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In this Think It Through episode, Drs. Derek and Laura Cabrera of Cornell University tackle one of the most frustrating human experiences: knowing exactly what you should do—and doing the opposite anyway.

Is this a motivation problem, a discipline problem, or something deeper? Using systems thinking and real-world examples like smoking, exercising, speaking up in meetings, and setting boundaries, they reveal the real issue: your behavior is faithfully executing a mental model you haven’t fully seen yet.

They explain why mental models can contain contradictory “should” and “should not” rules at the same time, how behavior and language act as road signs to what’s really driving you, and why judging yourself only strengthens the wrong feedback loop. Through practical walkthroughs and a powerful workplace example, they show how to unpack, test, and reorganize mental models so behavior changes naturally—without force or shame.

If you’ve ever wondered why willpower isn’t working, this episode will help you see what’s actually going on and give you a clear, humane way forward.