Your Kickstarter Sucks

Good Morning Monday Morning! Today I might just feel like taking a look at a few Kickstarters, including a cabinet friend, a watch that helps you fish, and you guessed it, a way to give cops more money! And well, it looks like a great moment of history to check in on an open-carry freak, which we do in this episode because he had a Kickstarter one time. We did record this one a few weeks ago, so that’s pretty lucky! Who could have guessed something insane would happen in the interim. Ah well, neverless. Plus Jeremy Renner is here!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium - I actually think coffee has gotten so expensive that “less than a cup of coffee” no longer has the intended meaning of “very cheap”. So instead I will say that YKS Premium is your destination for hundreds of hours of bonus YKS, including all Miketobers, Jesseuarys, YKS Beach Partys, and exclusive episodes with beloved guests Stefan and John from Blocked Party, Nick and Mitch from the Doughboys, and many many times where we just changed our voices a little bit and pretended we were, like, Leonard Maltin for an hour. Those are very old episodes. Anyway, lots of good stuff on there too so check it out.

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This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Meals. Now that’s what I call, “It’s lunch or dinner”. 

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My precious listeners! I come to you once again, hat in hand, and hat on head, to ask you: check out this episode of the show. On this one we got a hat that even I (hatliking man) wouldn’t wear, an application that uses your phone camera to tell you that you are looking at a piece of food, and a crazy guy having a crazy guy kind of time. Plus, All The Rest! 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium - Oh it’s a party y’all! The hawk tuah girl is here and she says “The bonus episodes of YKS rock!” Thereby crystallizing forever our place in viral moment history! Wow! 

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Just what are these crazy YKS guys up to now? Well it all starts with the “episode introduction”. Many dedicated fans think this is the best part of any YKS episode, but the true fan knows that the show really kicks into gear around the famous 6 pack. That’s the segment of the show where the guys fabricate an extremely realistic frog prop and wing it against the wall a few times. Or, wait, I don’t know. I think it’s something else. Anyway from there it’s basically time to enter the Begging Zone, where they beg the fans not to kill them, and then about 4 more hours of dead air and it’s the end of the ep. On this week’s show, there’s a pool guy and a weird mattress thing and a mailbox idea. And the frog prop comes to life, stands up to Mike and JF, and demands its freedom. Anyway, it’s a hell of an episode. So I personally would recommend checking this one out. 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium - IT’S the place to find Mike and JF and Producer Dan too! They’re all over there waiting for you! 

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This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - You’re gonna wanna go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Uhhhh yeah. You’re gonna wanna do that. 

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Copy, paste, copy paste, it’s just that easy to write an episode description, right? Uhh….RIGHT?! On today’s episode of this crazy show we call YKS, we have a political card game, oh actually for some insane reason we basically have two of them. We also have an AI project so delusional and distasteful that I’m actually surprised we are looking at it. And lastly, we have a show by a stupid asshole who doesn’t know anything and he’s boring and sucks. And oh by the way, that’s OUR job! Plus something else so it wasn’t really “lastly” on that one. Anyway there’s some stuff on here so have a nice time I have to go to something else. 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

That awkward moment when it’s Friday and you don’t have any more YKS to listen to…

YKS Premium solves this.

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Wow we just had a big storm and my power got knocked out. I wonder if I’ll be able to get the episode uploaded in time! On this episode, which is either now being uploaded or nothing happened in any way at all and I’m sitting in the dark like a caveman, we have a screen you can go into when you pass away, which is nice, another layer of abstraction to paste over the top of any of your personal or professional interactions, which is fantastic, and a stupid little piece of rubber. Hell if there were 3 more of the damn things on here I reckon that would make for a great episode. Which there are, and it did/does! So listen to it! Even though it’s summer time and we’re all doing a lot better stuff than listening to our phones, such as (??) and (???). 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium - Ayy, where the party at! Girls is on the way, where the Bacardi at! It’s at YKS Premium! Where we really let our hair down and go crazy! Last Friday we had our friend Zöe Ligon on the show to debut our Miketober Minis with Death Spa (1988)! And this Friday, we will be going Catfish Noodlin’ on the Ol’ Mississip! Just kidding it will be a normal episode where we are sitting down inside and looking at the computer.

