This week on Footnotes: Among plants, grass is that really successful sibling you?ve always been jealous of. It?s pretty, and it can survive just about anything. But in the video above, I tell you how to manage it in the creepiest way possible.

We're talking about bootlegging, and why it isn't wise to take an American's drink away. And can you guess why boats don't wear shoes? Yeah, me neither.

Eye candy. Whose eye? God’s eye, which is an indeterminate color. We’re talking about the all-seeing eye, and it’s probably in your pocket right now, unless you’re rich.

Animals are totally jeally of humans' brains and thumbs and whatnot, so they've gone and commandeered all of our bow ties, and picked up a few smoking habits along the way. Welcome to the strange world of anthropomorphism.

This week on Footnotes: Who lives in a diving suit under the sea? Diver Dan! He also talks to fish, as it happens, even the ones on drugs.

This week on Footnotes, we go to heaven with NASA to explore the overview effect.

This week on Footnotes: Tinker Bell spaces out, while back on Earth dogs look like clouds and clouds look like dogs. In a word, pareidolia.

This week on Footnotes, we’re talking about McWords, which the marketing department at McDonald’s could really do without.

This week on Footnotes we trace the origins of “dude,” or His Dudeness, or Duder, or El Duderino, if you’re not into the whole brevity thing.

Travel to Iceland by way of Photoshop to observe sleeper sharks, flipperless seals, Björk, and vomiting chefs, then, naturally, start talking about people who eat dog food.