This is Episode 006 of the NLP In Action podcast. This episode is all about matching and mirroring. Perhaps one of the most misunderstood and misused of all of the NLP tool-box.

What some believe and shouldn't

If you match and mirror an individual's physiology pitch, pace and volume and more during an interaction you'll be able to create a rapid and solid rapport with them. There is a very fine line with matching and mirroring and it's not copying and mimicking. There is nothing worse than that.

Where did the matching and mirroring idea come from?

Simple! You can observe this perfectly at work with people who are comfortable with each other. They will sit the same, breathe at the same pace, speak at similar volumes and gesture in a similar way. is very simple to see how this was discovered, and again how easy it would be to deduce that copying those patterns could, and would produce rapid cases of rapport. However, the thing that needs to be understood about this, is that these behaviours were happening on an unconscious level, therefore when the unskilled practitioner attempts to match and mirror it can happen on a very conscious level and could come across extremely awkward, and worst of all the person may realise that you're actually mimicking them which is not going to help report at all.