For many young people navigating their identity, the distance between who they are and who they are pretending to be is a landscape of quiet terror. Our guest this week is author, digital creator, and modern parenting voice Sean Szeps. Known to his massive global audience for his unfiltered humour and joyful, chaotic look at life as a queer dad, Sean has built a digital sanctuary rooted in radical self-acceptance.

But behind the infectious laughs and viral videos lies the memory of a boy who carried a suffocating weight for far too long.

In this deeply moving conversation, Sean takes us back to his childhood years in New Hampshire, pulling back the curtain on the intense anxiety, stress, and isolation that defined his youth. For years, he suffered in silence, trapped behind a wall of religious dogma and societal stigma that convinced him his truth was inherently broken. We explore the gruelling mental toll of hiding your true self—the constant vigilance, the fear of abandonment, and the exhausting worry of what might happen if the secret ever slipped out.

But everything changed at 11 o'clock on a Tuesday night, as a 15-year-old Sean finally found the immense courage to stand in his mother's bedroom doorway, shaking and sobbing, to hand her a letter. In that pivotal moment, his mother pulled him into an unbreakable embrace: "I love you more than anything in the world. There is nothing you could ever do wrong that will change that. I've got you."

This is an extraordinary, heart-wrenching, and ultimately triumphant look at the power of parental grace and unconditional love, and the courage to tell people who you really are.

📺 WE ARE ON YOUTUBE! Don't just listen—watch the full video version of this episode and subscribe to our channel so you never miss a moment: https://www.youtube.com/@YoureAGoodKidPodcast

📸 FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: For exclusive episode clips, behind-the-scenes insights, and show updates, follow us at @youragoodkidpodcast.

⭐️ LEAVE A REVIEW: If you’re enjoying the show and want to support us, please take a quick moment to drop us a review or a 5-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps other "good kids" find our community!

Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions of childhood self-harm. If this raises any difficult feelings for you, please reach out for support. In Australia, you can contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636. International listeners can find local resources at findahelpline.com.

Credits: Produced and Hosted by Dr James van Cuylenburg & Nick van Cuylenburg.

Audio production by White Owl Sound.

Season 2 is brought to you by Engage 1on1 Psychology

Special thanks to the wonderful Julia Ferracane from Righteous PR for introducing us to Sean and for recommending him as a guest.

If you believe in what we are doing and would like to support us to make more, then we will gratefully accept any donations here: https://youreagoodkid.com.au/support

Today's guest has graced the absolute pinnacle of the Australian modeling and media landscape; author, podcaster, and former model Ali Brahe-Daddo. As the definitive cover girl for Dolly, Cleo, and Cosmopolitan, Ali built a public persona in the late 80s and 90s that looked to the world like the ultimate health, happiness, and triumph.

But what happens when you strip away the flawless public image? In this deeply moving interview, Ali connects with her youth in a profoundly raw and emotional way. She opens up about a pivotal reality that had a major impact on her development: the intense isolation she experienced as a young girl, spending much of her childhood feeling unseen despite her massive public visibility.

Ali shares how these early dynamics reshaped her internal messaging, her desire to downplay herself and please others back to her childhood search for safety and structure. We also dive into how Ali has come full circle for her audience. The very same generation of women who looked up to her as a teen icon on their favorite magazine covers now look to her for guidance in midlife. Through her hit book Queen Menopause: Finding Your Majesty in the Mayhem, Ali has broken down walls and destigmatized the aging process, helping many women step out of the shadows of the "invisible years" and reclaim their power.

In their post-interview debrief, James and Nick unpack the fascinating psychology behind Ali's childhood blueprint:

• The Blueprint of People-Pleasing: How early childhood isolation and unmet needs can subconsciously create rigid "schemas"—internalized rules that convince us we must morph to please others just to secure safety, structure, and avoid abandonment.

• The Cover-Girl Paradox: Exploring the disconnect between external validation and internal belief, and why being an "invisible icon" on the front of Dolly or Cleo proves that global adoration can never replace the foundational, focused attention a child needs from those closest to them.

• From Teen Icon to Midlife Guide: How confronting the vulnerabilities of her past allowed Ali to become the ultimate companion for women navigating menopause—shifting the narrative from societal invisibility to internal majesty.

