With Love, Men

In this episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos tackle one of the most pervasive yet unspoken challenges in modern masculinity: the dangerous entanglement of self-worth and career identity.

Through raw vulnerability and unflinching honesty, Nick reveals his own journey of career addiction—how titles, responsibilities, and external validation became the sole source of his identity until a cancer diagnosis in 2021 forced a complete reckoning. He shares the painful moments of feeling invisible at social gatherings when conversations weren't centered on his work, and how he would desperately steer discussions back to his expertise just to feel valuable again.

Jake explores the external dangers of tying identity to career, sharing a powerful story of a female client who gave 15 years to a tech company only to have her managerial role stripped away in a corporate reorganization—leaving her feeling betrayed and worthless despite her dedication. Together, they examine how men specifically fall into the trap of measuring their worth through promotions, paychecks, and professional achievements.

The conversation takes a profound turn as Nick describes his transformation during cancer treatment—how being physically unable to work revealed the depth of his career addiction, and how "Nick-sitting" sessions with his men's group showed him where his true value lay: in his relationships and community. Jake shares his own "Who Am I" list—a coffee-stained piece of paper that grounds his identity in character traits rather than professional accomplishments.

From the societal scripts handed to men about being providers and achievers, to the soul-crushing conformity that comes with never questioning these expectations, the hosts reveal how career obsession leads to constant disappointment, health issues, and ultimately contributes to the alarming statistics around men's mental health and suicide rates.

🔑 Topics Covered

• The career addiction epidemic: How titles and validation become identity
• Nick's cancer wake-up call: When illness stripped away professional identity
• The invisibility factor: Feeling worthless in non-work social situations
• External validation trap: Why there's never enough professional recognition
• The "Who Am I" exercise: Building identity beyond career achievements
• Societal scripts: The dangerous masculine blueprint of provider/achiever
• The conformity cost: How following scripts crushes the soul
• Health consequences: The link between career obsession and men's declining wellness

💡 Reflective Prompt
What would happen if your job title, salary, and professional achievements were stripped away tomorrow? Who would you be? What would define your worth? Consider asking three people who know you well: "Who am I to you—and don't mention my career."

📍Links + Resources

• Jake's website: www.jakefishbein.com
• Nick's website: www.coachnick.com
• The Arena Men's Group: www.arenamensgroup.com
• Create your own "Who Am I" list focusing on character traits and values
• Men's suicide prevention resources: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

• Jake Fishbein
• Nick Papadopoulos

With Love, Jake & Nick

In this episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos tackle one of the most avoided topics in men's conversations: pornography and its profound impact on intimacy and relationships.

With 91.5% of men aged 18-73 reporting porn consumption in the past month, this isn't a fringe issue—it's affecting nearly every man and their relationships. Nick courageously shares his traumatic first encounter with pornography at age 10, revealing how it was used as a tool of manipulation by a predator, and how his family's shame-filled reaction pushed him deeper into dangerous territory. His raw vulnerability illustrates the complex web of trauma, shame, and unhealthy patterns that can shape a man's relationship with sexuality and intimacy.

Jake explores why men rarely discuss porn or sex authentically in group settings, despite it being such a prevalent part of their lives. Together, they examine how shame, fear of vulnerability, and cultural conditioning keep these crucial conversations locked in darkness—and the devastating cost of that silence.

From financial ruin to relationship destruction, the hosts reveal how porn addiction affects real lives, including a powerful story of a man watching porn upstairs while his family gathered below—a metaphor for the isolation and disconnection that secrets create. They discuss how feelings of unworthiness drive men to retreat into fantasy rather than risk authentic requests or vulnerability with real partners.

The conversation extends to our digital age, where AI relationships and virtual interactions offer even more ways to avoid the messy, challenging, but ultimately rewarding work of real human connection.

🔑 Topics Covered

• The staggering statistics: Why 91.5% of men consume porn and what it means for relationships
• Nick's origin story: Childhood trauma, manipulation, and the birth of shame around sexuality
• The silence epidemic: Why men avoid authentic conversations about sex and intimacy
• The worthiness factor: How feelings of inadequacy drive men to fantasy instead of real connection
• The hidden costs: Financial ruin, relationship destruction, and emotional isolation
• Modern challenges: AI relationships and the increasing avoidance of human vulnerability
• Breaking the cycle: How bringing shame into the light begins the healing process

💡 Reflective Prompt
What aspects of your sexuality or relationship to intimacy are you keeping in the darkness? What conversations are you avoiding that might actually bring you closer to the connections you desire?

