When We Speak

Today's guest is Melissa Guttman. We met via Instagram and bonded over Internal Family System (IFS). We discuss how she found her voice and helps others to do the same, her work with creatives, performers, and singers, how we validate our own voice, and how music evokes memory.

Melissa Guttman is a music therapist and IFS trained psychotherapist, with degrees from Berklee College of Music and New York University. Her purpose is helping creatives with perfectionism and performance anxiety to find their voice. She sees clients based in NYC. Her favorite past times are singing, swimming, dancing, and nature hikes.

Follow Melissa on IG 

In today's interview I speak with Aundi Kolber about her books Try Softer and newly released, The Try Softer Guided Journey. Aundi and I discuss some of the most painful seasons of her life, the healing journey, what it means to be an authentic therapist, how we show empathy and compassion in our work, honoring your pain, and building a relationship with your younger self.

Aundi Kolber is a licensed professional counselor (MA, LPC), an author, and a speaker living in Castle Rock, Colorado. She has received additional training in her specialization of trauma- and body-centered therapies and is passionate about the integration of faith and psychology. She has written for Relevant, CT Women, and (in)courage. As a survivor of trauma, Aundi brings hard-won knowledge about the work of change, the power of redemption, and the beauty of experiencing God with us in our pain. Aundi is happily married to her best friend, Brendan, and is the proud mom of Matia and Jude.

Connect with Aundi on I

Purchase Aundi's books here: https://www.amazon.com/Aundi-Kolber/e/B07VFVBYHH?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_2&qid=1636371153&sr=1-2

In today's episode and am speaking with my one of the funniest, and most intelligent Black women in my community, Joquina Reed. We discuss:

Institutional racism

Joquina's superpower and kryptonite

The Triad (white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism)

How whiteness and white supremacy harms

Race being a social construct

The importance of intellectual humility

Divesting from Whiteness

My name is Joquina Reed. But you all most definitely can call me Kina. By far one of the most important hats, I wear in life is being a fabulous aunt to 8 nieces and nephews! In addition to being Nanny Kina, I am also a DEI consultant and facilitator, researcher, learning strategist, and community advocate. Every day I wake up committed to moving us all closer to the goal line of shared humanity. I often find my words feel limited by not speaking my fore-parents tongue, but I still speak. I enjoy sticking my hand in soil to remind myself the universe is both bigger than I am and still enlarged by my acts. I’m constantly looking for opportunities to help others enlarge themselves and step out of the boxes they no longer fit. As a life-long learner and educator, I affirm the words of my great ancestor, Anna Julia Cooper, “The cause of freedom is not the cause of a race or a sect, a party or a class - it is the cause of humankind, the very birthright of humanity.”

Follow Joquina on IG here at The Anti Blackness Reader 

Follow Joquina's on IG here @ Divesting from Whiteness 

Listen to Joquina's podcast Divesting From Whiteness

In today's episode I am speaking with my guest, Amber Webb Sims. This is one of the most powerful episodes I've recorded. Amber and I discuss her career as an attorney and how she uses her voice to demystify information. Amber shares what it means to divest from white supremacy, how racial capitalism affects Black people, Black pain being profitable, and Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) being trendy. Amber also shares: 

--why we must speak about pay inequity in the workplace

--why labor is not aspirational

--silence being a tool for white supremacy.

Amber is an attorney, speaker, writer, abolitionist. These are just a few words that describe Amber Webb Sims. Asa trial lawyer with nearly 100 first chair jury trials, Amber is among the top attorneys in Texas as measured by actual cases tried. But her gift and passion are empowering people through making complicated, intimidating information understandable, engaging, practical, and fun. This passion has extended beyond the courtroom to topics such as theology, politics, and social justice. After graduating from The Hockaday School in 2003, Amber got a B.A. in Political Science from The George Washington University. Afterwards, she obtained her Doctor of Jurisprudence, cum laude, from Texas Tech University School of Law. She worked briefly as an Assistant District Attorney in Dallas County during the tenure of Craig Watkins, the first African-American elected District Attorney in the State of Texas. Her primary field of practice is insurance defenselitigation, and Amber has worked in a top insurance defense law firm as well as for three of the largest carriers in the country.

Amber currently works as Assistant Vice President, Senior Legal Counsel in Litigation for AT&T, and her responsibilities include handling personal injury, premises liability, catastrophic loss, wrongful death, and commercial dispute cases in the six states that make up old Southwestern Bell. In her spare time, Amber co-hosts the Broke-ish podcast with Erika Brown, and they discuss the systemic and interpersonal impacts of racism and injustice on the Black community. She also regularly appears on radio shows, virtual events, andchurches – discussing a wide range of issues. She lives in Prosper, Texas with her husband, kids, and crazy dog. 