This is a rare, captivating look at a familiar face, proving that no matter how flawless the image we build as adults, we are all still carrying the boys and girls we used to be.

📺 WE ARE ON YOUTUBE! Don't just listen—watch the full video version of this episode and subscribe to our channel so you never miss a moment: https://www.youtube.com/@YoureAGoodKidPodcast

📸 FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: For exclusive episode clips, behind-the-scenes insights, and show updates, follow us at @youragoodkidpodcast.

⭐️ LEAVE A REVIEW: If you’re enjoying the show and want to support us, please take a quick moment to drop us a review or a 5-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps other "good kids" find our community!

Credits: Produced and Hosted by Dr James van Cuylenburg & Nick van Cuylenburg.

Audio production by White Owl Sound.

Season 2 is brought to you by Engage 1on1 Psychology

If you believe in what we are doing and would like to support us to make more, then we will gratefully accept any donations here: https://youreagoodkid.com.au/support

Today, we had the opportunity to speak to one of the most beloved media personalities in Australia. Our guest this week is advertising titan, broadcaster, and media executive Russel Howcroft. Widely known as the brilliant, sharp-witted panelist on ABC’s smash-hit show Gruen, and the co-host of Melbourne’s top-rated 3AW Breakfast radio program, Russel has spent decades at the absolute pinnacle of the Australian marketing world. He is the epitome of the refined, successful marketing man—a brand built on confidence, strategy, and triumph.

But what happens when you strip away the polished corporate image?

In this deeply moving interview, Russell connects with his youth in a way he rarely does publicly, in a revealing and emotional way. He opens up about a pivotal moment that had a profound impact on his development: the separation of his parents when he was a boy. Russell shares how this early disruption reshaped his worldview, and he traces the ultimate origins of his relentless drive to achieve and succeed back to his childhood dynamics.

He also shares a beautiful, deep connection to his past through nostalgic memories—particularly the safe, magical time spent at his grandfather’s house, which served as a crucial emotional sanctuary.

In their post-interview debrief, James and Nick unpack the fascinating psychology behind Russell's childhood blueprint:

The Architecture of Ambition: How early changes in family stability, like parental separation, can subconsciously ignite a powerful, lifelong drive to create order, security, and monumental success.

Nostalgia as a Psychological Anchor: The restorative power of childhood memories and how having a safe sanctuary provides a child with a vital blueprint for emotional security.

The Persona vs. The Inner Child: Exploring the contrast between the highly successful "adult brand" we present to the world and the deeply feeling child that still exists beneath it.

This is a rare, captivating look at a familiar face, proving that no matter how big the brand we build as adults, we are all still carrying the boys and girls we used to be.

📺 WE ARE ON YOUTUBE! Don't just listen—watch the full video version of this episode and subscribe to our channel so you never miss a moment: https://www.youtube.com/@YoureAGoodKidPodcast

📸 FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: For exclusive episode clips, behind-the-scenes insights, and show updates, follow us at @youragoodkidpodcast.

⭐️ LEAVE A REVIEW: If you’re enjoying the show and want to support us, please take a quick moment to drop us a review or a 5-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps other "good kids" find our community!

As mentioned in the episode, please check out the wonderul podcast Modern Wisdom.

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/23-lessons-from-2025-1034/id1347973549?i=1000741796108

Credits: Produced and Hosted by Dr James van Cuylenburg & Nick van Cuylenburg.

Audio production by White Owl Sound.

Season 2 is brought to you by Engage 1on1 Psychology

If you believe in what we are doing and would like to support us to make more, then we will gratefully accept any donations here: https://youreagoodkid.com.au/support

On the second episode of Season 2, we are joined by someone who defines what it means to live authentically, fiercely, and out loud. Don't forget, you can watch this full, raw conversation right now over on our new YouTube channel!

Our guest this week is Australian media powerhouse, entrepreneur, and bestselling author Sophie Cachia. Rising to prominence as one of Australia’s first major digital creators, Sophie has built an absolute empire, founding successful businesses and capturing the nation's attention on Survivor Australia. She is also the author of the bestselling memoir Then There Was Her, a beautifully honest account of navigating her sexuality, identity, and life in the public eye.

