Your Boys Took A Hell Of A Beating

Norwich City 3 Liverpool 5 needs little introduction from us in terms of the football. But there’s more.

Revelations that Norwich are about to build a stand with the first licensed pub in English football; Mick McGuire changes his shorts; Peter Mendham is carried off by two men taking a leg each, like he’s a giant wishbone, after ‘pulling a tummy muscle’; a Visionhire inspired Proustian rush; Liverpool infiltrate the ball boy ranks.

At The Hawthorns, Cyrille Regis enjoys his 22nd birthday and perhaps enjoys a celebratory carton of orange courtesy of the touchline prowling usherettes. And finally, a goal glut at The Dell.

It’s the turn of Aston Villa fan Ivan McDouall to open his heart to Gary Thacker on the subject of his favourite football ground - Villa Park.

England host Ireland at Wembley in a European Championship qualifier having already made it through to the Italian beanfeast in prospect.

It’s basically a game of no halves, a Wembley night where precious little happens. Drama comes courtesy of a collision between David Johnson and Gerry Peyton, where after the magical properties of a sponge soaked in water fail to get him back on his feet, Johnson is carried off on a stretcher. Peyton makes his whoozy way to the touchline to be replaced too.

As ever in 1979/80, it’s left to Kevin Keegan to lift England, his second goal an outrageous disguised chip that sails in to seal the win. Beyond that, Bryan Robson makes his England debut and Laurie Cunningham is frozen out of the future.

Joe Byatt talks to Gary Thacker about his memories of Stoke City’s Victoria Ground - with a bit of Bet365 thrown in for good measure.

It’s Dave Bowler’s turn to tell Gary Thacker all about the ground he calls home - The Hawthorns.

A mystery own goal at Kenilworth Road is resolved by Moore of the Yard, an early appearance for Gary Lineker on Match of the Day, Eddie Kelly threatens a referee with violence, and the Filbert Street Ultras throw a bottle of Fairy Liquid at the Newcastle goalkeeper. Then, join us for Turf Moor On Ice, starring Leighton James.

In the second of our new Series, Steven Scragg tells Gary Thacker all about the stadium he calls home - Anfield.

The Baseball Ground in February 1980 and the relegation haunted Rams are banking on new signing Alan Biley to fire them out of trouble. Sporting a glorious mullet, Biley is a vision in Derby’s satin-look white shirt which he wears over his shorts and almost down to his knees, like Rod Stewart in a fetish nightie.

Do we think he’s sexy? Not when he’s being carried off on a stretcher.

To White Hart Lane, where a parachutist ends up in Tottenham High Road, the referee sports the most extravagant syrup, and Belfast takes on the Balkans as Gerry Armstrong, Ivan Golac and many others take part in a full scale punch up. Outcome? No bookings. Brian Moore is the tic-tac man fir Mick Channon, passing information on from the commentary box on the failure of his horses. Jimmy Greaves is interviewed and tells us about garage doors.

Meanwhile at Maine Road, Malcolm Allison discovers that hell hath no fury like a Peter Barnes scorned.

In the first of a new series hosted by Gary Thacker, he talks to Chris Lepkowski about a stadium that is close to his heart - Wembley.

What makes it special, what are Chris’ memories of the place, and how does the new measure up to the old?

Welcome ladies and gentlemen to the Clive Thomas show, with occasional guest appearances from Tottenham and Swindon. The whistler from Porthcawl gives an indirect free-kick inside the area for an innocuous foul that persuaded Ossie Ardiles to dive from 10 yards outside the box, but he’s only just warming up. He gives Swindon a penalty that nobody is claiming, allows Gerry Armstrong to score a goal that even he thinks is offside and gives Spurs another indirect free-kick in the box, then blows for time before they can take it.

Meanwhile, an unidentified member of Sham 69 comes lumbering onto the pitch before a corner, kicks the ball into the crowd and runs off. The crowd then hand him over to the rozzers, while Peter Taylor warms up in a luminous top that makes him and the Great Wall of China the only things on earth that you can see from space.

Don’t let this distract you from the fact that here we are seeing very early evidence of Spursyness.