this week we talk about That Article in the Times were they made being a Nazi kind of like being a Rotarian. (Not that we are sure what Rotarians actually are.)

Along the way we discuss the abomination of midichlorians, and the delusions of well meaning East Coast Liberals. (This is the future Liberals want.) We dive into what a Nazi sings at karaoke and why you should never go sing karaoke with a White Nationalist. (Way too much Lee Greenwood). There is also a pitch for reboot of “Guess Who's Coming to Dinner” with a 2017 twist! (Call us Netflix!) We also CLEARLY explain the difference between modern American Nazis and your classic Black and White Nazis. (Germany never had an X-Box.)

Our sponsor this week is Airy Ann’s Air Purification, cleansing the stain of pollution in your home. We skip the Wayback this week because SOMETIMES, this shit has no historical parallels. We open the show with Illinois Nazi’s and close with Walk of the Earth. .https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_g9bBO1lfu8

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

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Citations Needed:

He SOUNDS like a swell guy!

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/25/us/ohio-hovater-white-nationalist.html

Because YOU ARE!

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/26/reader-center/readers-accuse-us-of-normalizing-a-nazi-sympathizer-we-respond.html

World’s Smallest Violin

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/29/us/nazi-sympathizer-profiled-by-the-times-loses-his-job.html

No, Seriously, it’s Goy Fund Me!

https://thinkprogress.org/nazis-are-raising-funds-401a474ab37b/

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SHOW NOTES SPECIAL EDITION NINE; “Violations of the Neutral Zone”

In this Special Edition of the Show Host Dave Bledsoe takes a break from his religious observances to get bitter about what might of have been. (Another failed DJ with a podcast!) On the show we talk Net Neutrality and why you should actually give a shit. (Hint: They are coming for your porn!)

Along the way we defend our stand on Ajit Pai being a member of the Tal Shiar and remind you even people who aren’t White can been shitty too. We do a quick mini-Wayback to 1996 and the death of all that was good and decent on the airwaves. (We miss you Justin and Whitey! #RiseGuysForever) Finally we explain what YOU need to do save your porn, or anything else you value on the Internet. Get over to www.battleforthenet.com and DO SOMETHING!

Our Sponsor is Fast Eddies Internet, the Internet just like you remember it: sloooooowwwww. We open the show with Captain Picard and close with YouTuber Gary Schutt https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pySrsDSUJw4

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

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SHOW NOTES EPISODE 137: “Call Me, Al”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe remembers every awful thing he ever said to women and comes the realization his political career is probably over. (For SO many reasons.) On the show this week look at people whose political career is probably over and why they should just get the fuck out. (Aside from human decency, which they don’t have.)

Along the way we examine ways you can get your ass kicked in a German nightclub. (Hint: Be Dave) and exciting methods for ruining the lives of your subordinates. (Sue Gavin, SUE!) We talk all the Congress Critters who never seem to face the music and wonder why. (Hint: Men control everything.) We also remind everyone the “Dirty Old Man” thing only works if you are literally months away from death.

Our Wayback stops 1974 and a colorful Congressman’s girlfriend. Our Sponsor is Bum Guard, covering your ass from groping men. We open our show with him, Al Franken and close with YouTube’s Doug Edgell Band being our bodyguard and long lost pal. https://youtu.be/VvSmpS1I_S0

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed:

Seriously, Al?

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/al-franken-two-more-women-groping_us_5a15a455e4b09650540ec295

Does This Surprise ANYONE?

https://www.buzzfeed.com/paulmcleod/she-complained-that-a-powerful-congressman-harassed-her?utm_term=.gxr5pjRzvE#.qy7akjmo5V

Don’t let the door yah where the good lord split yah

http://www.freep.com/story/opinion/editorials/2017/11/21/editorial-u-s-rep-john-conyers-must-resign/885207001/

A History of Perviness

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/congress-sexual-misconduct_us_5a10591de4b0dd63b1aac3b4

Roy Moore Would Fit Right In

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1983_congressional_page_sex_scandal

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SHOW NOTES EPISODE 136: “With a Rebel Yell, They Cried Moore, Moore, Moore”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe cracks open his High School Yearbook only discover wow, people REALLY didn’t like him! On the show this week we discover we REALLY don’t like Alabama Republicans! (Alabama Democrats and Independents are cool, except you could ease up on the football.)