Today's episode is all about honoring Oprah Winfrey. I am joined by my friends Andrea Kingsley-Miller, Cha Sears-Barefield, Marcie Alvis-Walker, and Monica DiCristina.

I wanted a fun episode with some of my closest sisters and what better way to spend time with them than on a podcast talking about someone we all admire and have looked up to since childhood. We each share our earliest memories, what we've learned from Oprah, our own AHA moments, and what we would say to Oprah if ever given the chance. We love you Oprah and hope you know what a profound impact you've had on us and millions all over the world.

Andrea Miller is a Jesus follower and justice seeker on a journey of discovering what it actually means to pursue both. She’s a fellow sojourner and wilderness wanderer exploring life at the intersection of evolving faith and being fully who God created her to be while making space for others to do the same. With a degree in Communication/PR, she’s worked in church ministry and in the non- profit arena but currently is a full- time mom raising two daughters- Grace (18) and Mary (12). Andrea is also the host of the HerStory Speaks Podcast which she created as a platform for brave women to share their stories over vulnerable conversations. Andrea believes nothing has the power to both break and heal like our stories. The power of collective story telling is central to her passion for lifting up the voices of women on the margins. After living in the Bible Belt for the last 6yrs, Andrea now resides with her family in the Kansas City area. As a recovering people pleaser and enneagram 5, you can usually find her outside connecting with nature or settled on her porch with a good book.

Find her at herstoryspeakspodcast.com and Instagram @herstoryspeakspodcast

Cha Barefield is a powerful speaker, entrepreneur and talk show host of The Cha Show. The Cha Show is committed to curating meaningful conversations that bring people together. It creates a safe space for people to share their stories. The Cha Show inspires our hearts to be better, love better and hope more. Cha believes in the power of pushing the needle towards love. She sees the extraordinary in the ordinary and causes us to see the same. The world needs what Cha seeks to amplify, now more than ever.

Marcie Alvis-Walker is a writer and the creator of the blog and Instagram feed, Black Coffee with White Friends and Mockingbird History Lessons.

She is passionate about what it means to embrace intersectionality, diversity and inclusion in our daily lives. As a history enthusiast, she believes that learning our comprehensive history from diverse narratives is not only racially healing but also radically anti- racist.  She recently moved to Chicago, Illinois with her husband, daughter, and their dog Evie where she reads a lot of books, watches a lot of movies, and drinks a lot of tea and coffee. Follow her story at: http://www.blackcoffeewithwhitefriends.com/Sign-up for Mockingbird History Lessons by becoming part of her Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/mockingbirdhistorylessonsforadults

Stay in community with her daily on Instagram:

@blackcoffeewithwhitefriends

@mockingbirdhistorylessons ”

Monica DiCristina is a Licensed Professional Counselor with more than a decade of experience in individuals and couples therapy. She walks with people as they process difficult experiences, helping to bring healing to their relationship with themselves and others. Through her podcast, writing, speaking, and counseling work, Monica carries out her heartfelt mission to guide and collaborate with others in their process of becoming who they were made to be.

Website: monicadicristina.com

Instagram: @monicadicristina

Podcast: Still Becoming Kids

Today's episode was inspired by Black Women Woes Part I but with a new group of beautiful, inspiring, powerful, and passionate women. This discussion felt like love,  family, strength personified, and spiritual. We laughed, held space for each other, snapped fingers, and said amen more than once. Having these heart talks are why my podcast exist  In today's discussion we talk about faith, boundaries, self-care, relationships, white supremacy, and more. This is an epic collaboration!

With Amber Webb Sims, Courtney Napier, Faitth Brooks and Sharifa.

Connect with Amber on Instagram

Listen to Amber's Podcast

Connect with Courtney on Instagram and also here

Visit Courtney's websites here and also this website

Connect with Faitth on Instagram

Visit Faitth's website

Visit Sharifa's website

Connect with Sharifa on Instagram   

Today's bonus episode is in honor of Suicide Awareness Month and the one person every eleven minutes who decides to end their life. I start this episode by sharing my own story of being a Black woman who struggled with suicidal thoughts since the age of ten years old. I also discuss some of the thoughts and experiences that led to my attempt to end my life.  I believe that we heal when we tell our story. We heal when we're honest about our experiences, about our pain, and about our trauma. I also discuss the following:

--the importance of confronting fear, discomfort, and uncertainty

--how to have hard, uncomfortable conversations

--how to care for yourself

--the importance of community care

--how we save a life

--showing intentional love

--radical love/radical self-care

It's my hope that after listening to this episode you're able to have hard conversations with you loved ones and hopefully practice loving the people in your life and decreasing suicide rates.

