YTG

The term gaslighting was introduced in a play that featured interaction between an abusive husband who created an elaborate deception explicitly designed to control and disrupt his wife's emotional equilibrium. In 2014 I first discovered this term and created this piece. The term is currently ubiquitous, so I decide to publish because I believe that this story has relevance to emotional abuse and possibly stalking.

The conventional wisdom is, look before leaping. In this instance there was no time to look or to think. The reality of the situation demanded a spontaneous reactive response with no room for contemplative thoughts. I looked; I saw and leaping into action was the solo requirement at that time.

As I sat in the parking lot of the eye doctor my thoughts came at me like a flood. I was reflecting about my father on the anniversary of his passing. I remembered that he had 2 eyeglasses which I never fully understood until it happened to me. Yep, I needed two pairs for divided vision. One for driving and another for the computer and for reading.

This talk was incidental and unplanned. Initially, my intention was just to sing into my digital recorder, one of my Favorite songs. It began with the song "the love inside" by my favorite singer, Barbara Streisand. That last note "Loving Me" left me haunting, wanting and then became a meaningful precursor this talk. Thoughts from an earlier interaction floated into my consciousness, and I began to speak. This became a natural outgrowth from that earlier encounter with a much younger and sorrowful individual.

This talk was incidental and unplanned. Initially, my intention was just to sing into my digital recorder, one of my favorite songs. It began the song "The love inside" by my favorite singer, Barbara Streisand. That last note of "loving Me" left me haunting and wanting and became a meaningful precursor to this talk. Thoughts from an earlier interaction floated into my consciousness, and I began to speak. This became a natural outgrowth from an earlier encounter with a younger and sorrowful individual.

Losing weight is not easy and it is not hard. It requires us to bring both our mind and our body in synch with our purpose. I believe that the primary purpose of weight loss is to improve and maintain our health. losing weight require effective planning and successful follow through.

A seminal moment is a time when, without prompting, you suddenly realize the true value of your worth. I know that this statement sound nonsensical but its is meant to convey a sense of change you experience at a time in your life when suddenly, you have changed. You discovered and then pivoted your mind towards a future that was incased in a desire that was unknown to you.  

You found your passion and, in that same process, discovered yourself.

This recording was done in 2016 while I was driving my 1994 Honda Delsol to Connecticut to see my brothers. It performed admirably that day and on all subsequent trips. As of today its current mileage is 143921 and still lights up by just a simple cracking  of the ignition. It is a two-seater with a responsive steering capable of making tight turns. My eldest daughter, Christine, drove it in high school, through college and first job in New York City. In 2014 she bought her own, returned the keys, and it became mine again..       

On that particular day I was gushing with admiration for its reliability and steady performance..   I love the sounds of the road, the feeling of excitement that accompanies the spinning wheels.   When making long trips alone, I  take my digital recorder  because I talk to my self. The  familiar hum of the engine along with the sounds of the open roads stimulate my thoughts and brings me comfort. I love to drive and driving this car is fun..

      On that particular trip I was thinking about this lovely individual I encountered. I am not the expert but  I do have mental health experience.  I felt compassion bubbling  up in my heart and flowing out through my imagination.. I began thinking about the mystery and dangers connected to hoarding. I thought about the unidentified hoarders among us and how their behavior is poorly understood by those "ordinary others".  

I hit "record" and  started talking.