When We Die Talks

This week’s anonymous call begins with jokes about humidity, pets, and even what it would mean to be reincarnated as a cactus. But, like so many of these conversations, the laughter eventually gives way to something much more personal.

The caller opens up about years of chronic illness, nearly dying from blood clots, and the disappointment of seeking comfort in a faith community that couldn’t support them. They share what it meant to step away from the church, to embrace their identity, and to find peace in the cycles of nature.

What emerges is a vision of death not as an ending, but as energy recycled. Through plants, through animals, through us. It’s a conversation that mixes humor, honesty, and a surprisingly beautiful take on what might come next.

If you’d like to watch this conversation instead of just listening, you can find the video version on YouTube.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendations: The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Giver by Lois Lowry
• The near-death experience of blood clots and how it changed their outlook on mortality
• Why humor became their way of coping with chronic pain and medical trauma
• Leaving the church, and what it means to find comfort outside of faith
• Seeing dogs and cats as “souls who’ve already learned the lessons”
• The idea of being reincarnated as a cactus (and what plants can teach us about energy, growth, and symbiosis)
• How conversations about death can swing from lighthearted to deeply personal in a matter of minutes

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

NOTE: If you would like to watch this episode, you can find the video version here. It is just the conversation and nothing else.

This week’s anonymous call is with someone who’s actually a close friend of mine. We recorded together once before, but that was right when I decided to shift the podcast into anonymous calls. Because of that, the episode never aired. She was kind enough to come back and do it again, making this the first anonymous call where I know who I’m talking to.

From the start, our conversation swings between the personal and the cosmic. We talk about her grandmother’s heart-shaped signs, her fears about eternity, and the way infinity, time, and nothingness can make your head spin. Along the way we touch on space, science, and spirituality.

It’s an episode that balances humor, honesty, and a genuine curiosity about what lies beyond the life we know.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendations: The Tools and Coming Alive by Phil Stutz & Barry Michaels, Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss
• The “Pillars of Creation” and what the scale of the universe does to our sense of time
• Why the idea of eternity can feel just as terrifying as it is comforting
• Heart-shaped signs from her grandmother and how they continue to show up years later
• Don’s book recommended to me: Jesus and Buddha: The Parallel Sayings
• How conversations about death pull us between the intimate and the infinite
• Why dogs might be the cruelest reminder of mortality
• A spoiler for the 1997 movie Contact (you’ve had almost 30 years to not have it ruined)

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

This week’s anonymous call begins with an unexpected laugh, “Don’t misgender God!”  But from there, we turn towards the questions and stories that formed my guest’s beliefs.

She talks about witnessing her father’s peaceful passing, the strange signs that followed, and how those experiences restored her faith that something waits for us after death. We also dig into grief, how it lingers like a sudden pothole in the middle of an otherwise good day, and why she sees every person as an irreplaceable puzzle piece.

The conversation stretches from religion to consciousness, from science to synchronicity, all woven together with honesty and humor.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendation: The Diary of Anne Frank by Anne Frank
• Grief as a state of being, not just an emotion
• Why death is like losing a puzzle piece that can never be duplicated
• Stories of signs and synchronicities after loss
• How her father’s passing restored her faith in an afterlife
• Ego, consciousness, and what might dissolve when we die
• The strange and beautiful ways nature reminds us of connection

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

This week’s anonymous call takes us in a direction I didn’t quite expect. My guest starts by admitting she isn’t sure she’ll ever die. Maybe she’s immortal. Maybe she’s destined to become a vampire. From there, the conversation winds through questions of heaven, purgatory, and what it might mean if there really were no end.

It’s a mix of humor and honesty: she jokes about sexy vampires, “jammy jams,” and how every day feels like a slumber party. But, she also reflects on loneliness, the heartbreak of living forever, and what it means to “walk people home.” Along the way, she shares her thoughts on independence, the importance of focusing on life’s quality as much as its quantity, and how she’s learned to laugh at embarrassment.

It’s a strange conversation in the best ways. Funny, offbeat, and surprisingly wise.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendation: The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
• Movie references: The Man from Earth and The Age of Adaline
• “Walking each other home” and the wisdom of Ram Dass
• Thoughts on heaven, hell, and purgatory
• Ghosts, signs, and the possibility of living forever
• Embracing independence and finding joy in solitude
• Letting go of embarrassment and owning our inner dork
• Mexican Day of the Dead traditions and marigolds
• Remembering loved ones with some popcorn and champagne

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

In this anonymous call, our caller shares the story of losing her brother and what it meant to walk alongside him as both a sister and a death doula. From the surreal moments of him “dying three times” before it stuck, to jokes over morphine doses and freezer chicken, to the signs he promised would show up after he was gone, the conversation blends heartbreak with humor in ways only death seems to invite.

She reflects on the importance of planning for death, the wisdom carried through ancestry, and the strange intimacy that comes with caring for someone at the end of life. And through it all, there’s laughter, ritual, and the reminder that even in grief, life keeps insisting on showing up.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendations: Collected Poems by Charles Bukowski and The Poetry of Mary Oliver
• Growing up without space for grief and finding her way into death work
• Caring for her brother as he went through the dying process
• The surreal experience of “dying three times” before his final death
• Morphine jokes, banquet chicken, and finding levity in loss
• Why she believes energy continues beyond the body
• The importance of advanced care planning and making your wishes known
• Rituals, ancestry, and how our loved ones live on through us

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

In this anonymous call, our caller lost his wife in a sudden car accident. Just before they even made the first mortgage payment on their home. The timing was cruel, especially after years of saving and sacrificing for the life they planned to start “someday.”