Today's episode is with peacemaker, author, speaker, and advocate Diana Oestreich and we discuss her book " Waging Peace" and why this book spoke to me. I select some of my favorite passages of her book that resonated with my experience and is the story of so many active duty and veterans across the world. We discuss how we met and what it's like leaving the wilderness and connecting with others who desire friendship and community. Diana shares what it means to love people and treat people like they actually matter. We delve into the military industrial complex, military culture, and the culture of fear. Diana and I talk about the importance of naming sexual assault, suicide, racism, and other issues we witnessed and/or experienced.

Diana Oestreich is a Combat Soldier turned Peacemaker. She heard God’s call to love her enemies in the most unlikely place: on the battlefield of the Iraq war. Diana is an Activist, Veteran, Sexual assault nurse, and relentless practitioner of Peace. Whether speaking across the country or in Iran and Iraq or at her son’s middle school in Minnesota she empowers us to identify political or religious divides to cross our own “enemy lines” in order to wage peace. Because Justice and Joy can’t wait. Diana is the founder of The Waging Peace Project, a movement activating everyday peacemakers to commit acts of courage for the sake of justice + joy, rooted in a relentless belief in the power of love to transform ourselves and the world around us. Her first book was Amazon’s #1 New Release in War and Peace. Waging Peace exposes the false divide between loving our country and living out our faith's call to love our enemies--whether we perceive our enemy as the neighbor with an opposing political viewpoint, the clerk wearing a head-covering, or the refugee from a war-torn country. By showing that us-versus-them is a false choice, this book will inspire each of us to choose love over fear. Diana, her partner Jake and their two sons, Bridger and Zelalem live along the shores of Gitche Gumme on unceded Ojibwe land. She is raising her Black son to know his worth and her white son to work for justice. They are an Ethiopian-American family woven together through adoption and a shared love for bad jokes and competitive card games.

Diana’s work has been featured on: Government for Grown Ups by Sharon McMahon, For the Love Podcast with Jen Hatmaker, Preemptive Love Coalition, Red Letter Christians, Red River radio, Duluth News tribune, Veterans for Peace, League of Women Voters, American Association of University Women, Duke Endowment, National Rural Assembly, Alworth Center for the study of Peace and Justice studies, Micah Synagogue, Forging Peace Conference, Womens Speakers Collective, Rural Women's Summit, Community College of Denver Military Sexual Trauma Panel and many podcasts across the land.

www.dianaoestreich.com

www.dianaoestreich.com/waging-peace-project

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Today I am speaking to Sonja Price-Herbert about racism in the fitness industry.

Sonja shares what ignited her to specialize in anti-racism in fitness industry and how racism has personally impacted her. Sonja discusses the importance of having diverse voices from the Black community to speak on this topic and the need to create safety for Black people in fitness/wellness spaces. Sonja also delves into what we mean when we say " Black people are not a monolith",  and her thoughts on blending fitness and mental healthcare for her clients in the future.

Sonja is offering an Antiracism Refresher Course for All Fitness Professionals Saturday, September 25th 3-5pm EST

Sonja is a Classical Pilates instructor, antiracism educator/consultant, competitive powerlifters and the founder/creator of Black Girl Pilates which is a platform highlighting/supporting Black/Afro Latina Pilates instructors and Black Girl Fit & Well - a platform designed to curate health/wellness events, workshops, conferences representative of Black women. In 2020, she co-founded Melanin Brothers of Pilates with 7 Black male identifying Pilates instructors to highlight Black men who teach or take Pilates.

Sonja is committed to Black Female representation within fitness and improving the health/wellness in the Black community through writing, speaking and curating health/wellness events for Black women. 

Connect with Sonja on Instagram

Follow Sonja's Black Girl Pilates 

Follow Melanin Brothers of Pilates 

In today's episode I am speaking with Ashley Easter and we discuss what it was like for her growing up in a cult, experiencing various types of abuse, and how her intuition played a major part in her own awakening and courage to leave the only faith and family that she knew. Ashley explores how her family reacted to her change, how she grew into her full self, and how she found support from others like Rachel Held Evans and Sarah Bessey. Ashley also discussed her organization Courage 365 and the Courage 365 conference.

Ashley Easter is an intuition coach, speaker, and survivor activist. From religious cult and abuse survivor to thriving abuse survivor activist Ashley Easter empowers others to trust themselves by leveraging the science and powerful practice of tapping into their intuition for safety, abundance, and success. She is also the founder of the non-profit Courage 365 a judgement-free place for survivors of abuse—and those who love them—to gather and hear inspiring stories from other survivors about moving forward in boldness and healing. 

Follow me on Instagram

Check out my website

Visit Ashley's Website

Learn more about Courage 365 

Connect with Ashley on Instagram