We then put on our hip waders and slog into the shitshow that is the life and political career of Roy Moore, alleged child molester and admitted asshole. (He really doesn’t hide it.) Along the way learn more about life in the rural South than we ever wanted to know, and some of us lived there. We also discover why a thirty-something man might want date a High School girl. (Hint: It’s in a Biblical Sense.) We also discover Alabama is rife with shitty politicians, possibly because Alabama is rife with shitty people. (Garbage in, garbage out.)

In our Wayback this Week, we head back to 1987 around the time when Roy gave up High School girls for college girls (He kept getting older they stayed the same age.) to learn why Evangelicals are sticking with their boy Roy. Our sponsor is Cletus J. Bibb III Esquire, who wants you to know ain’t crime to big or disgusting for Cletus to fix. We open our show this week with Dennis Miller’s Southern Tour and close with Youtuber Erik Faber rebelling and yelling. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwSzIIa5Tus

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed:

A History of Assholes

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H._Guy_Hunt

Not Only an Asshole, Also a Hypocrite

https://www.npr.org/2017/09/27/553856901/roy-moore-s-long-controversial-history-in-alabama-politics

But THESE Fuckers

https://www.thestar.com/news/world/2017/11/09/alabama-republicans-defend-roy-moore-over-allegations-he-had-sexual-contact-with-14-year-old.html

Best Twitter

https://twitter.com/aedwardslevy/status/930567439091453954

It’s Is STILL Fucking Sick

https://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Society/2017/1115/Behind-religious-defense-of-Roy-Moore-an-aggressive-view-of-masculinity

Son of Sam Ministries

http://www.roxanneministries.org/

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SHOW NOTES EPISODE 135: “The Hero Dies In This One”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe wants to remind you no one wants to see your dick. No one. On the show this week we talk about all the people who did not want to see Louis CK’s dick but had to see it anyway.

Along the way we learn why Dave’s Mom still thinks he is gay. (Straight people love Charles Nelson Reilly too!) We also learn that Bones McCoy was the sexiest person on Star Trek, hands down. (Damnit Dave, he’s a doctor, not a fashion model.) We finally understand why Dave does a podcast instead of stand up and that Bob Newhart’s comedy stands up to the test of time better than any other comedian we can think of. (Picking up that imaginary phone kills us EVERY TIME!)

On a more serious note, we observe that even if you are a fundamentally broken and depressed person, you really do NOT need to sexually harass people. (Honestly, you are rich and famous enough that SOME people would willingly watch you jerk off!) We talk about why men are such shits and our Wayback takes to October of 1991 where we learned that pubic hairs on Coke cans might be objectively funny to a 21 year old, they are NOT appropriate in the workplace. Ever.

Our Sponsor this week is Dick Peeper, if you NEED to show someone your dick, show it to us! Everyone will be happy you did. We open our show Louis CK trying to warn us and close with the Ataris.

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud

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Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed:

Oh Louis: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/09/arts/television/louis-ck-sexual-misconduct.html?mtrref=undefined&gwh=7B5AE3E722BEE447744B1C0500EF78D1&gwt=pay

Gawker Was Good Webiste 1:

http://gawker.com/5894527/which-beloved-comedian-likes-to-force-female-comics-to-watch-him-jerk-off

And 2: http://defamer.gawker.com/louis-c-k-will-call-you-up-to-talk-about-his-alleged-s-1687820755

The Legacy of Anita Hill

https://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,976770,00.html

Anita Today: http://variety.com/2017/biz/news/anita-hill-sexual-harassment-harvey-weinstein-guest-column-1202585236/

Watch His Eyes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZURHD5BU1o8

It Easy Being White

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3yn7m/working-women-and-the-sexual-harassment-we-dont-hear-about

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