READ: GENESIS 32:24-32; HOSEA 12:3-5; EPHESIANS 4:22-24

When I was an RA (resident assistant) in college, I had this resident who used to tell me she and God had been “wrestling” about something. She would spend entire days with the Lord, crying and repenting, and wrestling with Him about different behaviors and attitudes in her life.

Now, I had been a Christian for a while at that point, but I didn’t understand what she meant by that. Why would God, as she would say, “knock her out” like that?

But then tonight, nearly two years later, a friend and I were talking about a ministry role that she is in. She made a reference to how she and the Lord are “negotiating” how long she’s going to be there. And I realized that I think I finally know what my resident meant.

I’ve had so many situations since those conversations with her when the Lord and I have wrestled. When we have negotiated. When I have wanted my way, and the Holy Spirit has convicted me otherwise. I’ve had cry sessions in the car when I’ve confessed to the Lord that I can’t do this. I don’t know how to do this right.

And while we may metaphorically wrestle with God, in Genesis 32, a man named Jacob actually physically wrestled with God. Then, God gave Jacob a new name: Israel, which means “struggle (with or of) God.”

I’ve learned so much from having these vulnerable moments with God—not that you’re necessarily changing God’s mind on something, but you’re engaging with Him, learning from Him, and redefining your heart to His purpose. Together. • Natty Maelle

• Many Bible scholars think that Jacob actually wrestled with Jesus, who is God the Son. Jesus loves us, and He welcomes our wrestling matches. He knows we won’t always understand His plans, decisions, or commands. But when we don’t like what He has to say, He doesn’t want us to ignore Him or try to hide our thoughts and feelings. He wants us to be totally honest with Him! He wants us to tell Him about how we feel and wrestle with Him over it. That doesn’t mean He’s going to change His mind, but it will help us know—and trust—Him better.

• Are you wrestling with something right now, but you’re afraid to give it to the Lord? Jesus has your best interests at heart. He loves you and wants to help you grow. Holding back from Him can only keep you from the goodness He offers. What do you need to wrestle with Him about today?

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)