When we get married, we have dreams, hopes and goals for what our lifelong union with our new partner will look like. But that idealistic view doesn’t always match reality. Instead, we may find ourselves wondering why our man is so different compared to how he used to be at the beginning of the relationship or to the doting husbands we see on social media. Maybe we find ourselves in constant conflict with him, never finding common ground. Both of these issues can slowly and painfully drive your marriage into the ground.

Comparison and conflict are major, yet common, issues in marriage. Our very own co-host, Julie Bender, experienced them in her relationships. In this podcast episode—and in her book, soon to be releases as part of our “Smart Living in Small Bites” book series—Julie walks through her difficult upbringing, her first marriage to Paul and the challenges they faced during their 11 years together, his unexpected passing and her experience dating and marrying her current husband, Donny.

Julie shares what to do when marriage is hard, revealing the comparison traps and the signs that indicate serious, underlying issues with communication and honesty and offers practical, fresh ways to resolve them. You and your spouse need to set your pride aside and be ready to work hard to protect and save your marriage. It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.

“There’s no effort that you put into your marriage that isn’t going to bear fruit.” —Julie Bender

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