📍Links + Resources

• Jake's website: www.jakefishbein.com
• Nick's website: www.coachnick.com
• The Arena Men's Group: www.arenamensgroup.com

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

• Jake Fishbein
• Nick Papadopoulos

With Love, Jake & Nick

In this episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos explore a fundamental question: Are you living in the arena or watching from the stands?

Drawing inspiration from Teddy Roosevelt's famous "Man in the Arena" speech, Jake and Nick challenge listeners to step out of the safety of spectating and into the messy, vital experience of being fully alive. Through baseball metaphors, immigrant stories, and raw personal reflections, they examine what it means to show up present, vulnerable, and accountable in your own life.

Expect honest conversations about the pain of avoiding your own arena, the courage required to feel everything, and practical strategies for being present in relationships—even when triggered. This isn't about perfection; it's about the willingness to strike out swinging rather than never stepping up to bat.

🔑 Topics Covered

• The arena vs. the stands: Why spectating your life hurts more than risking failure
• How to show up present and honest in relationships when it matters most
• The immigrant mindset: Lessons in resilience and commitment from Nick's parents
• Why being triggered isn't something to avoid—it's information to work with
• Practical preparation strategies for life's most important interactions
• The difference between outcome and experience: Why aliveness trumps winning

💡 Reflective Prompt Where in your life are you sitting in the stands instead of stepping into the arena?

📍Links + Resources

• Jake's website: www.jakefishbein.com
• Nick's website: www.coachnick.com
• The Arena Men's Group: www.arenamensgroup.com

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

• Jake Fishbein
• Nick Papadopoulos

With Love, Jake & Nick

In this episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos dive into a question at the heart of modern masculinity: What gives men their sense of self-worth?

From childhood heartbreaks to the quiet pressures of adulthood, Jake and Nick explore how men lose touch with their intrinsic value—and how they can reclaim it. They share personal stories of early rejections, the cultural myth of the self-sacrificing man, and the long, often painful journey to realizing you matter simply because you exist.

Expect deep reflections, laughter, a powerful reminder that comparison is the thief of joy, and a practical invitation to build your self-worth from the inside out—not from likes, titles, or someone else’s approval.

🔑 Topics Covered

How early relationships shape a man’s sense of worth
The hidden dangers of the “self-sacrificing man” myth
Why real self-worth starts with internal validation
How to reconnect with what genuinely fills you up
The role of community, connection, and being seen
Why you don’t need permission to matter—you already do

 💡 Reflective Prompt

What’s one small step you could take today to honor your own worth?

📍Links + Resources

Jake’s website: www.jakefishbein.com
Nick’s website: www.coachnick.com
The Arena Men’s Group: www.arenamensgroup.com

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

Jake Fishbein
Nick Papadopoulos

With Love,
Jake & Nick

In this episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos dive into the surprisingly complex world of sharing—why it’s so damn hard for men, and why it might be the most transformational thing they can do.

From childhood messages about “manning up” to the unspoken fear of losing an edge, Jake and Nick explore the emotional minefields that keep men quiet—and the magic that happens when they speak. Nick reflects on how writing about his cancer journey turned darkness into light. Jake opens up about oversharing, the tension between TMI and true connection, and how vulnerability isn’t about sharing secrets or crying—it’s about doing anything where you don't know what the outcome will be.

They unpack why good news can be harder to share than bad, how men mistake humility for silence, and why simply appreciating your morning coffee might be a radical act of love.

Expect real talk, laughter, a surprise hotel lobby gymnastics moment, and a powerful reminder: sharing isn’t self-indulgent—it’s an act of generosity. Especially when done with love.

🔑 Topics Covered

Why men are afraid to share
TMI vs. real vulnerability
Sharing as healing and service
Why men struggle to share good news
The power of sharing joy—not just pain
Emotional risk and emotional intelligence
How to start building your sharing muscle

💡 Reflective Prompt

What’s one thing you haven’t shared that’s ready to be said?

📍Links + Resources

Jake’s website: www.jakefishbein.com
Nick’s website: www.coachnick.com
The Arena Men’s Group: www.arenamensgroup.com

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

Jake Fishbein
Nick Papadopoulos

With Love,
Jake & Nick

In this inaugural episode of With Love, Men, co-hosts Jake Fishbein and Nick Papadopoulos dive into the big, beautiful, messy question: What does it mean to be a man today?

