You'll Only Listen Twice

We’re an all time high, fellow listers, as Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ producer Paul are taking about Debussy, wait a second, that’s not right. The boys are actually talking about Octopussy, the 1983 James Bond adventure. (And no, this is not a porno episode) Roger Moore is back as 007 at possibly his most heroic, but he still has time to clown around, literally. Director John Glen is back and more ambitious as he delicately balances the film’s tonal shifts from classical adventure pulp and Hitchcockian thriller. But that’s not all, our heroes are talking about Maud Adams’ second Bond girl role as the title character, Louis Jourdan’s nasty performance as Kamal Khan, crocodile suits, and Tarzan yells. Oh my! The boys also stress that none of this show is plagiarized. This is a professional film criticism podcast program that is certainly good enough for Nebula. With that said, curl up with your little Octopussy and enjoy this very special episode.

This episode is for your eyes only, fellow listeners, or rather, for your ears only (this is a podcast after all) because Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ producer Paul are taking a closer look at the Roger Moore James Bond adventure, For Your Eyes Only. Longtime editor John Glen is in the director’s chair for a film that sees 007 come back down to Earth, literally and metaphorically, with a grounded spy story that harkens back to the original Ian Fleming novels. Does it succeed or are the results more wrinkley than Roger Moore’s face? Find out as the boys talk about the film’s themes of revenge, its weird tonal shifts, and whether it’s similar to the Burt Reynolds movie Gator. There will be plenty of action, suspense and, of course, Topol. Tune in and we’ll buy you a delicatessen. In stainless steel!

Salutations fellow listeners! Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ producer Paul are blasting off into space to review James Bond ’s epic space adventure, Moonraker. Strap in for a high flying journey as our heroes discuss the film’s production history, its lavish effects, and whether or not it is the stupidest 007 film of all time. Of course, they can't resist talking about that double-take pigeon.. Some old friends are attempting re-entry into the series as Roger Moore returns for his fourth outing as James Bond, Lewis Gilbert is back in the director’s chair, and Jaws makes his epic encore reappearance - except now he's looking for love. Hang on tight because this episode ain’t about science fiction, it’s about science fact!

Nobody does it better than Roger Moore’s third outing as James Bond, The Spy Who Loved Me. Well, at least that’s something our heroes can agree on in this episode. Listen as Jake, Troy, Jan and good ol’ producer Paul dive deep into the depths of insanity as they argue on whether this film is about the monomyth of 007, Barbara Bach’s performance as the titular beautiful spy, whether or not Stromberg is worthy Bond villain, and Jaws, just Jaws. Have our heroes finally lost their minds? Was this podcast a mistake? Find out! We would also like to apologize to the people of Bristol for the insensitive comments made by some of our hosts. These views do not reflect the values of “You’ll Only Listen Twice.” 

Three nipples? What will they think of next? Join Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ producer Paul as they take on Roger Moore’s second outing as James Bond 007, The Man with the Golden Gun. Though the film was critically maligned and not the biggest box office success, the boys have a lot to say about Guy Hamilton and Tom “Mank” Mankiewicz’s farewell to the Bond series. From the lush islands of Phuket, to the streets of Bangkok, listen as they gush about legendary actor, Christopher Lee’s performance as the villain, Scaramanga, marvel at the amazing loop de loop car stunt, disagree on whether Mary Goodnight is a notable Bond girl, and scream with glee at the valiant return of Sheriff J.W. Pepper. Of course there is also Nick Nack, we can’t forget about one of the the series’ most memorable henchman! So, hop into your flying Ford Pinto and take in out thoughts on The Man with the Golden Gun.

Holy sh**! The boys are back to talk about Roger Moore’s first outing as James Bond, Live and Let Die. Does it hold up, or do people just like the song? Find out as Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ Producer Paul dive into the film’s racial politics, Tom “Mank” Mankiewicz’s sophomore Bond script, Guy Hamilton’s lazy direction (sound familiar?). This episode is surely our least controversial and political episode. Right? We don’t even make fun of the CIA. Oh no, I’ve said too much!

Good evening, fellow listers, Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ producer Paul are taking a look at one of the weirdest James Bond movies ever made (and that’s saying something), Diamonds Are Forever. Rather than being based on the Ian Fleming novel of the same name, this film is based on a half remembered dream Cubby Broccoli once had of his old friend Howard “Sam” Hughes. Move over George Lazenby, John Gavin is here… oh wait, Sean Connery is stumbling onto set in his final(?) outing as 007, and don’t worry, he brought back the toupée. Prepare your battle subs as the boys talk about Guy Hamilton’s lazy direction, Tom “Mank” Mankiewicz's lackluster Bond screenwriting debut, whether or not Charles Gray is the best cinematic Blofeld in the entire series, and how this film is shot in Panavision yet looks like a t.v. movie. Why does it look like Vegas????!!!

Happy holidays, fellow listeners! Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ Producer Paul are joined by special guest Doggify to talk about the heartwarming (and certainly not tragic) James Bond Christmas classic, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. I’m sure you have all the time in the world to listen to our heroes discuss George Lazenby’s one and done tenure as 007, Diana Rigg’s powerhouse performance as the love of Bond’s life, Tracy, Peter Hunt’s stunning direction, and whether Telly Savalas’s Blofeld is the worst prankster ever. Grab your skis and don’t forget your radioactive lint, because this is an episode you won’t want to miss. This never happened to the other podcast! Merry Christmas!

This week, Jake, Troy, Jan, and good ol’ Producer Paul take a detour to Italy to talk about the rip-off James Bond film starring Sean Connery’s brother, Neil, O.K. Connery also known as Operation Kid Brother, Operation Double 007 and Divided Evil. You may ask yourself, “Wait a sec… This isn’t a James Bond film!” Well, Bernard Lee and Lois Maxwell are basically M and Moneypenny in it, so I guess that counts. (We’re really skirting the line between official and unofficial Bond movies at this point.  Direct your ire towards Troy, this review is all his fault) Get ready as our heroes do their best to not talk about the adventures of Dr. Neil Connery, plastic surgeon, hypnotist, spy, and the greatest Scotsman to ever speak with an American accent, and instead talk about the many tragedies of Neil Connery, plasterer, actor, and all around jinx. Beware, this review is too much for one mother! 

Welcome to Japan fellow listeners, as Jake, Troy, Jan and good ol’ Producer Paul take on the James Bond film that inspired the name of this program, You Only Live Twice. Journey down the rabbit hole, or rather down the secret spy slide, as our heroes discuss “Alfie” director, Lewis Gilbert’s first foray into the world of 007, the lush cinematography of of Freddie Young, the screenplay by famed uncontroversial children’s book author, Roald Dahl, the $1 million volcano lair designed by Ken Adam, and, of course, James Bond’s infamous disguise. Be sure to avoid being shot in a Murphy bed, because you only live twice. I love you.