Silent tears poem. Sometimes our pain is what pushes us into our purpose. I have used writing as a way to express my pain and connect with others.

Our mental houses are clutter while we look to find our missing shoe we thought we put in the closet. Organized chaos is a contradiction, attached to traumatic experiences. Diving deeper into my trama by addressing it by the name, my failed relationships with my siblings due to being in foster care. Being in foster care is traumatizing but not being able to share a connection with your family is more hurtful. Let’s talk about it. This episode is dedicated to Sharonda Swanson, my mother may she rest in peace. Nakupenda mama!

Hi

Have you felt that you were being rejected by your biological and foster family? Maybe you felt like you didn’t fit in their square box because you are a circle. I have too but didn’t know how I felt about until I became an adult. Rejection hurts but should be acknowledged. Follow me on Instagram and TikTok @yemojaspeaks

When difficult times come what do you do? I find myself on the verge of giving up until I remember my purpose. I reflect over my journey and all of my decisions. While I do not make excuses for my choices I do understand that my decisions were made based on my emotions and limit information. As I think about my future I know that my past will always be there to remind me of my decisions. However, I will be emotional mature to conquer my future reactions to the choices of my past.

When out physical environment is out of order our mental is usually in the same state. The first thing is to have a focus that is so strong that you don’t want to pull away from it. I had to clean my house and breathe to slow down. I needed to be still to find clarity.

It requires us to look at ourselves in the mirror to be honest. We have allowed people to walk all over us but now we are taking our power back through reflecting.

Foster parents post COVID is difficult. Many foster parents were concerned about transmission of the virus but now we are still facing an issue with limited foster parents signing up.

The challenge of being a foster is rewarding.

Did you know we can develop an emotional addiction? It is the emotional connection that we have with others knowing that the relationship is unhealthy but we stay because it is familiar.