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This week’s episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - Yum yum yum! Food isn’t gum! That’s right gang you have to eat better stuff than gum, and our friends at Factor have just what you need! Head to Factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.

Rocket Money - Vroom vroom! Rocket Money is taking you straight to Planet Savings. Hop aboard! Oh but you can’t take those stupid subscriptions with you. That’s okay, right? You want to go to Planet Savings, don’t you, bud? Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS! Now!

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I just thought of a guy called “Mr. Electricity”. He could probably zap around and do a lot of fun stuff…plus he would have electricity! Nobody will ever make a movie of this brainless superhero idea I just crapped out in 5 seconds. No. Instead, we’ll all march to the googooplexes to see the latest Noah Baumbach dramedy set in in New York City like the dutiful little consumers we all are. I’m so sick of how Creatives are Punished! Luckily, on today’s show we are giving back to the true creative minds of the earth, by highlighting their wonderful Kickstarter ideas, such as: a fan you put on kids’ food to cool it down, a game you play on Thanksgiving only, and an AI way to talk to your dead grandma. For this public service, we ask nothing in return. Except to please listen to the show, rate us on iTunes, send us emails and voicemails, follow us on social media, and subscribe to the Patreon. A fair trade…for art, no?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The only place to find The Bryan Files and our many other celebrated journalistic achievements. Join the Patreon today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and be among the first to see the next ideas we ever come up with.

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This episode of YKS brought to you by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - Go to HelloFresh.com/YKSApps for free apps for life or just use your phone. Well those aren’t free, nevermind. But the HelloFresh ones are. So I’d just go there. 

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Man it got really hot outside recently. I walked out there in my pajamas and I got super sweaty. I guess that’s summer for you. But now I’m safely inside and I’ll remember next time to not go outside in my pajamas. I might just stay inside for the next 50 or so years! Ha ha. Just kidding. On today’s show, we have the standard AI slopdump, and a little bit “Extra” for ya! Including a bigtime loser pretending he’s not a loser, some kind of cold-making contraption, and finally a pillow that will bring both sides of the aisle together. And is that all? No, I guess not but that’s the gist of the situation. To go beyond the gist, listen to the show now! 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

Want more YKS Premium? Er, I mean do you want more YKS. Then go to YKS Premium! This week on the show, we continue our special investigative series with…The Bryan Files.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - I like this website because you get food from it. Use code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!

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What more could be said about Episode 357 that hasn’t already been said…Well, for one thing, I suppose we must note that Webster’s Dictionary defines Episode 357 as “The Episode that takes place in between Episodes 356 and 358.” Interestingly, this Episode would go on to become one of the many episodes of YKS released for public consumption in the year 2024. Well if that doesn’t beat all! But what made this episode of YKS so remarkable? An inscrutable lifestyle brand? A stupid fucking sculpture? An actual fascist militia fundraising on the stupid spinning top and board game website? Whatever the case, it certainly has gone down in history as one of the things you can hear on your phone. Which you can start doing…now! Now that you’ve read the description of the episode which you always do first. Thanks.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium ← This is where I would go if I wanted more YKS. Just sayin…

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Rocket Money!!!! You da man!!! Stop wasting money on stuff you don’t need. Use Rocket Money…and let the Money “Rocket” (rock it)! At RocketMoney.com/yks

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Are you ready to challenge your understanding of wealth building and market dynamics? Imagine for a moment, what if everything you thought you knew about markets was wrong? Well honestly, it probably fucking is. I’m so stupid I thought a baggage service that took my bags from the airport and delivered them to me later was good. I thought a stair-vacuuming robot was worth several million dollars. I even thought there should be a paintball gun attached to a security camera that shot anyone who walked near my house. But of course, I was wrong. And that’s why I’ll never become The Market Genius. Will you? Listen to this episode to find out! 

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. 

YKS Premium – with 750 hours of exclusive, ad-free content available, there has to be at least a few good ones, right? Well, our thousands of satisfied customers can’t possibly be wrong! Or dead with credit card numbers still functioning. There’s no way, right? That would be insane. Anyway there is a ton of stuff there that’s good to hear. I think this week we may even get an update on our of old favorite “jokey” sites…It’s JokeBlogger if you don’t remember. 

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