But behind the business acumen, the digital influence, and the fierce public persona lies a deeply guarded childhood reality that Sophie is now sharing with a profound level of vulnerability: as a child, she was self-harming. It was a silent, internal storm—a secret pain that no one around her knew about. To the outside world, she was a bright, capable kid, but inside, she was navigating an overwhelming emotional weight without the tools to express it.

In their post-interview debrief, James and Nick step into the psychology of the "invisible struggle": A sensitive clinical look at why children turn to self-harm, exploring it not as attention-seeking behavior, but as a desperate attempt to regulate overwhelming internal pain when words fail, and the immense psychological freedom that comes from finally bringing your secret pain into the light.

This is a heavy, beautiful, and profoundly necessary conversation about the burdens children carry in silence, and the radical healing that happens when we choose to be honest with ourselves and each other.

📺 WE ARE ON YOUTUBE! Don't just listen—watch the full video version of this episode and subscribe to our channel so you never miss a moment: https://www.youtube.com/@YoureAGoodKidPodcast

📸 FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: For exclusive episode clips, behind-the-scenes insights, and show updates, follow us at @youragoodkidpodcast.

⭐️ LEAVE A REVIEW: If you’re enjoying the show and want to support us, please take a quick moment to drop us a review or a 5-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps other "good kids" find our community!

Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions of childhood self-harm. If this raises any difficult feelings for you, please reach out for support. In Australia, you can contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636. International listeners can find local resources at findahelpline.com.

Credits: Produced and Hosted by Dr James van Cuylenburg & Nick van Cuylenburg.

Audio production by White Owl Sound.

Season 2 is brought to you by Engage 1on1 Psychology

Special thanks to the wonderful Julia Ferracane from Righteous PR for introducing us to Sophie and for recommending her as a guest.

If you believe in what we are doing and would like to support us to make more, then we will gratefully accept any donations here: https://youreagoodkid.com.au/support

Welcome back to You're a Good Kid! We are thrilled to kick off Season 2 with an absolute powerhouse of a guest. Not only are we back with a brand new lineup of deeply moving conversations, but we are officially on YouTube this season! You can now watch the full video episodes of our interviews and debriefs.

Our premier guest for Season 2 is the phenomenal Kween Kong (Thomas Charles Fonua). Before capturing hearts worldwide as a finalist on RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under (Season 2) and representing Oceania on RuPaul's Drag Race Global All Stars, Thomas was a celebrated principal dancer for New Zealand's Black Grace and the Australian Dance Theatre. An award-winning choreographer, cultural leader, Logie Award nominee, and founder of the Haus of Kong, Kween has spent her career breaking boundaries and advocating for Pacific and First Nations queer youth. But behind the global success, the runway glamour, and the artistic accolades lies a profound childhood story of survival, identity, and resilience.

Growing up as Thomas in South Auckland, life presented a complex web of challenges from an early age. Discovering his queerness as a young child meant navigating intense rejection from a strict Jehovah’s Witness church community and an abusive father. Yet, amidst the trauma and the pressure to suppress his true self, an extraordinary shield emerged. It came from the fierce love of his mother and grandmother, who handed him a psychological lifeline with a single, transformative sentence: "You are not different, you are more."

This is an unforgettable story about the heavy cost of hiding who you are, the breathtaking courage it takes to step into your truth, and the enduring power of unconditional love.

📺 WE ARE ON YOUTUBE! Don't just listen—watch the full video version of this episode and subscribe to our channel so you never miss a moment: https://www.youtube.com/@YoureAGoodKidPodcast

📸 FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: For exclusive episode clips, behind-the-scenes insights, and show updates, follow us at @youragoodkidpodcast.

⭐️ LEAVE A REVIEW: If you’re enjoying the show and want to support us, please take a quick moment to drop us a review or a 5-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps other "good kids" find our community!

Disclaimer: This podcast discussed mental health themes that may be triggering for some listeners. If anything in this episode causes distress, please contact your health professional, or if urgent, speak with Lifeline on 13 11 14

Credits: Produced and Hosted by Dr James van Cuylenburg & Nick van Cuylenburg.