Drawing from their 25+ years leading men’s groups and their own personal journeys, Jake and Nick explore success, role modeling, emotional expression, fatherhood, heartbreak, vulnerability, and how real change often requires crisis—or courage.

Expect raw conversation, laughter, deep reflection, and an invitation to step into the arena of modern masculinity—with love.

🔑 Topics Covered

• Redefining success for men
• Fatherhood in a media-saturated world
• The power of modeling vs. lecturing
• Why so many men fear heartbreak
• Vulnerability between men vs. with women
• Replacing old scripts with new truths
• "The Man Box" and breaking free

📍Links + Resources

• Jake’s website: www.jakefishbein.com
• Nick’s website: www.coachnick.com
• The Arena Men’s Group: www.arenamensgroup.com

💼 Connect with Us on LinkedIn:

• Jake Fishbein
• Nick Papadopoulos

With Love,
Jake & Nick

When men become fathers, what impact does that have on their identity, way of living, and sense of self? Is it something they prepare for or something that’s sprung on them?

Few relationships impact a man as much as his relationship with his father, whether his father was absent or present. Many times, the nature of this relationship carries far into his life and impacts how he chooses to be a father, in his own right, or whether he chooses to be a father at all. While conversations for women around motherhood are commonplace in our society, it’s rarer for young men to be asked to explore their own relationship with fatherhood before becoming fathers themselves.

In this 75-minute conversation, Coach Jake Fishbein and Dr. Grinman explore what fatherhood means to men and how men can prepare for fatherhood. They share their own experiences and explore how the lack of conversation about intentional fatherhood impacts our society in many ways. And they talk about what’s possible for men, women, their children, and their communities when men engage in a conversation about fatherhood long before becoming fathers themselves.

To learn more about The Arena Series, visit www.thearenaseries.com.

Coach Nick Papadopoulos, Coach Jake Fishbein, and Dr. Jessica Koblenz to explore ‘Men & The Cave’ in this 75-minute conversation.

When men are living in the cave, what impact does it have on their mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being? When men don’t take care of themselves, what’s the impact on them and others?

For men, it can be challenging and societally unacceptable to ask for help or to admit when something is wrong and isn’t working. Instead of acknowledging the need for support or change, many men retreat to the metaphorical cave instead. While the cave can feel safe, it ultimately gets in the way of men taking care of themselves and asking for the support they need. And when men don’t take care of themselves, the people around them are impacted.

In this 75-minute conversation, Coach Nick, Coach Jake, and Dr. Koblenz explored alternatives to the cave and what’s possible for men when they ask for support and take care of their mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. They share their own experiences of retreating to the cave and how disconnecting has impacted their lives and relationships. And they talk about what’s possible for men, women, and even organizations when men are encouraged to speak up about their challenges rather than retreat and hide.

To learn more about Coach Nick & Coach Jake, visit www.thearenaweekend.com.

In this hour-long conversation, Coach Nick Papadopoulos, Coach Jake Fishbein, and Dr. Jessica Koblenz explore Men & Intimacy. 

What does intimacy mean to men? What gets in the way of men experiencing and creating the intimacy they desire?

Men often find themselves in a competitive mindset, focused on winning and accomplishment. While this mindset can lead to tremendous tangible results, it can also get in the way of men creating intimate relationships.

In this conversation, we explore how men can experience greater intimacy in their lives. We’ll share our own experiences with intimacy and what’s gotten in the way for us as we’ve looked to create meaningful relationships with partners, friends, and family. And we’ll talk about what’s possible when men (and women) allow for greater intimacy in their relationships.

Coach Nick, Coach Jake, and special guest Stephanie D’Ambra explore Men & Friendship in this episode of The Arena Series.

What does friendship mean to men in general?

How has COVID-19 impacted men’s relationship to friendship?

There are many stereotypes and jokes about male friendship, but most of the time we don’t talk about what’s at the core and what’s possible when men connect with each other (and women) in different ways. In this hour-long conversation, we’ll talk about how men usually choose friendships that are side-by-side and activity-based vs. face-to-face friendships grounded in vulnerability. 

We explore why men don’t always share with their male friends and often turn to women for emotional support during challenging times. In the age of Covid, where so many of the traditional male bonding opportunities have vanished, it’s more important than ever for men to redefine what it means to be friends and how they interact with their communities and themselves.