SARA KATE WILKINSON finds LOVE AT FIRST DANCE (2018) leads to: Cat intercourse ... THEME ... It's a beautiful day in Hallmarkia ... Rockin' pneumonia ... Pleasant and frictionless ... Pretty movie ... The Expositional Challenge ... Prescribe more air horn ... BREAK ... Plot in 15 Minutes: Inoffensive meet-cute conflict ... Swedish New York aristocracy ... Gorgeous business fiancée ... Niall Matter Appreciation Station ... Busy time for the market ... You take care of the flowers ... How to hold a cat ... Pond standing ... Hallmark Get off the Fence ... This woman is brave as hell ... Real-dancer butt differential ... BREAK ... Spot the Angel: Mutual muses or nothing! ... Classic Lines: Becca Tobin, tiny, in-character clothes and pretty; Adriana's false wedding-dress anxiety; Frank Gehry dress; sweet friends, no ulterior motives; matter, Niall mind; off-the-rack suits, shapeless tie; athlete-ass couture; boater-ass vibe ... Eat Your Heart Out: Cake tasting in a food desert; pastry turducken ... Hallmark Expanded Universe: Surly wedding planner from The Convenient Groom; dead Beetlejuice case worker vs. Very Very Valentine and Summer in the City ... Statuesque women ... BREAK ... Overdetermined: Writing your own book jacket; friendly, decent and sexless; I just want company at this point ... Crossover: Dancing movies and class distinctions; Waaaarriiiiorrrrrrs; what is the timeline here; frictionless rich-people problems; it was handed to me; Whit Stillman's Metropolitan ... Making your brokerage underwrite your plays ... Rating: 3.5 ... It *is* boring ... BREAK ... Plugz! ... The Leftovers: Nothin' but A names ... I. Am. Delivering. ... IMDB dive ... GOOP self-care capitalism ... Parking on the right side in London ... Making Sara Kate defend Buble ... Reading the Economist ... Not co-habitating ... Let's f*ck ... Merry Christmas! ... • MUSIC: "Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather • "Da' Dip," by Freak Nasty • "Big Bottom," by Spinal Tap • "Candy," by Dag • All other music by Chris Collingwood of Look Park and Fountains of Wayne, except: "Orchestral Sports Theme" by Chris Collingwood and Rick Murnane