Audio production by White Owl Sound.

Season 2 is brought to you by Engage 1on1 Psychology

If you believe in what we are doing and would like to support us to make more, then we will gratefully accept any donations here: https://youreagoodkid.com.au/support

Season 2 of You're A Good Kid has arrived! 12 new interviews with simply amazing guests, all of whom shared such vulnerable and powerful stories. We can't wait to share it with you all.

To see child-photos shared by guests, and some video clips from each episode, follow on Instragram: (https://www.instagram.com/youreagoodkidpodcast).

What we go through as kids will shape the course of our lives. Join James van Cuylenburg (Clinical Psychologist) and his brother, Nick van Cuylenburg (White Owl Sound), as they speak with a diverse range of people about how their childhoods have shaped them. Then, listen to guests read a letter to their child-selves. If you could say anything to your child-self, what would you say? Welcome back, to You're A Good Kid.

James and Nick get together for a quick chat about the inaugural season of You're A Good Kid, and point the way forwards from here!

A sincere thank you to all our guests for season 1, and for all of you who have joined us on the journey so far. Lots more to come, we'll look forward to sharing more stories with you in the coming months!

Nobody gets through life easy. Each of us has our own challenges and pains to manage as we navigate our different upbringings. But it’s a simple fact that some childhood stories are so incredibly difficult and traumatic, you wonder how someone could possibly survive it, let alone grow to thrive in the aftermath. Rosie Waterland is something of a miracle. These days she’s a celebrated author, comedian and podcaster (and just a wonderful human being). But if there was a checklist of childhood risk factors, it’s fair to say Rosie’s upbringing would tick almost all of them.

Rosie is currently touring the country promoting her new book, “Broken Brains”, co-written with colleague and friend, Jamila Rizvi. Today we are incredibly grateful to share our chat with Rosie, which while ultimately uplifting, does cover several heavy topics, including a discussion of suicide and self-harm. Listener discretion is advised, and if support is required please speak to your mental health professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

Check out 'Broken Brains' https://www.amazon.com.au/Broken-Brains-Jamila-Rizvi-ebook/dp/B0DP1F65Z8/Check out 'The Anti-Cool Girl': https://tinyurl.com/4axvxsu7/

To follow Rosie, please head to https://www.instagram.com/rosiewaterland/

To see clips from Rosie’s episode, please follow us at https://www.instagram.com/youreagoodkidpodcast

Mark Leach is an Anglican Minister of 25 years and co-founder of 'Never Again Is Now', an organisation campaigning passionately against antisemitism.

As a child, Mark grew up in war-torn Zimbabwe. His extraordinary story includes significant trauma, which Mark has spent his life learning to understand, while also rediscovering hope through his relationships, his faith and his mission to teach and inspire.

As you will hear, he's a wonderful storyteller, with so much wisdom to share, and speaks with immense vulnerability and courage.

Please note this episode details stories of childhood trauma and abuse, including sexual abuse, which may be triggering for some listeners.

If the episode raises concerns for you regarding your own mental health, please contact your health provider, or you can speak with www.casahouse.com.au# for supprt releated to sexual abuse. If the concern is urgent, please call Lifeline on 13 11 14.

To learn more about Mark's campaign against antisemetism, head to www.neveragainisnow.com.au#

To see Mark's child photos as discussed in the episode, head to www.instagram.com/youreagoodkidpodcast#

Tessa Lee is an esteemed Lawyer who began life in Malaysia. She and her family immigrated to Australia when Tessa was just 6, and faced many hardhips as they adjusted to life in a new country. In the absense of a traditionally loving and warm home, Tessa developed a highly self-critical mindset, driven towards success to prove her self-worth, which culminated in a diagnosis of OCD as an adult.

Now, Tessa is on a pathway to resdisover joy and a sense of belonging, and is bravely sharing her story to encourage others. We are very grateful to Tessa for travelling across the country to speak with us, and are certain her powerful story will inspire many.

To see Tessa's childhood photos discussed in the episode, head to https://www.instagram.com/youreagoodkidpodcast/#