He describes himself as an optimistic nihilist. Someone who believes there’s nothing after death, and finds that reality liberating. For him, knowing this is the one shot we get makes every choice matter more. We talk about the tension between planning for the future and living for today, how grief reshapes your relationship with time, and the loneliness of carrying loss when the world has already moved on.

And between the moments of pain, there are flashes of wit and unexpected laughter. A reminder that even in loss, life still shows up.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Book recommendation: The Gunslinger by Stephen King
• Losing his wife in a sudden car accident and the plans they never got to live out
• Why he sees death as freeing through the lens of optimistic nihilism
• The danger of saving everything for “someday”
• Dark humor as a coping mechanism for grief
• How modern death practices have become impersonal—and why that matters
• The difference between offering someone a “blanket” or an “axe” in grief support
• Why he believes funerary rituals are for the living, not the dead

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

In this episode, we talk about the energy that connects us, the experiences that crack us open, and the quiet ways we start to make sense of death. The caller, a nurse and Reiki practitioner, shares how being in the room with people as they passed began to reshape everything she thought she knew.

We talk about mystical experiences, dreams that feel like visitations, and why she believes consciousness doesn’t end when the body does. From a childhood fascination with mummies to a meditation where she briefly became a tree, this is a conversation about presence, transition, and the strange beauty of being alive.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Favorite Books: The Diary of Anne Frank, The Bell Jar, and a childhood book on Egyptian Mummies
• Early encounters with death and a fascination that never left
• Working as an ER nurse and the moment a patient came to her in a dream
• Learning about psychopomps and guiding souls between worlds
• Practicing Reiki and connecting with her grandmother’s energy before she passed
• What it means to be part of a vast, infinite web, and how that might shape what comes next

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

Content Note: This episode includes discussion of suicide and mental health struggles. If you or someone you know is struggling, you can call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988. Free, confidential support is available 24/7.

----------

In this episode, we talk about grief that lingers, the stigma around mental illness, and why comparing depression to weakness misses the point. The caller shares what it was like to lose someone she loved to suicide, how that experience shaped her beliefs about death, and how, through dreams, he never fully left.

We also talk about growing up in a religiously divided household, her belief in energy that never ends, and why she still feels surrounded by the people she’s lost. Don't worry there’s humor in this one too. Including a dog-run nightclub with David Bowie and Freddie Mercury. And a quiet but fierce commitment to speaking honestly about the things we’re taught to avoid.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Favorite Book: Chasing the Scream by Johann Hari
• Movies Mentioned: What Dreams May Come & The Ripple Effect
• Losing a friend to suicide at 22
• Growing up with both Jehovah’s Witness and Catholic influence
• Energy, memory, and what it means when the dead appear in dreams
• A dog with attitude and a nightclub in the afterlife
• Why mental illness isn’t weakness
• Holding space for the grief we don’t know how to talk about

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

This anonymous caller doesn’t claim to know what happens when we die and he’s completely at peace with that.

In this episode, we talk about what it means to live without answers but still find meaning. From a childhood shaped by death anxiety to a life enriched by spiritual study, psychedelics, and profound loss, he shares how grief transformed his relationship with death. And how, despite not having a clear belief about what comes next, one message remains constant: Everything Will Be O.K.

We also talk about growing up Mormon, the importance of animals, and the moment a mysterious song blaring from a stereo felt like a message from the other side. Whether you believe in the stars, the soul, or nothing at all, this conversation is a reminder that peace can still exist in uncertainty.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Favorite Book: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
• Growing up with fear of death and learning to let it go
• Losing a beloved cat, dog, and parent
• Burning Man, acid trips, and a connected universe
• A mysterious stereo moment that felt like a message from his mom
• What it means to love an animal who’s known lack

Everything Will Be Ok Photo: Click Here

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.

Season 2 officially starts next week, but I wanted to take a minute to share a few thoughts before it does. In this short update, I talk about how the podcast has evolved, what’s shifting in Season 2, and what you can still expect from each episode moving forward.

If you’ve been listening, thank you for being here. And if you’re just joining, I’m glad you found the show.

About When We Die Talks: When We Die Talks is a podcast built around anonymous conversations about death, loss, and how contemplating mortality shapes the way we live. If you’re new here, start with the Episode Guide. It’s designed to help you find conversations that match where you’re at—curiosity, grief, hesitation, or openness.

Stay Connected
🌐 Website: whenwedietalks.com
📰 Substack: When We Die Talks
📸 Instagram: @whenwedietalks
▶️ YouTube: When We Die Talks
✉️ Email: [email protected]

Want to share your thoughts? Leave a voicemail at 971-328-0864 and share what you believe happens when we die. Messages may be featured in a future episode. If you’d like to have a full conversation, you can apply to be an anonymous caller at whenwedietalks.com.